Cleaning up the mess

 

If you think this mess in my bedroom is bad, you should have seen my living room!  But after 2 1/2 years of losing my 2 best friends, and 2 years of pandemic, there's a lot of mess to clean up in my life.  Getting my transgender identity in order is only part of that cleanup.

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Something I now say to any woman I want to get serious with is both that I enjoy dressing in women's clothes and that I go to work as a woman.  I play down the transgender part of my identity, as I am more than willing to live my life in both masculine and feminine roles in order to have a healthy romance.  Although it has cost me a relationship or two, I have found over the years that some women are open minded enough to take a chance with me.

A while back, FL gave me some advice, to not focus on what I would rather have been born as, but to focus on my wardrobe simply as a kink I enjoy.  And I've taken this advice.  Right now, RQS remains curious and unafraid of her possible feelings.  That's a good thing.  Unlike FL, we have progressed tolerably slowly, but steadily.  She knows what she's getting in me, and she knows the risks of a relationship with me.  That's a good thing.

As I gradually clean up the mess in my apartment, I'm gradually cleaning up the mess in my life.  I no longer think of what I lost over the past 2 1/2 years on a daily basis.  Instead, it comes up when I feel a little lonely, and have nothing better to distract me.  Cleaning up my place has taken on a new urgency, as I want RQS to visit my place for a change.  I hope that she doesn't get shocked when she sees how I live....