Monday, February 10, 2025

Eastern Caribbean Cruise - Sea Day (01/24/25)

 


There is not much to say about sea days on a cruise ship.  There are entertainment activities to keep one busy, as well as a healthy supply of food onboard to occupy one's time.  So far, I have not been over indulging, and I have felt sated with human sized portions of food.  This doesn't mean that I usually eat too much on a cruise.  Instead, I usually walk more when I'm on a cruise, and maintain my weight. 

Today, I didn't have much to write about.  So I wrote an entry which will get posted to this blog in roughly four weeks.  However, I'll recount the day here to give you an idea of what a sea day on a ship can be like.

- - - - - -

RQS and I took our time getting out of bed, and barely made it to lunch in one of the main dining rooms. Coincidentally, we ended up sitting at the table where I was assigned on the first cruise on this line. After a nice meal of fish and chips, we left to have dessert in the buffet because we didn't have attentive service from our waiter.

We went back to our cabin and rested a while before getting dressed for gala night dinner.  Unfortunately, we were a little bit late and didn't have the chance to get our formal pictures taken.  So we met our table mates and had another nice conversation over dinner.  Again, service was slow and error prone - RQS didn't get her glass of wine as she ordered.  While at dinner, RQS spilled some dessert on her dress - there went the chance to get a nice picture of us taken.

After a bio break, it was time to go to the theater.  Well, we had made reservations, but this didn't mean much - they no longer bothered to make sure that people had reservations to enter the theater.  This meant that the theater was overcrowded by the time we got there.  In case of emergency, it would have been impossible to exit quickly.  So we left as the show was about to start, and made it back to the buffet for a quick snack before returning to our cabin.

Was it a nice day fr us?  Yes.  But nothing much to write about.

Sunday, February 9, 2025

Eastern Caribbean Cruise - Embarkation Day (01/23/25)

 


Our day started by waking up "early", so that we'd make it to the cruise terminal by 12:30 pm.  This meant that we'd have to cook and eat breakfast, get showered and dressed, and into an Uber by 11:30 am to make it on time.  What didn't help is that we had some minor last minute packing to take care of, and RQS forgot her cane.  (Hopefully, she can buy one while on the cruise, or while we're in port.)

The Uber came on time, and we had a very nice driver, someone who was willing to take a side street to bypass traffic on the BQE.  We arrived at the terminal at 12:45 pm, and were snaking through the terminal for another half hour after that.  Once on the ship, we dumped our bags off in the room, then made it to the buffet to have lunch and kill some time before the muster drill.

As is the case with MSC, one does not watch a muster drill in person.  Instead, one watches a video to know what to do in case of an emergency, dials a number to register having seen the video, then report to the emergency station to show one knows where it is in case of an emergency.

- - - - - -

All too soon, it was time for dinner.  We were seated at a shared table with two nice people.  Yes, I might have run my mouth a little.  But they seemed to have enjoyed our company, and we hope to be seeing them for dinner until the cruise ends.  While dining, we found that the gentlemen across from me was a vegan, and had some trouble getting something he could eat.

After dinner, we made our entertainment reservations for the cruise, and then went up to the cabin for the evening.  We were greeted by our two large suitcases being placed by the door, and started to unpack for the trip.  In short, it was a busy day, but one which prepared us to enjoy our 10-day cruise. 

Saturday, February 8, 2025

By the time you read this, I'll be back from my cruise.

 


I've been alluding to this cruise for a while.  However, for purposes of safety, I didn't want to start talking about it until I returned.

- - - - - -

When we booked this cruise, I was thinking of how RQS and I could spend some time together in a warm climate, while I presented as Marian for a few days.  Over time, we settled on the above 10 day cruise.  But the idea of me spending time as Marian went by the wayside, as I couldn't get information from the DR regarding whether I'd have problems with a gender presentation which conflicts with my legal ID.  In addition, we had a snowstorm the weekend before we left, followed by sub freezing temperatures until the day we were to board the ship.

After the holiday season, the thing I wanted to do most was to hunker down inside for a few months and come out of hibernation when spring comes.  Instead, I ended up having to plan for a trip I wasn't completely excited about taking.  About the only thing that interested me about this trip was the possibility of visiting historic sites in San Juan, something which was impossible when I made port there on an NCL cruise which arrived after 4 pm.

As I've mentioned in this and my other blog, I am not a fan of cruise lines "hot docking" their ships, so that multiple ships can be in port on the same day.  I feel that this is a disservice to cruisers, as one is often unable to have a chance to properly enjoy a port. In fact, I chose an Alaska cruise with one of my criteria being whether the ship spent a full day in each of the Alaskan ports where the ship docked.  Our January cruise does not "hot dock" at any of its ports, but it will spend 6 days at sea (including Embarkation day) on a 10-day cruise.  We made a trade-off to have full port days and extra days at sea to have our 10-day getaway.

Given that we are sailing on MSC in a sub-optimal inside cabin below the entrance to the buffet, I expect that we'll have to deal with noise coming from the deck above. Neither RQS nor I are impressed by the quality of MSC's entertainment.  Yet, it is good enough for us to have considered sailing the line again.  The same goes for the food.  Unlike what we got used to on Princess and NCL, MSC's specialty dinner package offerings do not give the same bang per buck. On this trip, we opted NOT to buy specialty meal packages in advance and to enjoy the food served in the main dining room, with the possible exception of going to the on-board taco joint..

MSC is a line known for low priced cruising.  It also has some of the most reasonably priced shore excursions compared with similar excursions offered by NCL  Both RQS and I feel that NCL's excursions have been excessively marked up by the cruise line.  Contrast this with MSC, where we get good excursions at a very reasonable price.  On our past Bermuda cruises, NCL was charging $140 for a tour that visited the Crystal Caves, while MSC charged $80 for a similar experience.  (I may be comparing apples to pears here, as NCL offered an extra stop on its tour.)  Yes, MSC does a quite bit of nickel-diming, but in general one will get decent value for money spent.

While I'm cruising, I'll be writing posts about the cruise that you'll be seeing here over the next few days. Hopefully, you will enjoy our exploits.  One thing I am certain to do will be to ask the people at the pier whether "My Sister" (as I refer to myself when presenting as Mario) will have trouble at the port if she presents as Marian, but presents Mario's ID.  (It worked in Bermuda, why not elsewhere?)

Friday, February 7, 2025

The other day I had a conversation....

 

The other day, I had a chat with Vicki.  She noted that she didn't know when I was going over the top or whether I was being serious.  To tell the truth, I tend to do thought experiments where I take off the limits imposed by social taboos.  And people do not know what to make of me because of this.

An example of my way of thinking is allowing the public, not the politicians, to decide between two extremes of dealing with our border problems, ending political paralysis on this issue:

  1. Should we increase the budgets of both border control and asylum judiciary areas, so that we can both police the border humanely and process asylum claims quickly.

    ---- OR ----

  2.  Issue "2-legged hunting permits", and let gun happy nuts shoot bullets at illegals trying to cross the border, firing from the American side at targets on the Mexican side.
In short, should we force the public to make a simple choice between humane treatment of people and inhumane treatment of people.

The conversation veered into many areas, and I posed some topics that most people would consider taboo, such as:
  1. Given how poorly educated the American public is, require people to have completed a high school education to gain the right to vote.  (There are many problems with this, but remember - this is a only a thought experiment.)

  2. Denying people who are too poor to raise children the ability to procreate until they can show enough earning capacity to properly take care of a child.

  3. Allowing prisoners the ability to vote in general elections.

  4. Public executions of illegal aliens who have committed felonies.

  5. Guardrails for both the 1st Amendment and 2nd Amendment to the US Constitution.
There were more items on this list, but the difference between me and Vicki is a recognition that Democracy might not be the best solution for a country in certain circumstances.  I recognize that even freedom of speech may not be an absolute right.  For example, the nation of El Salvador has committed many human rights abuses in order to wrest control of the country from the gangs that previously terrorized the country.  Its popular leader is a dictator who has successfully put most of the nation's gang members into prison or forced them into exile.  My question is: How much freedom is too much freedom?  (Please note that I believe in Jeffersonian Democracy, but with the guardrails developed by Alexander Hamilton.)  Vicki can't get over the idea that certain freedoms should be checked, if only to prevent an autocrat from taking power - as Trump did on January 20th.

So I have a question:  If a well informed and well educated public is needed for a functioning democracy, how much freedom has to be taken away from people to force them to be well educated?  Sadly, I keep getting reminded of Juvenal's 6th satire:

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

--- OR ---
 
Who's watching the watchmen?

If I had a better answer to this question than to trust that an educated public would do the job, I'd have solved one of the major political problems that keep perplexing us thousands of years after the question was first posed....

Thursday, February 6, 2025

Lunch and Dinner, or: Where are the police when you need them?

 

I had two things on the docket for today.  But the thing of most interest today was an accident that almost happened.

- - - - -

I woke up around 9 am, not having much sleep last night.  So I took my time getting ready to go out to see Vicki for a late lunch.  But first, I had to shovel out the snow around my car.  That involved getting dressed as Mario, clearing the show off the car, and shoveling a clear path to the plowed section of the driveway.  Luckily, the snow wasn't too heavy, and I was able to get this done in 20 minutes.

After a brief stop for breakfast, I went home to shower and get dressed as Marian.  And then, it was off to Mt. Kisco to meet Vicki for lunch.  Arriving at the restaurant, I found that the meters weren't working today, as it was a Federal holiday.  Even though I was glad to see Vicki, I really wasn't in the mood to talk politics, as there's nothing we could do to avoid the upcoming 4 year disaster.

Once done with lunch, I drove over to Route 684, and was about to make a "California Stop" at the light for a right turn on red, so that I could get on the highway.  There was a police car to my left and an idiot that sped up along the shoulder and almost hit me as I was starting to make a right turn onto the highway.  (If I had started movement to the entrance ramp even 1 second earlier, my car would have been totaled.)  As I made my turn, the police car turned across traffic, sped past me, then pulled the idiot over before he got on the highway.  Boy, was I relieved!  The idiot was about to get what he rightly deserved - a very expensive ticket!

Next, I killed time at Starbucks before going to the meetup for dinner. Unfortunately, most of the people who reserved a place at dinner bailed without notice, and only 3 of us were there for dinner.  By the time I finished my cheeseburger, I was stuffed.  I couldn't eat another bite. 

On the way home, my brother and I chatted about the house we rent out.  Now that the tenants are gone, there are some improvements we may make.  Will it cost money?  Yes.  But we should recoup our money relatively quickly.  And then he got to talking about what should happen when my sister in law passes (hopefully, she will go first).  It makes sense for him to sell his homestead at that time due to the $500k tax exclusion he'd have that year, then take some of his capital gains to buy me out.  He'd live in the family homestead for a few years, and then repeat the process to get more tax free money out of his home equity.  

It was a good day.  But it certainly didn't go as I expected. 

- - - - - -

On other matters....

Sadly, the Orange Snowflake has been inaugurated, and he has already made some anti-transgender statements.  Hopefully, my readers who have needed to get their gender marker on their personal IDs updated, have already done so before today.  I think it will be at least 4 years before people will be able to do this for Federally issued documents again.

Wednesday, February 5, 2025

It's amazing - Life keeps throwing curveballs, and I keep fouling them off.

 

Sometimes, I feel like I'm a woman on the home front during the war years.  Yes, I have my female friends to comfort me, but the men that remained stateside all have problems not worth dealing with.  Today, I decided to write a message to DCD, telling him how I felt about him, as well as his relationships with others.  This message reads as follows:

DCD -  

Your ex contacted me first to find out where you were one day, as she couldn't reach you for a Friday shift. She then got into telling me how you were chronically late for shifts, and that you got fired from the job at the YMCA. She noted that she's moved on with her life, and wants you gone from her place. Yet, the other day, she came home and found you curled up on her bed. I have no objective way to know exactly what is going on with you and her, but it is unhealthy for you to live at her place or to even use her house as your mailing address. 

While on the subject of mailing addresses, she noted that you have had several P.O. boxes, that you have stopped paying, and that a lot of mail never reaches you. I know that you have changed your phone numbers several times, possibly because bill collectors are trying to reach you. In one case, they tried to send a service notice at her place, but you were not there. My advice to both of you is to cut the umbilical cord that holds you two together and start living your own independent lives.

Your ex made me aware of the fact that she told you not to call for assistance when your car ran out of gas, but to walk to the gas station and get a gallon or two to fill up the car. You didn't, and the car was taken from you. Can you bail the car out? Without income, I doubt it. I guess I will be on your long list of creditors, as you are already 6 months behind in payments. And without transportation, you will likely never be able to pay me back - like others who have tried to help you.

You need to ask for help. There are public shelters in Connecticut and New York. You are likely sick - the inoperable brain tumor for which you had radiation may be affecting your judgement. Get that help now, before you start spiraling down the path of helplessness and destitution. You have a habit of ignoring people's advice and going against their suggestions to prove you have good judgement - which you don't have. A while back, I asked you why you didn't try to get your child support lessened when you didn't have a pot to piss in. You didn't have a good answer. Right now, it is more important for you to only make commitments that you are certain to keep and not make those you only hope to keep if you are lucky. You should never have bought my car unless you were absolutely sure you could pay me back. Given your history, it'll be a miracle if you ever pay me back for the car. As they say - no good deed goes unpunished.
These comments are not meant to harm you. Instead, they are a last hope of getting you on a path where you seek help and get it, to rebuild yourself for the years you have left above ground. You can continue along this path of self-destruction. Or you can get help in rebuilding your life. The choice is yours. and only yours. You have burnt too many bridges among family and friends to get help from these sources. You may need to ask one last person (not me) to refer you to adult protective services for the help you need. But if you get that help, don't waste anyone's time. Start rebuilding your life., and take responsibility for your life and the decisions you make in it.

Marian

Well, I know he's a bit defensive, as I received the following:

I appreciate your support. As with my ex and her meaning, well, I get upset at the suppositions that are made. I may have burnt some bridges but I do not believe that my ex's or your knowledge base of my life gives you enough information to state that I have burnt so many bridges that I can not get get help from those resources. 

My wanting or not wanting to involve family and friends is a matter of my privacy and how I want to be seen by others. It disturbs me to have to explain this to you and as I have had to in past to my ex.

Defensive?  Yes.  And also a little upset, as I have called him to account for his own failings.  He's gone through a lot of shit in his life.  Yet, he has to learn to "Get Over It". Or simply, to climb his mountain of problems and conquer them.  One can either be a victim or survivor in life, it's all a matter of attitude.  DCD has to find that special power inside himself, harness it, and conquer all of his demons.  This isn't easy when you're approaching 60, and haven't a pot to piss in.

Did I handle things wrong?  I'm not sure.  Reading his response made me think that he's afraid to be honest with people.  He didn't challenge my core assumptions: that he is not able to handle responsibility that well, and that he needs help.

- - - - - -

Now, why did I say that I keep fouling off curve balls?

Well, the answer is simple.  The other day, my main credit card was compromised, and I'm finding it easier than expected (so far) to attach these accounts to a new credit card account. Today, I had to run out to several stores before a major snow storm arrives.  Couple all of this with having to think about DCD just before going away on a cruise, and it seems like I'm hanging on "at bat" as best I can.





Tuesday, February 4, 2025

Thank god for computerized fraud detection!

 


This is another short post, as I am tired and have to get up early in the morning to avoid an incoming snowstorm.  As I write this, I just got back to RQS's place after seeing a Broadway Play (more on that tomorrow), just in time for SNL's Weekend Update.  And shortly afterwards, RQS and I plan to go to bed, so that I can start getting up around 7 am.

- - - - - -

The highlight/low light of the day was figuring out how I will deal with the inability to use a now compromised credit card.A new card (with new account number) would be sent to me, but not before my upcoming cruise.  This will force me to spend a couple of hours updating the credit cards for all of my regular payments such as Netflix, Amazon Prime, Uber, etc. once I'm home.  One doesn't realize how many places where one uses a card for payments until one thinks of all the subscriptions and stored payment information that uses a selected account.

If the weather prediction wasn't for snow, I'd have planned on taking my time to go home.  Instead, I'll have to rush home and start on fixing things.  Keep your fingers crossed that no more accounts have been compromised.

Eastern Caribbean Cruise - Sea Day (01/24/25)

  There is not much to say about sea days on a cruise ship.  There are entertainment activities to keep one busy, as well as a healthy suppl...