I'm afraid of being noticed for what I'm not.

 

RQS knows that I'm a little nervous about my future trip to Hawaii, as I will be flying as Marian for the first time.  This doesn't mean that I will travel as Mario.  Instead, it means that I will be aware that I may trigger alerts whenever I go through a security checkpoint and that I will need to figure out a way to keep my beard stubble under control whenever I interact with "civilians".

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Traveling as Marian to Hawaii doesn't mean that I'll be taking my first cruise with RQS as Marian.  For this cruise, I'll be traveling as Mario.  But, we haven't booked our cruise yet.  On Friday, I finally got up the nerve to talk to my boss about taking unpaid time off to take a trip. My boss said that this shouldn't be a problem - I should just give her the details and she should be able to take care of things.  I guess that I'm simply afraid of being seen as a troublemaker, and that's the root of my nervousness.

When I worked for the bank, I knew that I (once) had a high value to the organization and that I could usually name my terms regarding time off.  Now that I'm working as a grunt, it's hard to think about having much freedom until I retire.  Luckily, I will be forced to submit my resignation 2 weeks before my Hawaii cruise, and that I will feel good after having done so.