Weekends aren't what they used to be.

No picture can do this artwork justice - it is too large to be captured in a single picture.  To appreciate it, one has to get close to these giant pieces of rolled steel, walk around them and inside them to appreciate them for what they are.  As much as I think the artist (Richard Serra) is an asshole for his reaction to people who rejected his work (Tilted Arc) because it interfered with with their movement in a congested area of Manhattan, I will give him credit for having made interesting, engaging art with large pieces of steel.

You might be asking: why am I starting off with this picture?  It's because my weekend started off with a museum visit with GFJ.  And it's something we used to do more of in the early days of our relationship.

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GFJ and I planned to take the same train into NYC.  That meant that she had to make it to Beacon by 11:00 for an 11:10 train, and I would have to make it to Cortlandt 30 minutes later.  GFJ was expecting that I would meet her in Croton, and was very surprised that I got on the train 1 stop earlier.  We had a pleasant conversation on our way into NYC, with me making commentary on the little things I've noticed in my countless number of commutes into the city.

You'll note in the above picture, that the sign for the Museum of the American Gangster is almost an afterthought in the picture.  This is by design.  The museum is in a small part of the building which houses a Theater, a Bar, and a group of residences.  Who'd suspect the history that this building has unless s/he has taken the museum tour.

The museum of the American Gangster is a small museum with few artifacts.  If you were to go there and look at the main exhibit floor, you'd think you were being ripped off for the $20 admission fee.  And I wouldn't blame you for feeling this way.  I've been to museums which have had many more and better artifacts related to the American Mobs and Prohibition. (For example, one museum I visited has the car that Bonnie and Clyde were in when they were gunned down.  Another had bricks of grape juice, which when "improperly" stored and handled according to cautionary warnings on the box, would "accidentally" turn from grape juice into wine. And the Museum of the American Constitution in Philadelphia had a "Whiskey 8" motorcar on display.)

There are two redeeming things about this museum.  The first is that the is housed in a former brothel, and the tour walks you from the brothel area, through the speakeasy (now a legal bar), and ends in the ballroom of the speakeasy where the "Swells" danced the night away.  The other thing about the museum was the tour guide.  She gave a reasonably comprehensive history of the American Mob up to the 1970's in a 60 minute tour, and provided tidbits that my readings on the subject did not cover. (I love reading about vice in America, and enjoy visiting places such as "Miss Dolly's" (in Ketchikan, AK) for their immoral history.  (BTW - I missed "Miss Dolly's" on my trip to Alaska because of my then ignorance, and will go to that museum if I get there again.)

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Once we were done with the museum, we went to Chinatown, ending up at the Nom Wah Tea Parlor.  And that's where we gorged on Dim Sum.  YUM!   By the time we finished our meal, we had a single "meal sized" egg roll left, and I asked for it to be put into a doggie bag to go.  However, I wasn't really into bringing this treat home with me, nor was GFJ into doing it due to the length of our trips home.  If I had seen a trash receptacle, I'd have deposited the egg roll there.  But I ended up doing something that someone was grateful for.  There was a homeless person on the street begging for money - and he was very glad that I gave him that egg roll.  I guess providence was guiding me today without me knowing it.

Next, GFJ was interested in seeing Rockefeller Center's Christmas Tree.  So we took the train to Times Square, and walked to 50th street and over to 5th avenue.  The area was jam packed with people, and it was almost impossible to get a view of the tree.  But we were able to get a couple of pictures before moving on.  When we reached 5th avenue, we couldn't move any further.  Saks 5th Avenue's store Christmas Light display was causing people to pack themselves in like sardines to watch the animated display of lights.  When the active display ended, we could barely get into a position to make it to St. Patrick's Cathedral.

The last time I was at St. Pat's, the place was under renovation.  Tonight, I can appreciate why so many people consider the cathedral a special place (from a non religious viewpoint). It is a beautiful building.  But it is not a church I'd want to attend - if one were to attend services there, one is merely a face in the crowd.  This is not the feeling I want when I go to church.  About 20 minutes later, we left the church and went back to Grand Central for our train home.  We got there with about 10 minutes to spare before the train left - and had a relaxing ride up the river with nothing serious being said.

All in all it was a pleasant day, and it was the type of thing we should have done more often to keep things special between the two of us.

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Sunday came early, and I didn't.  I should say that the sun came out, and I turned off all of my alarms then slept until the afternoon.  This, I expect, should screw up my sleep patterns for the next week or two.

There was a basket of clothes to be washed, a basket of clean clothes to put away, and a pile of folded clothes on the other side of the bed waiting to go into dresser drawers - all waiting for me to take care of them.  Since my cleaning lady would be expected to come this Thursday for her monthly visit,  this would be the perfect day to straighten things up, pick up a Christmas gift or two, and make some productive use of my time.  But did I do most of this?  Nooooooo!

For the most part, I lounged around all day until 6:30 pm or so.  Eventually, I made it to BJ's where I didn't find what I was looking for (a pair of sweats I could give to my dad on his birthday and on Xmas), but still ended up spending $90 or so.  On the way home from there, I chatted with GFJ, and then picked up stuff at the supermarket before going home for the night.

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I don't feel bad about today's inactivity because I have a busy week ahead of me.  Tomorrow, I'll have an Arts Westchester meeting followed by a Fun Time Friends meetup. Tuesday will have me seeing people for a Census Bureau position, then attending the last co-op board meeting of the year.  Wednesday will be relatively free, as I only have dinner with the Beacon Dining Meetup Group on my schedule.  Thursday is dedicated to Lunch with BXM, followed by games in Yonkers.  (I may use the gap between these two events to either see a movie or to pass my my brother's place to check on things.) And Friday will likely be my weekly stint at the LGBT Center, followed by dinner with Patty.  Now, if only I could find some time to see about applying for Global Entry (and scheduling an in-person appointment), so that I can get a TSA Trusted Traveler number and expedited customs clearance when I return on an international flight.










  

I slept late, and found I had nothing to do after all.

Last night, I must have been exhausted.  Normally, I get to sleep around 2 am or so, and wake up between 8 and 9 am.  Today, I woke up a little before noon, and didn't get moving until about 1 pm.  This got in the way of me driving to Mavis in time for me to get a needed oil change and tire rotation.  But if I get up and out early enough tomorrow, this won't be a problem.

But first....

Given how tired I was yesterday, sleeping late this morning was a great blessing.  Getting 10+ hours of sleep is very important, and I felt very rested when I got up.  However, I realized that I had to check on things.  The first thing I did was to check the status of a meetup being held tonight.  The organizer had cancelled it due to a lack of interest.  It's no great loss.  This person has organized and disbanded several groups in the past, and never seems to keep one open long enough to gain a loyal group of followers.  (I attended one of the two women's groups she organized, and didn't feel as welcome as I did with the Fun Time Friends in Connecticut.)  Next, I got showered and dressed (as Mario), and visited Mavis to see about getting my car service done.  As I mentioned earlier, this wasn't possible today, as they had cars double parked in their parking lot.  But I did have a great chat with the desk clerk, a 21 year old fellow with much of his life ahead of him.

Going home from Mavis, I had to stop by the bank and get some money from the ATM.  One big problem - the ATM's card reader was having problems with my card.  Since this is the second time this happened on the same machine (worse now than before), I decided to inside the branch to report a problem.  Getting to the teller station, we checked my card by putting it in the reader there - no problems.  Hopefully, they will fix the problem with the outdoor ATM, as I don't like the headache of being unsure of my card's usefulness to me.

As much as I wanted to change and go out again as Marian, I couldn't find the energy to do so.  Instead, I stayed at home and took care of some little things before packing it in for the night.

Another out to dinner, this time with HWV and another board member.

Today started out with three things on my docket, but I could only deal with two of them.  I wasn't up to having lunch with Vicki #2, as my GI Tract was giving me problems.  But I was up to going to my weekly speech therapy session, then to dinner with HWV and another board member (let's call her HWJ for now).  There was only so much I was willing to take on today, and I figured that I could postpone lunch with Vicki until next week.

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I wasn't feeling that great when I got up this morning - I was sneezing a lot, as my nose was running the 4 minute mile.  No, I did not have a cold.  Instead, I have suffered with my usual autumn allergy season problems.  Once things settled down, I texted Vicki to tell her that I wasn't going to make it today, asking to postpone until the following week.  This allowed me another, much needed, hour in bed,  And then it was time to get ready.  I was lucky to be home, as my GI Tract started to rebel on me. Then it was time to get showered, shaved, etc. before driving to Mercy College.

Arriving at Mercy a few minutes early, I paid my bill.  And I wish I had had more time, as my GI Tract was again telling me that it was in a rebellious state.  So I went into my session, and within 5 minutes it was off to the restroom.  AARGH!  Luckily, I wasn't long there, and I was able to complete a compressed session.

On the way home, I chatted with GFJ.  As much as I'm interested in going to a comedy club meetup (and having dinner with her beforehand), there's a part of me that would rather spend the day as Marian.  (Just don't say that to her right now.)  Soon, she'll be going to Florida with her friend, and I hope she has a great time there.

As for me, I figured that I had about an hour to get ready for dinner with HWV and HWJ.  Tonight's restaurant week dinner was scheduled for the Red Hat Bistro in Irvington.  Vicki and I chatted about this place, and she warned me about how high prices are carefully bypassed when wait staff mentions specials on the menu. 

Around 6:15, HWV and HWJ arrived and we drove to dinner in the rain.  Arriving around 7:00, we got out of the car and found that the winds were gusting at 30+ mph, and it wasn't worth bothering to use our umbrellas.   Once inside the restaurant, we sat down and enjoyed a nice dinner from the restaurant week menu.  I was asked about my transgender nature, and I told both ladies that I wish I had been born with the correct plumbing, and that if it weren't for romance and family considerations, that I'd already be living as Marian 24x7.  (We went into this in much more detail than what I'm doing here.)  But I noted that until I am 24x7, I won't be attending co-op board meetings as Marian.  Why confuse people?

A little after 9:15, we left the restaurant and drove home on local roads.  I was not in a rush, and I didn't trust the conditions on the highways.  Getting home, we agreed that we must do this again soon - and I hope that it is much sooner than later.

Waking up early on a Sunday morning.

Since GFJ dropped her bombshell last weekend, I haven't been sleeping that well.  And I was very surprised that I could wake up early, chat with GFJ by text, and then go to church for the first time in a couple of years. 

But I am getting ahead of myself....

Last night, it was the "Fall Back" part of the year - just as the clock struck 3 am, my phone shifted back to standard time and now read 2 am.  And that's when I put my CPAP mask on and tried to go to sleep.  Several hours later, I realized that it was a little before 8 am, and I had the option of going to church.

Looking again at my phone, I saw that GFJ sent a message.  I figured that I would reply, and that got us into a chat.  She'd like to see me again for dinner tomorrow - and that doesn't bode well for a relationship already on life support.  So, I have to gird myself for further potential feelings of grief and lose a night out with a meetup group.  (Why couldn't her timing be better?) By the time our chat was done, I realized that I could make it to church.  So I got showered and prepared to attack the world as Marian.

Leaving the house at the same time as my neighbor, I knew that I was going to get to the church before her.  It's a nice feeling to know that people remember and accept me there, as I was greeted by one of the church's more active members when I arrived.  After the service, I had some nice chats with several people there before retreating to have lunch at an Ossining diner.

I sat down at my seat, and placed an order for breakfast - something (strangely) that was not on one of the menu pages.  (Was the menu put together properly?  Or, is there a separate breakfast menu?)  While waiting for food, I looked at my phone and noticed that my former travel partner had started her own meetup group, and scheduled meetings for Thursdays.  I took two things away from this.  First, without the ability to use me for a crutch, she was forced to do this on her own - something I'm glad she did.  Second, I feel that she chose Thursdays so that I wouldn't join her group or go to its meetups - more her problem than mine.  I sent a quick message to GFJ on this and mentioned the first point.  What I didn't say is that I was glad that I cut off contact with my former travel partner, as I didn't want to be in a codependent relationship with her - something that could easily happen given our mutual weaknesses.

On other matters....

Throughout the day, I exchanged messages with JS.  Her daughter has lined up a job, but with no way to get there and back from where they live.  It's a shame that Mother and Daughter don't make a move to a more mass transit friendly community, so that the daughter can get a job and establish herself as an independent entity.  JS is killing herself with her long commute and is not doing what needs to be done to see that her daughter can make it on her own.

If I don't get together with my niece next weekend, I'll end up accompanying JS to see a psychic in Massachusetts.  Do I really think this person will be of help to JS?  NO!  But I want to see the scam for myself.  JS is an emotionally weak person, and I fear that she will get preyed on by an unscrupulous person - and many psychics are unscrupulous by the nature of their "profession".

Wish me good luck.  I think I'll need it.

Ending the week on an off note

I only had a visit to Arts Westchester on the docket for today,  Last week, I said that I'd be making a return visit - and my contact at AW forgot that I was coming.  So she wasn't prepared for me when I arrived.  Yet, there was work that I could do that involved miscellaneous office chores . And I did that work for a couple of hours, until there was no more work to do. On the way home, I got a call from WDJ telling me about the first meeting of her new meetup group.  It didn't go as expected, but what first gatherings go as planned?  I wish her a lot of success with the group, and then remembered to sign up for it when I got home.

As you can guess, there wasn't much to occupy my day.  Since I was very tired when I got home, I stripped off my clothes and took a nap.  GFJ would likely not be coming down tonight, as she wasn't feeling that good.  Hopefully, she'll feel good enough to go for her hike tomorrow (with dinner afterwards).  If not, I'd better start looking for a meetup to go to on Sunday.  Or, I should prepare to drive to Long Island (in male presentation) to see my family. No matter what happens tonight, I still have no idea about what I'll be doing come Sunday....