A little bit of daylight shopping and a Zoom with the Girls

 

This is another picture of the woman whose body I should have inhabited.  I love the confidence she projects in this image, something I never had growing up having to present as a male.  When I showed this picture to MSJ, her reaction was of a person who didn't like all of the headaches a woman faces in our culture.  And that is an attitude I picked up years ago from my former cruise partner, someone who I think wishes she had been born into a male body.

 

Why do I mention this?

 

Tonight would be a zoom meeting with my friends from Texas.  Although they know that I'm TG, they see me as female for most things.  And yet, in the back of their minds, who knows how they really feel?

 

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When I finally got moving today, it was too late to do much of anything.  So, I decided to make a run to Yorktown to have 2 slices of pizza, then go shopping at Uncle Guiseppe's.  This would give me a chance to go outside, and be able to stay near my house for tonight's Zoom meeting.

 

Around 7:45 pm, I opened up the zoom meeting, and by 8, all 4 of us were on line. One of our Texas friends became very open about what was going on at her job, giving us a much better idea of the role she plays in her company.  The other friend discussed her upcoming trip to Louisiana, noting that New Orleans is always a great place to visit.  And that's when I mentioned that I might be driving out to Tuscon with my brother, with the assumption that he gets his new job out there.. I noted that I'd take Amtrak to New Orleans, then stay there for a few days before returning to NYC.  That's when the gals suggested meeting in the Big Easy.  I reluctantly had to squash this, as I'd be traveling as Mario, and that I couldn't afford to travel as Marian through the "Bible Belt" due to the laws against us TG's. (Later on, RQS mentioned that it was a positive indicator that they want to see us in person again.)  

 

All too soon, the Zoom meeting ended, and I was done for the night.  Even though RQS and I chatted later on, the night was over, and I went to sleep a bit earlier than usual. 

 

I was afraid I'd have to get my ear piercings redone - a short post

 

I bought the above jewelry in Hawaii, and it looks better on me than in this photo.  You'll notice that the earrings are for pierced ears.  Unfortunately, I hadn't worn any earrings in over a week and a half and I had trouble getting the hooks into the holes in my earlobes and gave up before going to dinner.

Getting my ears pierced was a big thing for me, as I had been afraid for a long while of the consequences of doing this.  Having studs in my ears would be obvious while presenting as Mario, and I didn't want anyone asking any questions.  I had thought about getting my ears pierced when I first started to go out as Marian, yet didn't do so.  A job that paid well could have been at risk, and the display of ear jewelry could have made my then bosses uncomfortable with me.  As it was, I was already on their hit list, and I was let go 10 years this coming May.

After being laid off, I was free to get my ears pierced, but still afraid to do so.  What would people think?  It took me another few years before I said "F**k It!" and stopped caring what people will think.  If I go to see my brother, my ears are unadorned.  But if I go out as Marian, I will try to hang something pretty from my earlobes.

Luckily, after I got home from dinner, I was finally able to get the earring hooks through my earlobes.  Now, I know that I have to do this more often, so that the hole stays easy to find and use.

I met a friend today, oh boy....

 

Today's post will be a quick one, as I do not have that much to say....

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A while back, I had scheduled lunch with my friend Suzanne from the company I used to work for.  Today, we finally had another chance to get together and chat about what is going on in our lives.

Suzanne was a little late, as she was catching up on things that piled up on her in the morning. (I won't go into any details, as she has a business that she is developing.)  But when she finally arrived, the conversation flowed like water.  I told her about the "Before and After" picture in yesterday's post, but couldn't show it to her because I didn't upload it into the cloud.  I also looked for an email containing an apartment that was literally trashed, but couldn't find that one as well.  (I won't include it here, as looking at the picture makes me feel sick.)

It's always nice to talk with someone who knows that I am transgender and live in both male and female worlds.  It would be even nicer that I would have an androgynous face to go along with whatever presentation I am in, as I would like to shift more into the female mode than I am today.  And it is nice to be able to be with women who accept me for who and what I am....