I have been traveling as Marian for about a decade and much has changed in my life. For example, the woman who took this photo is no longer my friend. My long term career in computing ended, I survived a couple of breakups, and a few people close to me passed away. But the one thing I have gained is confidence. In this decade, I feel much more confident in my ability to blend in as a female. Often, people don't notice much, save for my size, when they meet me - until I let my guard down. Over time, I have become more comfortable in telling people that I am transgender, and will do so if someone asks.
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However, I am not completely happy with my current situation. Recently, I got my ears pierced so that I could wear a greater selection of earrings But this may not be enough for me. I have made a promise to RQS that I will keep - no significant body modifications while we are in a relationship. I will trade progress on my path towards living as a female for the love of a caring woman.
But what can I do that this woman could accept?
Right now, I'm thinking of either getting hair transplants to deal with my male pattern alopecia. Maybe some partial facial feminization surgery after that. And then, I'd want to get my name changed so that my official id would have a picture of me with an androgynous hair style. This way, people who need to do a casual inspection of my id wouldn't notice much if I were dressed as a male or female. The big issue is what to do with my chest. Do I want to deal with having breasts and risk a relationship? If I were to go to that next step, I'd get "permission" from a partner, as she'd have to live with me and my new "rack". This and more would be subjects for thought as I get older.
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This path of feminization has been a long one, and I wonder what the next decade will bring me....
