Showing posts with label Emotional Drain. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Emotional Drain. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 23, 2024

A visit to an old friend

 


Now back from my cruise, I couldn't wait to again present as Marian.  So, the first thing I did was to go into my closet and pick out a dress to wear.  And with one or two minor exceptions, I've been doing that for the past week.  So, it was only natural for me to get myself made up to go with RQS and visit Pat.

But first....

RQS needed to buy a new refrigerator. This was a perfect excuse to go across the river to both see Pat and to buy her refrigerator.  But one thing had to be considered: Both RQS and I like to get moving late in the day, and we didn't know whether Pat would be up to seeing us.  (We should also have considered the weather, as the weatherman predicted heavy rain for late in the day, and it came as scheduled.)

Around 4:00 pm, we left the apartment, and it was off to Rockland county to buy the refrigerator.  After a quick search, RQS found a cheap ice box to replace the decade+ old one in her kitchen.  (Her landlord refuses to replace the old one that is about to die, and she doesn't want to antagonize him - she has a below market rate apartment and wants to keep it.)  Within 15 minutes of entering the store, she had purchased a refrigerator to be delivered next week.

Before I go on too long, I must note one of the more annoying things about Pat.  She is often a leech.  When on a previous visit, we suggested taking her out for pizza, and she wangled us into taking her "boyfriend" along.  She noted that she has found a few friends to take her out into the neighborhood to go to places such as Starbucks.  We knew that she'd try to wangle us into taking her out to dinner, so we decided to first go to dinner before going to see Pat.

After "Having it our way" (you can guess what and where we ate), we met pat at her care home, and we took her out to Starbucks - just not the one she's accustomed to going.  Instead of the one less than a mile away from home, I figured that we'd take a little drive and go to one 15 minutes away.  This was a mistake, as Pat got into her routine of being a perpetual victim, blaming others for her misfortunes.  She was deathly afraid of the results of the recent presidential debate, and we couldn't distract her from this topic no matter how much we tried.  And then, when we wanted to talk about our recent Norway cruise (where we were awestruck by the scenery), she got on her high horse by inferring that the only good tourism is to get to know the people as if one were being invited into their homes. She was on her self righteous horse, and there was no way she could see that other people have different (and correct to them) perspectives on the world.  Neither of us could wait until the rain broke a bit to take her home.  And that's what we did when the rain eased off.

On our way home, RQS and I ruminated about our visit.  We both were depressed following our visit, knowing that Pat's attitude is why we don't visit more often.  Being an erratic emotional blood sucker makes a visit with Pat a 50/50 bet.  When she's "up", the visit is enjoyable.  When she's "down", the visit is unbearable.  No wonder why RQS and I rarely see Pat - we don't want to risk ruining days that often....

Bermuda Cruise 2024 #2 - Sea Day # 2 (11/01/24)

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