Getting back to "Normal" - some thoughts about normal

 

In less than 2 weeks, I'll be on the first cruise to Bermuda for the year.  So, one of the things I have to do is pack for the cruise.  Since this cruise is being taken as Mario 😒, I won't be able to dress up nice to have a good photo taken of RQS and I together.  At least, I have almost 2 weeks' of clothes for my male presentation that I can pack in advance, as I don't wear them that often anymore.

Given that the first of the two cruises will be taken on MSC, RQS will get a chance to see why I'm ambivalent about taking cruises on this line after the treatment we've gotten used to on Princess and NCL. Do I think RQS will enjoy the cruise?  Yes.  Or, I wouldn't have decided on taking this trip.  However, I think that she, like myself, will use MSC only for inexpensive getaways.  There will be one benefit of us taking this first trip to Bermuda, followed by another one several weeks later - I can ask the pier personnel whether my "sister" would have problems getting back on the ship, showing her male, legal ID.

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Recently, my brother has prodded me to take care of paperwork required to get our dad's birth certificate.  When I went down to NYC to get dad's birth certificate, I found that I had to mail in the application, and not pick it up in person.  AARGH!  One of the tasks I'll be taking care of today is filling out the paperwork, sending in a copy of my birth certificate, dad's death certificate, and a check for $45 to cover NYC's paperwork charges.  Hopefully, we will get a quick response on this, as I'd like to get this over and done with soon.

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The other day, I started to notice a small gap forming between the caulking on the tub and the tiles on the bathroom wall nearest the bathtub's hot and cold faucets.  Today, I applied new caulk to fill in the gap, and hopefully keep things from getting worse for a while.  If in the future I need to do more about this, I may call in Bath Fitter to take care of all plumbing related issues.  At that time, I'll put in a liner over the bathtub area to make it look new, a new toilet, and a new vanity/sink combination.  After this, I'll take care of installing a new medicine cabinet and I will have an up-to-date bathroom.  (There goes another bucket list vacation!)

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Next week, I will have to park my car on the street outside my apartment complex, as we are getting our driveway resealed and restriped.  I have to make sure that I am home early enough one night, so that I don't have to walk far to my car the next morning.

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If there is one thing I can say to my trans friends out there it would be: Being able to be your true self doesn't eliminate the day to day problems from your life. Instead, it allows you to focus on the solution to those problems with one less distraction.

Little things of note to me - a short note

 

As I write this, RQS is coming up by train, and I won't have much time to write later.  Right now, I am the proud resident of a mess.  It's hard to get my place uncluttered without help.  And even if I get it uncluttered, there is still so much to do.  For example, I just had tile and wall work done in the bathroom due to water damage from the shower.  What I didn't notice before is that due to shifting of the tub over the years, is that I've notices an area that needs re-caulking to prevent future issues from occurring.  While I'm at it, there are some areas that need to be re-grouted.  There goes one weekend day!

But it's not just one thing, it's the multitude of things that have fallen through the cracks and have to be taken care of.  My TV in the living room will need to be replaced, and that forces me to ask a question: Do I want to get rid of an old entertainment center (which I like, and once cost a lot) to both have more wall space and allow me to buy a larger TV.  This would make it possible for me to consider getting new carpet.  But first, I'd have to purge a lot of things from this place.  And then, it would need its first paint job in years.

Yet, it's the little things that bother me most, as I can't make enough headway in eliminating the little gatherings of clutter around the place.  Each time I empty a basket of unsorted items, I have a new one to deal with.  At least, I can say that I'm on top of my bills....

New Year's Day has come and gone - What a Relief!

 

Normally, I am more relaxed after a weekend with RQS.  Today, I am both relaxed and a bit nervous, but for reasons I'll explain in the coming paragraphs.

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This weekend started off by RQS taking the train up to Croton.  RQS noted that the train was busier than usual, the train being crowded with people trying to get out of town early so that they would have more time at home over the weekend.  We decided to pick up some stuff from the supermarket and then go home for the night.  Before we got comfortable, my next door neighbor detected a small of cooking gas in the hall.  So I told them to contact our superintendent first, in order to avoid getting the fire department involved.  (They'd look to shut off the gas if the problem couldn't be resolved quickly, and that would be the worst thing to happen on a holiday weekend.)  Luckily, he was still on site, and one tenant shut off his stove.  Whew!  That was enough excitement for the weekend!  But it was not over yet.

Saturday came, and RQS was taking a bath.  My downstairs neighbor came to my door to tell me that water was leaking from his ceiling.  So I rushed to do two things: Get RQS out of the bath, in case she had overfilled the tun, and (2) Sent an email off to the managing agent to request that this issue be investigated.  Since this is a problem that could be fixed with time and money, I was not alarmed.  But I was very upset - especially, since RQS didn't realize how high she could safely fill the tub without problems.

After I had a chance to shower and dress (as Marian), it was off to Yonkers for a New Year's Eve party being held by the host and the hostess of our game night meetup.  It was nice to be able to introduce RQS to this group, as I'd like to have her with me on occasion when I go to play games with the group.  Hopefully, this will not affect my relationship with other people in the group.

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Sunday came, and the two of us slept until 11 am.  It was nice to have RQS by my side, as both of us seem to have deeper sleeps when we're together.  I was nervous, as I had no control over the aforementioned bath tub situation, and no progress could be made until Tuesday at best.  Although it was New Year's Day, it felt more like a typical Sunday than usual.  So we were surprised when we found that Trader Joe's was closed for the day.

It seems as it the two of us are more relaxed when we are together.  In the past, I might have chewed off RQS's head for (possibly) overfilling the bath tub (and losing her love in the process), I stayed completely calm over the weekend so far.  Yes, I was a bit nervous about what might happen in the next few days.  But I knew that the issue with my neighbor was something I could take care of with money and a little time - I just had to make sure that my neighbors knew that whatever happened was totally unintentional, and something that none of us could have foreseen.

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New Year's Day (Observed) came, and it felt more like a Sunday than Sunday did.  Time flows strangely when one is retired, and the rest of the world is observing a holiday.  This was a day which we didn't do very much, save to go out food shopping for something to have in the evening.

I still felt a bit of dread, knowing that anything could happen the next day.  The worry about what will happen with the bathroom and its plumbing came and went several times, and all I could do was to try and put things out of my mind for a while.  Although RQS suggested that the next day would be a Marian day, I knew this would not be the case.  Instead, we chose to relax and watch YouTube videos until getting tired and going to bed.

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Today, RQS had to go home.  We got up and got dressed early, as we didn't know when someone would come knocking at my door to look at things.  However, our managing agent may be slow walking things (I don't know what's going on with him), as out superintendent told us that he knew about the issue and was looking for a time that everyone would be available for the plumbing inspection.AARGH!  This could have been a Marian day after all!

Well, I drove RQS to the station and I went home to relax. Later, RQS called me to let me know that PBS was airing "An Evening with Groucho", the Frank Ferrante one man show.  Even though I had seen this show in person with Vicki, it was nice to see it again on TV.  RQS and I then discussed how we could go and see this show in person, and it looks like we may be able to see it in June. ("Hooray for Captain Spaulding" is now an earworm for me.)  Hopefully, we'll get tickets for that soon.