I wish my real life family could have been like the Addams' Family. They all were able to show love, manage their own lives, deal with adversity, and be their authentic selves. Instead, we did not demonstrate love, were poor at managing our own lives, had a hard time dealing with adversity, and could not be our authentic selves.
- - - - - -
Today, I spent the first half of the day doing nothing, then drove to Long Island to see my father. This visit was much more rewarding than usual, as some family "secrets" were revealed that needed to be revealed.
I didn't get moving towards Long Island until 2:00 or so. And my first stop was at Stew Leonard's to get lunch. Normally, I'd pick up a fresh Lobster Roll and something to drink. But I thought the $3.99 Shrimp Roll special was good from Sunday through Wednesday, when it was only good on Tuesday this week. So I picked up a Pastrami wedge and finished it before continuing on my way.
Normally, I'd have continued along Route 87 until I reached the Cross County Parkway, then headed South to either the Throggs Neck or Whitestone Bridge. Instead, I made a major time-wasting decision - I decided to take the Triboro Bridge to Long Island, then the Grand Centrap Parkway to the Long Island Expressway to reach my dad's nursing home. This more than doubled my time on the road, as I was stuck in traffic almost all the way to Roslyn.
When I got to my dad, we went downstairs to the lobby to chat for an hour. My dad gave me the heads up on what was happening in my brother's life. Of course, I told him what was happening with me and GFJ. Although there is no way that I'll tell my dad that I'm TG, I did say that some of the issues we're having have been there since the beginning of the relationship, and that others are communication related. That was both true and protective of GFJ's privacy. Since my brother told me to call him when I was leaving my dad, I did so, and we agreed to meet at his office. Originally, he thought we had enough time to get to Flushing for an Oriental dinner, but he had a 7:30 appointment he had to make. So it was a quick dinner down the block from his office.
The first thing my brother did when we sat down to eat was to show me a video of a burning house. Last night, around 1 am, his fire company rushed to a nearby house on fire and extinguished the fire before it burnt down the house. He explained that the fire was in the basement, and if it was able to find a form of "chimney" for its burning gases to escape, the house would have had no chance of surviving. Luckily, the firefighters were able to get in the house and drown the fire with (as he put it) less than a minute of margin. Any later, and the fire would have escaped the basement and totalled the house. Next, the two of us started talking about events in our lives. My brother has family problems related to issues from two codependent addicts. It is not pretty. But it has allowed him to get to know his only daughter even better AND to enjoy the time he has left with her before she gets married and starts living in Europe. All too early, dinner had to end, and I was back home in roughly 60 minutes.
2 comments:
When I head to the Island my first choice is often the Throgs Neck, followed by the Whitestone with the Triboro the last choice. I get as far east as fast as I can although the traffic in Queens, Nassau and the Bronx can always be a nightmare.
Pat -
I tend to take the Throggs Neck and Whitestone bridges as a first choice. Unfortunately, I made a mistake that day, a mistake I won't make again for a long while.
Soon, I will decide (on a whim) to visit my mother's grave. It's something I've rarely done, and will do only because I'll be outlet shopping on Long Island. Of course, I'll be en-femme for this trip, as the stores I'll be looking at cater to women.
M
Post a Comment