As I write this, I've been thinking of people I have known, wondering what they would think if they were around to see me now. Most of my friends, family and acquaintances likely had no idea I am a TG. But I can say that for most of my life I wouldn't have thought so either.
My wife may have thought that this was a harmless little kink, as long as I didn't go outside while in women's clothing. I wonder what she'd think now, as I maximize the time I present as a female and minimize the amount of time I present as a male. The one time she objected to me wearing women's clothing was on our wedding night. I think she wanted to be sure of her role in our relationship.
Before my wife and I got married, I kept a promise to my late friend Carol. I feel that Carol may have been a lonely person, as I don't remember her talking about her friends. She was the stepmother of a woman I once dated, and I am grateful that this woman and I never hit it off. Carol opened a letter I addressed to the stepdaughter, and we ended up in contact with each other, building up a friendship that lasted until Carol died. So, when I kept my promise, I brought my (then) future wife with me to Carol's grave for an introduction.
Bill was my best friend through college, and was the best man at my wedding. I never felt comfortable talking with him about this side of me, and now there is no chance to do so. Recently, his email address was disconnected (his private domain expired with no renewal), and he hasn't responded to any texts sent to him. Given that he survived a brain aneurysm a few years ago, I wouldn't doubt that another similar issue caused him to be totally disabled or have killed him.
Prior to meeting XGFJ, I had dated two women named Linda. One accepted the fact that I enjoyed wearing women's clothes, but there was no chemistry between us. (It didn't help that I didn't have a CPAP unit yet, and was very noisy when sleeping.) Would she have accepted seeing me dressed? I'm not sure. But I know that the other Linda would not have been able to accept this. She was looking for someone more successful and more traditional in nature.
Strangely enough, I think that my mom would have been accepting of me as Marian. But that's because I think she always wanted a daughter. My father on the other hand would have had trouble doing so. During the last few years of his life he was resistant to change, and even had a Trump sticker on his car's bumper.
Enough of thoughts of people from my past. I'm living in the now, and visit my past sparingly while looking forward to the future.
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