A quick thought on gender presentation

 

The more I go out as Marian, the more I want to wear clothes that identify me as female.  The above dress is something I saw on Target's site that I like.  However, I will likely not buy this dress, as my closet is already overflowing.

Unlike many women, I enjoy wearing dresses all year round.  Yes, I know that cisgender women do not like wearing dresses in the winter, so I switch to shirts/blouses/sweaters and trousers for the cold weather. As I've said before, my goal is to blend in with women as a woman as best as possible.  So far, I do so more often than not, as evidenced by a recent incident where a woman changed her top in front of me.  If she thought I was a guy in a dress, she'd have waited until the bathroom was free to do so.

Over time, I am hoping that I am able to perfect my female presentation, so that most cisgender women would never think that I was anything but a cisgender woman.  However, I want to retain my ability to present as a male when I need to - such as in affairs of romance.  Ideally, I'd have an androgynous body, and be able to switch between modes as I see fit.  Until then, I'll do what I can to perfect who I am in Marian Mode....

Thinking about my weekend....

I don't miss scenes like that above.  Part of me feels sorry for the person in the picture, and part of me feels revulsion at the same time.  And this is what I've encountered lately when I've taken the subway - at least one derelict has made each of my excursions underground less pleasant since I've met RQS.  So, I don't mind driving her home at the end of each weekend, as I want for her day to start off in a pleasant way.

But enough of the subway for now....

RQS came up this past weekend and we went car shopping.  Specifically, we drove to Goshen to talk with a salesman at a dealership which had a couple of cars I was interested in.  This drive had its share of problems, as we encountered a traffic jam at a traffic circle in Bear Mountain state park.  So we decided to bail, and take the long scenic way to Route 17 instead of risking a problem on the other side of the mountain.  This was a fortuitous decision, as we got to see a side of the park I've never seen before.  When we reached the road that I expected to use to reach Route 17, it was closed.  So, we continued on the road towards Sloatsburg and reached Route 17 just short of the Red Apple Rest. 

Before I go on, I want to mention something about the Red Apple Rest.  In its heyday, it was an important "pit stop" along the "old" route to the Catskills.  However, with more people taking the Thruway, this establishment was left for locals to patronize.  Sadly, there was not enough business for this place to survive, and the ruins of this place stand along the road where a once thriving business once stood.

Once we passed the Red Apple Rest, it was off to the dealership.  And then, the "fun" began.  I was interested in both the Hyundai Kona and the Elantra, and was willing to take either model at the price the internet sales person said they'd accept.  However, the Kona I wanted was gone, and all that was coming in was a more expensive trim package that I didn't want to pay for.  So I mentioned the Elantra. The sales person mentioned that it was a different type of car, and I understood that. He presented me with a couple of offers, and the last one was acceptable.  But I needed a little time to think on it, as the car's color was not what I wanted.  I said that I'd get back to him by Monday, and I hope that we can work things out - as the cash price is not an issue anymore.

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On the way home, we decided to finish off some leftovers from the day before.  As we passed through Ossining, I spotted the Lobster Truck on its way back home.  Luckily, Shoprite is having a lobster sale next week, and we'll be feasting on crustaceans when she's here next.

Happy Independence Day!

 

The above is a shot from an Independence Day celebration at West Point, NY.  The shot does not do the display justice.  But then, I'm not in the mood to spend my time for an entry today, when I can be enjoying the rest of my weekend.

so....

Happy July 4th!

A quick post: Weekend plans - cars and lobsters

 

Originally, RQS was planning on spending Friday night with one of her friends, and then spend the rest of the weekend with me.  Well, her friend had to cancel, and I had an extra night with her.  And again, I'll be picking her up in Marian Mode....

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Friday night's plans would be simple.  Pick her up at the train station, and go out for Greek food.  (Pizza is contraindicated for her due to potassium levels.)  However, Saturday would be a day to look forward to, as the lobster truck would be in Peekskill.  Guess where one of our stops will be....

Once done with the lobster, it'll be off to the car dealership.  If I get a good offer, I'll put a deposit down on a car, and see what I need to do to get the old car off my hands.  Part of me is tempted to keep the old car for driving to RQS's neighborhood and staying the night - no one will bother stealing a 9 y/o car, nor will there be much value in doing so.  But I can always take the train to see her, as I wouldn't be dealing with the headaches of finding parking in her area.

Assuming things go well, Sunday might be another lobster feast day.  It's on sale at the local supermarket from Sunday thru Saturday, so we might just pig out a second time with some home cooked lobsters.  Sadly, she'll have to go home too soon.  But that's just a minor headache we deal with in our relationship.

I don't have much to say today....

 

Over the past few days, I haven't had the chance to do much of anything or talk to anyone.  About the only things I have the energy or time to do during the week is to go shopping for necessities, and maybe do some laundry.  If it weren't for my belief that I should write something every day, even if it is a short paragraph, I'd switch to weekly entries.  But I'm afraid that I sill wouldn't have much to say.

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Right now, it looks like only one car dealership that is interested in cutting a deal I would find acceptable. If this doesn't work out, I'll put money into keeping my 9 y/o car on the road for another year, and take my chances buying a car next year.

My brother calls me up because he is bored with home life.  I won't go into his issues, save that he finds his time at the office a validation of the person he has become.  He has sacrificed a lot to get where he is, and he soon will grab his gold ring if all goes as expected.  Hopefully, all will go well for him.

Next year, I'm planning on taking a Panama Canal cruise.  I have only two requirements: (1) that I can visit my uncle in California at cruise end, and (2) that this cruise goes through the old locks.  Given the heat and humidity, this will be a cruise taken as Mario.  Yes, it's a compromise, but one I'm willing to take if I can see my uncle at the end.

Little things can mean a lot....

 

I have found these cords to be quite helpful, as I like to wear my id badge from work on a lanyard.  When I need to open up my locker, the cord extends, so that I can open the locker, and retracts when I take the key out.  Unfortunately, the retracting on my old lanyard broke and I couldn't find the other replacements I bought last year.  So, over to Staples I went to pick up some supplies.

Before reaching Staples, I stopped by Lowe's to pick up some black duct tape to fix an issue with my cell phone case.  (I won't even try to explain it, but the plastic shield that allows a license to be visible was coming out of its place, and I wanted to secure it for good.  Next was my stop at Staples, where I bought a couple of badge reels.

It's amazing how little things like this can make life more livable....

- - - - - -

Thinking of little things, RQS will be coming up for the weekend.  Why do I phrase it that way?  Well, she's shorter than most of the women I've dated, and she makes me feel good when she's around.

One of the things that gets both of us salivating is when the "Lobster Truck" is in a place where we can get a Connecticut Roll or two.  Yum!   To us, it's like letting a kid loose in a candy store.  But this time, we're adults and a penny candy won't do it for us any more.

On the phone tonight, she asked whether the dresses I ordered from Target have arrived.  I told her that they are expected here in a couple of days.  Hopefully, this summer, she'll spend a day with me (in Marian Mode) while I'm enjoying the comfort of one of these dresses.

- - - - - -

I find it interesting how mundane my life has become as of late.  Many of the things I write about have little to do with being transgender.  Instead, they have to do with the little things in life - and they often end up meaning much more than we think at the time.  And I'm enjoying the little things right now - they mean a lot to me.

 

I keep getting closer to buying a car....

 

One of the problems I have living between the two genders is that I have to change gender presentations before doing something which requires me to present in the other gender.  In this case, it's showing myself in person as a male after spending a day at work as a female.

Why is this important?

I have to take time to strip off all traces of a female presentation, clothing, makeup, etc., switch money and ID into my other wallet, and getting dressed as a male, and this costs me at least 30-45 minutes of time which I could use getting to a dealership to do a test drive.  So I've had to hold off my test drives for times which I'll be presenting as a male - such as when RQS is with me over the weekend.  This has slowed down my search for a new car.

Recently, I decided to go online to get car quotes from dealerships.  Of course, they want you to deal with humans and give up control of the negotiation process.  Well, I figured that I'd state what was not acceptable in an offer to me, and see what they'd say.  This technique has allowed me to get quotes of $1500-$3000 less than what I was getting in person.  Yes, this still can unravel when I get to a dealership, but it has much more promise than going between dealerships in person.

Of course, I have a very good reason for buying a new car.  The last thing I need to do is have a car break down on me while I'm in female mode, as I carry my legal identification (identifying me as a male) with me. This has happened once, and I don't want it to happen again....