I haven't been doing much as Marian these days. It's not because I don't want to take the time to prepare myself to use my feminine presentation these days. Instead, it's because the both the weather and the pandemic has reduced the number of opportunities I have to go outdoors. As a result, my "normal" tendency to shift to a nocturnal sleep pattern hasn't been arrested, and I found myself going to sleep "last night" around 8 am this morning.
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The ex girlfriend and I have had some limited email exchanges as of late. After we aired out things, our recent communications have been friendly, but guarded. I'm not sure of how much either of us can open up to each other given our past. But I will admit that I miss our old and frequent communication - does she miss it as well? Neither of us should live in the past. But is there enough there for a good friendship?
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As I write this, my nephew and his girlfriend will be soon returning home to the "left coast". They are both in their mid 20's, so I think that if they catch the virus, that they will survive it with only mild symptoms. Even though the airline industry claims that their planes' HEPA filtered air is "safe", I have to be a little skeptical of their claims. Now that I have my nephew's email address, I can touch base with him after he's back home.
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My friend Vicki has been very busy lately. Today we had a short exchange of texts regarding a dress that interested me. Given its price point and material quality, it fascinated me. But we both agreed that it would drape poorly on me, and that it would be a waste of my money. Other dresses looked like a better option for me. But I think I still need to fill in the gaps in my wardrobe (tops, bottoms) more than just buying things for the sake of buying them.
Since Vicki has dropped a size, she'll be bring me some hand me downs to try on this week. This gives me a strong incentive to clean up much of the clutter in my place, so that it won't be an embarrassment to me to have people over here again.
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2020
has been a very bad year for me, and I'm glad it's over for
me. I let my apartment go wild, and I need to clean up a lot of the
clutter that has accumulated. Every attempt to declutter things has
only ended in disaster. I guess it is the low grade depression being
multiplied by being lonely that has affected me this way, and manifested
itself in an excessively cluttered space. So 2021 will be a year for
me to work on this.
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I decided to make my kitchen look a little more comfortable than it has looked for the past 35 years. I have a storage cabinet that stands on the floor and can provide extra counter space for work, or to place appliances. Since my wife moved into the apartment, it has always been placed in a way to effectively narrow the entrance to the kitchen. Simply moving the cabinet to stand against an adjacent wall had some benefits: (1) It forced me to clean up some of the garbage that has been hidden for years, (2) It opened up the kitchen and made it more inviting, and (3) It gave me more effective use of the space in the kitchen - it allowed me to move my vacuum sealer into a corner, while making it easier for me to access my toaster oven.
Once I got this task started, I noticed years of gunk that had accumulated on the ceiling fan. So, I took some paper towels and removed most of the gunk. (I'll save a thorough cleaning for another day, as I'll want sunlight to get a better idea of how much work I need to do for that cleaning.) And then, I realized that I had mixing bowls which had been stored on top of my cabinets which likely had 25 years of gunk on them. Since it was a "you might as well" task, I decided to find a step stool and give each of these bowls a thorough cleaning before putting them back on the cabinets. Once they dried, I put these bowls in large, clear plastic bags, so that the gunk will go on the bags, and not on the bowls. (Note to myself: If I ever do a complete kitchen remodel, go with cabinets that reach the ceiling, so that kitchen gunk stays on the outside.)
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Parting with things is very hard for me, but I think I'm going to finally clean out my downstairs storage compartment. While doing this, I plan to get rid of my vinyl collection. There are over 600 albums in the collection, and I haven't played any of them in years. There are boxes of books downstairs that I could also give away. Until places are accepting books for charitable donations, I will have to wait to dispose of them. I wonder what else is in my storage compartment that I can get rid of.
Once I clean out the storage compartment, I will move most of my unused, seasonal wardrobe into the basement. While I do this, I will ask Vicki what she thinks of each piece, and determine whether I should donate the clothing to charity, keep it for future use, or pitch it into the dumpster. Most cisgender women do not have as large a wardrobe as I have, and I want to pare it down to pieces that I will use often, and on a regular basis.
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Every time I go in my freezer and do a deep dive, I always seem to find food which has been frozen for too long, and that has to be tossed into the dumpster. As a result, I will develop a plan to minimize the opportunities for this to happen again, and then gradually use up the good food left in the freezer. Once there is enough room in my freezer, I plan to start buying some pre-made meals
again. I plan to finally cancel my Freshly subscription instead of
resuming it. In its place, I plan to go back to Top Chef Meals, and buy
10 meals at a time. To do this, I need freezer space. And it's a good
time to start cooking the food I put in the freezer over the past year.
I guess I'll learn how to cook a little, so that I don't have to cook
that much.
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Since politics has been a major part of most people's lives as of late (and will be until Biden takes office), I'll be glad when each day's news focuses more on the usual murders, fires, car crashes, and other disasters that befall us, instead of what our current president has/has not done to create chaos in our lives. Should we need to worry because a president leaves town without signing a needed Covid relief bill? No. But this is typical of a sociopathic 7 year old in a 74 year old body. And I'm very tired of his tantrums, and want him gone from the news.
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I figure that's enough for now. Yes, many of these items are things I've covered before. But as long as they have some importance to me, I will keep mentioning them....
