Socializing in the age of the pandemic

There is a certain loneliness in the above picture that I can not define.  Is it that of these boats waiting to be used?  Or is it that humanity looks so far away in the scene?  Either way, this image is a fitting metaphor for what is happening in the age of the pandemic.

- - - - - -

In Mid March, everything seemed to stop all at once.  Within less than a week, public activity went from "drive" to "park" - and the social engine was left to idle for several months.  It took New York State (with the exception of New York City) 3 months to "flatten the curve" to a level where most socializing could return to a new "normal".  Outside the city, restaurants were allowed to reopen indoor dining rooms at 50% of capacity, museums were allowed to  reopen with social distancing protocols in place, and public gatherings of 50 people (or less) were allowed to take place.  The isolation of those 3 months has put a fear into people which will be hard to remove when a vaccine for the Coronavirus is found. 

I've noticed that several meetup groups have reverted to online Zoom gatherings, as their members are still afraid of meeting in person.  However, the meetup group I've attended in person is maintaining social distance for its in person meetings, and I expect it to shut down for the winter when it is no longer feasible to meet outside.  I'll miss that venue.  But I'll find ways to get by.

- - - - - -

Even in NYC, I see gradual signs of reopening.  Some museums have developed protocols which will allow them to admit visitors again.  This is a good thing.  All too many people are acting out of fear than anything else.  However, this is a good thing when we don't yet have a vaccine for the virus.

In the South and West, the virus is still out of control. The Zoom meetup from Texas that I attend shows no sign of going away.  Ever since the virus starting spiking there, my pen pal friend is more reluctant to go out of her apartment.  (I can't say this for the rest of the group.) And the rest of the gang has gotten so used to these virtual meetups, that I don't think they will abandon this way of socializing anytime soon.

Over time, I expect that people in the South and West will see enough suffering that they will also get comfortable with the idea of another economic shutdown.  They will not like being told that they can't go to bars, restaurants, theaters, and other venues where people get together in close quarters.  But they will do so eventually - when the pain from having reopened their economies too soon gets too much to bear.

- - - - - -

You might ask - how is this affecting me?  Well, due to problems with an ex girlfriend, I will not be able to attend virtual meetings of "her" dinner group.  I can live with that, because I have developed other ways to meet my needs to connect with people in case of another stay at home order.  Luckily, I live in the Northeast, where the virus is being kept at bay. This means, I will be free to travel when my gig at the census ends sometime this year. Although I am limited to driving to some place in the Northeast, it's better to be able to do this now, than worry about being quarantined in the future.

Yet, the pandemic is affecting me more in subtle ways.  For example, I've never been able to hold the woman I've been seeing in my arms.  She lives inside NYC limits, and I have to drive her to Long Island, so that we can dine "normally".  People who would normally respond quickly to communications inside a dating platform are a little reluctant to do so, as they know that dating itself will be awkward until they have been vaccinated for the virus. 

As my readers know, I enjoy cruising.  Since Hawaii seems to have gotten the virus under control, it may be possible for New Yorker's to visit there without a mandatory 14 day quarantine. If this is the case, it might still be possible for me to take my Hawaiian cruise this winter.  Hopefully, this will be the case.  I really want to get Lei'ed in Hawaii soon!

- - - - - -

For the most part, all of this could have either been avoided, or the impact of this could have been much less severe.  We have our president and his GOP loyalists to blame.  We paid attention to science in the Northeast, paid the price to "flatten the curve" and are relatively virus free.  Outside the Northeast, they tended to follow the proclamations of power hungry politicians and reopened things way too soon.  As a result, residents of 31 states (as of this writing) must quarantine themselves if they enter New York.  If the Northeast was a separate country, we'd be able to visit most of the world, as our infection rates are as low as Canada, the UK, and most of the EU.  But this is not the case - we get hurt because the rest of America is not acting responsibly.

Hopefully, enough people will be sick and tired of the mess we are in, and vote the current dysfunctional regime out on November 3rd.  Then, starting January 20th at noon, we can get to the business of ridding this country of this virus, so that we can get back to normal living....

Opening up from Quarantine

This dress is something I picked up from Catherine's, thinking it would be  perfect for summer. I sent a copy of the picture above to Vicki #1, and she said it looked great.  What do you think?

- - - - - -

Unfortunately, I wore the dress to work the other day. So I settled on wearing another outfit to work that I bought at the same time - an aqua gauzy shirt, with a breezy patterned skirt with aqua as its dominant color.  (Sorry I didn't get a picture of it before going to work.)  And this is what I wore before dinner with Vicki in Connecticut.

As virtually everyone is aware, the recent Quarantine has gotten in the way of everyone's lives.  My former girlfriend has had to make major changes in how she runs her small business, and she no longer has the physical endurance she had before contracting the virus and having places where she could regularly pursue her favorite exercise routines.  As for me, I've tried to go for walks on the days I have free from work, and am gradually building up the endurance I'll need to go on hikes with meetup groups in the region.

Back to dinner with Vicki.... 

We had different, but compatible, reasons for "chancing" this dinner.  I figured that going out in the early stages of reopening would result in the least risk of catching the virus before the second wave hits.  She believes that we must get back to living our lives, knowing that this wave will come, and that the hospitals should not be overrun with new admissions, now that the first wave has passed.  Both are likely to be true.  And I'm also at the point where where I think we should gradually reopen the economy until the second wave hits - then deal with that wave when it comes.

Our first problem was choosing a place to eat.  We needed an inexpensive place which had outdoor seating.  This meant looking through all of the options available to us in a google search, specifically noting "outdoor dining" as a requirement.  And we settled on Southwest Cafe in Ridgefield, CT as our choice.  Our next problem was seating.  We had to be sure to get a seat when we arrived.  The place took no reservations, but noted that they never reached their capacity limits. And the third, but minor, problem was my work schedule - I  got out of work at 5:30,. This left us a short time to make it to the restaurant on time to enjoy a leisurely meal.

Of course, it would have been easy for me to have stayed late at work.  As a non-manager, I am prohibited from doing so. This made it ethically possible to rush out the door at 5:30 and head over to Vicki's.  After picking up the money I'd need for the night, I had to take Route 129 to Vicki's and pass by the Croton Dam Park area.  In one sense, I'm glad that they have closed the park - the "tourists" will be taking their walks elsewhere.  However, we still see people wanting to talk with the cops policing the entrances, getting in the way of people (like me) who have places to go.  And yet, I made it to Vicki's by 6:00 pm.

After picking up Vicki, we got to the restaurant by 6:30, and were seated by 7:00.  Everything that came to the table was disposable - the plastic cups, the plastic tableware, napkins, plates, etc. were all disposable, according to guidance from Connecticut's department of health.  Yet, this wasn't an issue.  Both my drink and my dinner's portion size made up for everything.  I was glad to help a restaurant stay open in these hard times.  And I am looking forward to the days where Westchester will be allowed to reopen as well.

I won't go into the details of what Vicki and I discussed over dinner.  A casual reader of this blog will take things the wrong way.  But I can say that we had a great time, finally achieving some normalcy that we haven't had since Mid March.  One minor drawback was that she misgendered me in public.  It seems that I'll have to watch out for this in people now that things are returning to a new normal.  It took a long time for a former friend to get used to correctly gendering me when presenting as female, and I think that Vicki made a casual mistake of someone finally being able to relax in public for a change.

I'm Back online again!

The above picture was taken on the Old Croton Aqueduct path.  Considering how many people have been out and about, now that the nice days are here, I usually have to travel far to find nice places to walk and get back into shape.

I've decided to reopen this blog, so that I can continue to journal my life as quarantine is gradually being lifted.  At first, I won't be publishing daily posts, as I don't have that much to say.  In addition, I won't have much to say about either of my two formerly closest friends, now that bridges have been burnt.

- - - - - -

To catch the casual reader of this blog up to date, quarantine has been hell for me, as I've been dealing with grief caused by the loss (not death) of my two closest friends, the death of my father, and the virtual shutdown of my social life due to the quarantine. I won't go into details, save that anger made me a person I didn't like being, and I had to decide to let go of many things so that I could move forward with my life.

Since I don't know if my ex will read this blog or not, let's simply say that before the quarantine, I had a couple of nice dates with a nice woman, but things didn't work out.  Lately, I've had some pleasant calls with other women, and it would be nice to see them after quarantine ends. 

Work at the census bureau has started to return, and I'm still adding money to my bank account.  If all goes right, I'll have saved up enough, that by the end of the year, I can take a Hawaiian cruise.  However, this poses several interesting issues.  I want to take the 3 day land + 7 day sea cruise tour deal, but an ex girlfriend from 23 years ago will be on that cruise with 3 of her girlfriends.  Should I take it and out myself to her first?  Or, should I simply go on the cruise and say nothing?  (I'm assuming that she will not recognize me as Marian.)  I'm gambling both that the net price for this cruise will drop due to cancellations, etc., and that things will open up for cruising in the fall.

- - - - - -

So much I could say, but not the time to collect my thoughts.  More later....



.