Sometimes, it can seem overwhelming.

 

Years ago, I used this tool to generate a more feminine version of my face, given the photo on the left. As of today, I'm still far from the surgery which would turn my face into a more androgynous version of the face I see every morning.  But first, I have to lose some weight.

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With that being noted, I try to focus first on the little things I can do now that will show a positive result quickly.  So I have taken this idea and started to apply it around my apartment.  Today, I started to restore the order that I destroyed when I moved media cases out of the way for the installation of my new refrigerator. By taking the CDs out of the storage containers I had temporarily placed them, sorting them back into some sort of order, and putting them back into the media shelves where they belong.  This took the better part of 2 hours, but it was worth every minute, as I gained a square yard in my living room that was formerly used by storage containers.

It'll take a long time for me to get my apartment in the shape I want.  But, by taking the approach of doing a little at a time when I can do something, I'll gradually see results.  If I focus on all the tasks that need to be done, I'll get overwhelmed and nothing will get done.  Soon, when my money supply has been refreshed, I think about more work to be done in my bathroom.  My vanity has seen better years, and I want to install both a new vanity/sink and a new toilet.  (My current toilet is in an ugly shade of yellow, and I want my new one to be in white.)  If I can, I'll ask about new electric wiring, so that I can replace the medicine cabinet (with built in lights and electric outlet) with something that looks nice and meets both my needs and the needs of current electrical code.

Once I'm done with the "easy stuff", it will be time to tackle something more difficult - redoing my kitchen.  I'm tired of 40 y/o linoleum, as well as ugly cabinets, an ugly counter top, and a poor placement of my refrigerator.  Reworking the kitchen layout could allow me to move my oven a little, and replace it with a full sized (30") unit. The only question is when this could take place, as I will not be able to live here while much of this work goes on.

I'll focus on the little things which will make this place more comfortable.  Many of those tasks will involve eliminating the clutter that wastes space.  I'll feel sad to get rid of perfectly good furniture.  But getting rid of things that no longer serve my needs will make life much more comfortable.  And isn't that what everyone should want in old age?

A visit to see my brother

 

I don't get the chance to see my brother that often, and this was one time I knew he needed to talk with me. Without saying too much, he has both an important career decision to make and a decision that will affect his peace of mind.  So, I knew that I had to see him immediately after leaving RQS this evening.

Normally, I am not under any time constraints when leaving RQS's place, save that I have to be aware of alternate side of the street parking rules and on which side of the street my car is parked.  However, I knew I had to reach my brother's place by 5, so that we could get to dinner by 6.  Just as I was walking out the door, my brother called - and I told him I'd be there shortly.  

Arriving at my brother's place around 5, we chatted for a while, and then proceeded to a seafood restaurant in Oceanside, NY - Jordan Lobster Farms.  As much as I didn't need another big meal, it was hard to resist clams on the half shell, clam chowder, and a 1 1/2 pound lobster.  YUM!  We talked about many things:  career, family, friendships, and pastimes. We also talked about my uncle, who I will be visiting in April.  

All too soon, this visit had to end.  I drove back to my apartment to find several things on my doorstep, one of which was a pair of large door stoppers which I'll be using to keep my refrigerator door closed until I can properly level the device.  (Too bad I forgot about the shims my brother had saved for me back at his place.)  Although there was more that I could have brought in at the time, I left some stuff in the hall to retrieve in the morning.

Jelly's Last Jam

 

Jelly's Last Jam tells the story (very loosely) of Jelly Roll Morton's life, as well as his contributions to the musical form we know as Jazz.  This was one of the better revivals in City Center's Encore! series. Given that I enjoyed Jelly Roll's music, I figured that this would be an entertaining diversion for both RQS and I, and gave her tickets to see this show on Valentine's Day.

A week and a half later, we braved the cold to go to City Center.  Weekend travel on the NYC Subway system can be frustrating at times, as many lines are shut down (whole or in part) for maintenance. For us, this meant that we had to deal with a larger than normal crowd at Union Square as we made our way outside to get a bite to eat.

Now, I don't keep any of my feminine wardrobe at RQS's house.  Even though it hovered near 32°f, the wind chill made it feel worse than that. So I was very fortunate that my feminine wardrobe was not available to me, as I would have braved the cold in a nice dress with tights on my legs.  Yet, if I did, I wouldn't have been the only person wearing a dress - we saw quite a few young (and older) ladies showing off their legs while on the subway, and later at city center.

Once done with food, we took the train to 57th street and then walked over to City Center.  After picking up our tickets, we had to kill 30 minutes in the lobby before being allowed to enter the theater and proceed to our seats.  Thankfully, we were able to take the elevator to the mezzanine where we had seats.

The play was nearly 2+1/2 hours long (with intermission) and RQS was tapping her feet and moving to the rhythm throughout the play.  I loved it too, and I'm not a big fan of musicals.  (Later on, I found this review in the New York Times while on the ride home - a nice coincidence.)  However, there was one minor fly in the ointment - we weren't able to make it home in time for SNL's cold open - one of our usual Saturday Night things to watch, along with Weekend Update.  At least, we were on time for a great fake advertisement for a love doll - Fugliana.  This was not a skit for everyone, but it was one of the show's best skits of all time. We watched the show until the second musical number started - then it was off to bed for the night. 

Car Shopping - Weekend #4

Knowing me, I'd buy the above car again if it were available.  No, it's not practical by today's standards.  But it was fun to drive and a great first car.  Those days are long gone, and I have to think about what I need in a car, as I'll be using it for a long time.

Right now, my choices are a toss-up between the Honda HR-V and the Subaru Crosstrek.  Although I could see myself in the Mazda CX-30, I've ruled out that car due to the sparse dealer network in Westchester county.  (One of those dealerships ignored me when I visited, and I don't want to schlep to lower county for service.)  Surprisingly, I am leaning towards the Subaru, only because it was the one car in which I didn't bump my head getting into the car.

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Car shopping is a pain in the ass. Dealers want to haggle, as they know that customers do not know the true value of cars, nor do they have the tools/skills to strike good bargains with the dealerships.  As a result, most people would rather have a root canal than shop for a car.  I have found that when one is able to use emails to prod dealers' internet sales people to supply prices, they will do so - especially when one stands firm and refuses to come into the dealership and haggle with a professional haggler.

A couple of years ago, we were in the middle of the pandemic, and dealers could name the prices they wanted to make a deal.  It was easy for them to lie, adding fake line items such as "****** Complete" (thieving dealer name left out to avoid libel) to add $1000 profit to an MSRP deal.  Today, there is a surplus of cars on dealer lots (such as in the Yonkers lot of the dealer that ignored us).  So they are much more willing to make deals if (and only if) the potential customer controls how much information is given to the sales person at the dealership.

So, what information MUST you keep away from the salesman, and what information should you supply?  I've been going by these rules this time around:

• Do your research before going to any dealer for a test drive, so that you can specifically state which car model/trim level/options you want to test drive.  (Trim levels do not mean much in most test drives.)
• Do identify similar models/trim levels/options from other car brands, so that you can test drive those cars as well.
• Do ask for an "Out the Door" price for the desired vehicle with all costs itemized.  This should cover the car, all charges, documentation fees and registration fees for the car.
• Do NOT tell the salesman your budget for the car.  
• Do NOT tell the salesman how much you plan to pay for a car on a monthly basis.
  
• Do NOT tell the salesman whether you will finance the car or not.
• Do NOT tell the salesman whether you want to trade in a car or not.
• Do NOT tell the salesman what it would take for you to buy a car right away if asked.

Giving the salesman any information from the "Do NOT's" above will give him tools he needs to work a deal to extract as much profit for the dealership as possible, leaving less money in your pocket at the end of the day.  Ideally, one avoids salesmen altogether, as they are experts in reading body language. Thus, my preference for using emails as negotiating tools.

Will I get the car I want at the best possible price?  Who knows?  But I'm doing better this time around in getting a price I want....

Connecting with someone - A short post

 

Today's post will be short.  I had been exchanging emails with someone, and we finally had the chance to chat.  The chat was pleasant, and we will likely have lunch soon.

Why is this important?

Well, to answer that question takes time.  But I'm not going to answer it here.  Instead, I can say that this person was glad that I found someone nice in RQS, and I am glad that she has found someone nice.  It'll be a good thing when we finally meet again.

Reconnecting with people can be both a good and bad thing, depending on the types of ties that bind people together.  One person I know met up with a former roommate for a long weekend, and couldn't wait for that weekend to be over.  Other times, it's like the years that passed were like hours, and things pick up as if nothing happened in between.  In my case, it was good to reconnect.

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Lately, I've been trying to reopen things with a friend from my college days.  A lot of stuff has gone on in his life, much of it related to health and family issues.  His story reminds me of Tolstoy's opening quote from Anna Karenina:

"All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way."

With my friend, this is all too true.  I knew him to have an unhappy relationship with his parents and siblings from high school days.  Now, things are even worse.  Hopefully, things will get better from him soon.  At least, he's found a way to retire from his second career.....

The Ice Box has been delivered, and I still have a problem.

I was awake at 6:00 am for one reason only - I was to expect my refrigerator to be delivered somewhere between 7:15 am and 10:15 am.  Normally, I don't want to get up until 10:30 am, so I knew that I had to set multiple alarms to make sure I was up in time.

Not knowing when the delivery men would arrive, I had to postpone getting together with a new friend. As luck would have it, I didn't need to do this.  The delivery men came around 9:30 am.  Now, when I get a call telling me that someone is "here", I'd think they'd be in front of my doorway.  No.  They were in front of the doorway next door, and blocking a couple of cars.  Shouting out to the two men, I let them know where I was, and they proceeded to unload the refrigerator.

Given that I live up some stairs, they wanted to get the hard job of bringing the refrigerator to my floor before removing the old device.  This wasn't much of a problem.  But it was a problem getting the old refrigerator out of the apartment, and the new one into the apartment. Yet, with a little elbow grease and taking a door off its hinges, this task was accomplished.  Soon enough, the new ice box was in place, and the two delivery men were on their way.

But I still had a problem....

The installation process did not go well - the bottom door of the ice box kept opening.  Over the years, the weight of refrigerators has helped cause the floor to shift out of being level - and I found that I'll need some shims to level the ice box.  Until then, I'll put something heavy in front of the door, and that should keep the door shut until the ice box has been properly leveled.  Too bad that I didn't buy the store's service contract - I'd be calling them back today, and having them do the leveling for me.

Later on, after a day's rest, I went out food shopping.  $100 later, I had many of the things I needed to restock the refrigerator.  And I found that the lightweight stool I used to keep the door shut wasn't working.  So, I figure that a 2 liter bottle of Snapple may help with this problem for now....

Getting ready for the new ice box

 

 
I can only imagine what it was like in the days when the Ice Man came every day to refill one's ice box.  Home mechanical refrigeration was only a dream for many people 100+ years ago.  Even now, many of us old timers still use the phrase "Ice Box" when we refer to a refrigerator.  And yet, I've been treating my cupboard as my nourishment supply until my new refrigerator is delivered.

To prepare for the new refrigerator, I have emptied almost everything I could from the old machine and tossed it.  Foodstuffs which were not opened that didn't need refrigeration for storage (i.e. Catsup) were left in the old machine to be removed in the morning.  Since the freezer was working (as of this morning), I will put those items into Styrofoam cooler chests once I get the 30 minute warning.  Virtually everything else can be taken out quickly or tossed quickly.

Luckily, I ordered a simple refrigerator - no water dispenser or ice maker.  The simpler the device is, the less that will go wrong.  That means that I should be able to expect a 12-15 year lifespan for the unit.  By that time, I will likely be moving out of this place for a home on a single level - no stairs to climb.  I expect that the old device should be out the door within 15 minutes of the truck's arrival, and that the new device should be in place 30 minutes after that.

Once the new refrigerator has been installed, I will get showered and dressed, then fill up the ice box with replacements for the stuff I had to throw out.  Hopefully, it will perform as well as the old one did.