A grab bag of things to talk about.

 

I haven't been doing much as Marian these days.  It's not because I don't want to take the time to prepare myself to use my feminine presentation these days.  Instead, it's because the both the weather and the pandemic has reduced the number of opportunities I have to go outdoors. As a result, my "normal" tendency to shift to a nocturnal sleep pattern hasn't been arrested, and I found myself going to sleep "last night" around 8 am this morning.

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The ex girlfriend and I have had some limited email exchanges as of late.  After we aired out things, our recent communications have been friendly, but guarded.  I'm not sure of how much either of us can open up to each other given our past. But I will admit that I miss our old and frequent communication - does she miss it as well?  Neither of us should live in the past. But is there enough there for a good friendship?

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As I write this, my nephew and his girlfriend will be soon returning home to the "left coast".  They are both in their mid 20's, so I think that if they catch the virus, that they will survive it with only mild symptoms.  Even though the airline industry claims that their planes' HEPA filtered air is "safe", I have to be a little skeptical of their claims.  Now that I have my nephew's email address, I can touch base with him after he's back home.

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My friend Vicki has been very busy lately.  Today we had a short exchange of texts regarding a dress that interested me.  Given its price point and material quality, it fascinated me.  But we both agreed that it would drape poorly on me, and that it would be a waste of my money.  Other dresses looked like a better option for me.  But I think I still need to fill in the gaps in my wardrobe (tops, bottoms) more than just buying things for the sake of buying them.

Since Vicki has dropped a size, she'll be bring me some hand me downs to try on this week.  This gives me a strong incentive to clean up much of the clutter in my place, so that it won't be an embarrassment to me to have people over here again.

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2020 has been a very bad year for me, and I'm glad it's over for me.  I let my apartment go wild, and I need to clean up a lot of the clutter that has accumulated.  Every attempt to declutter things has only ended in disaster.  I guess it is the low grade depression being multiplied by being lonely that has affected me this way, and manifested itself in an excessively cluttered space.  So 2021 will be a year for me to work on this.

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I decided to make my kitchen look a little more comfortable than it has looked for the past 35 years.  I have a storage cabinet that stands on the floor and can provide extra counter space for work, or to place appliances.  Since my wife moved into the apartment, it has always been placed in a way to effectively narrow the entrance to the kitchen.  Simply moving the cabinet to stand against an adjacent wall had some benefits: (1) It forced me to clean up some of the garbage that has been hidden for years, (2) It opened up the kitchen and made it more inviting, and (3) It gave me more effective use of the space in the kitchen - it allowed me to move my vacuum sealer into a corner, while making it easier for me to access my toaster oven.   

Once I got this task started, I noticed years of gunk that had accumulated on the ceiling fan.  So, I took some paper towels and removed most of the gunk.  (I'll save a thorough cleaning for another day, as I'll want sunlight to get a better idea of how much work I need to do for that cleaning.)  And then, I realized that I had mixing bowls which had been stored on top of my cabinets which likely had 25 years of gunk on them.  Since it was a "you might as well" task, I decided to find a step stool and give each of these bowls a thorough cleaning before putting them back on the cabinets.  Once they dried, I put these bowls in large, clear plastic bags, so that the gunk will go on the bags, and not on the bowls.  (Note to myself: If I ever do a complete kitchen remodel, go with cabinets that reach the ceiling, so that kitchen gunk stays on the outside.)

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Parting with things is very hard for me, but I think I'm going to finally clean out my downstairs storage compartment.  While doing this, I plan to get rid of my vinyl collection.  There are over 600 albums in the collection, and I haven't played any of them in years.  There are boxes of books downstairs that I could also give away.  Until places are accepting books for charitable donations, I will have to wait to dispose of them.  I wonder what else is in my storage compartment that I can get rid of. 

Once I clean out the storage compartment, I will move most of my unused, seasonal wardrobe into the basement.  While I do this, I will ask Vicki what she thinks of each piece, and determine whether I should donate the clothing to charity, keep it for future use, or pitch it into the dumpster.  Most cisgender women do not have as large a wardrobe as I have, and I want to pare it down to pieces that I will use often, and on a regular basis.

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Every time I go in my freezer and do a deep dive, I always seem to find food which has been frozen for too long, and that has to be tossed into the dumpster.  As a result, I will develop a plan to minimize the opportunities for this to happen again, and then gradually use up the good food left in the freezer.  Once there is enough room in my freezer, I plan to start buying some pre-made meals again. I plan to finally cancel my Freshly subscription instead of resuming it.  In its place, I plan to go back to Top Chef Meals, and buy 10 meals at a time.  To do this, I need freezer space.  And it's a good time to start cooking the food I put in the freezer over the past year. I guess I'll learn how to cook a little, so that I don't have to cook that much.

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Since politics has been a major part of most people's lives as of late (and will be until Biden takes office), I'll be glad when each day's news focuses more on the usual murders, fires, car crashes, and other disasters that befall us, instead of what our current president has/has not done to create chaos in our lives. Should we need to worry because a president leaves town without signing a needed Covid relief bill?  No.  But this is typical of a sociopathic 7 year old in a 74 year old body. And I'm very tired of his tantrums, and want him gone from the news.

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I figure that's enough for now.  Yes, many of these items are things I've covered before.  But as long as they have some importance to me, I will keep mentioning them....

 

 

 

My chewing gum lost its flavor on the bedpost overnight....

 

Believe it or not, there is a wall in Seattle which is covered with chewing gum.  Yecch!  But this wall has become one of the scenic attractions of the city.  Although the original gum is being steam cleaned from the wall, visitors will be able to apply new gum to the wall after it is cleaned.

I am envious of people who have a lot of friends who will call them up to do things.  I was never that lucky.  Even now, the consequences of being a loner all of these years has caught up with me in the age of the pandemic.  I made up for being alone by trying to attend social events open to the public, and hen traveling to places where I'd be forced to socialize a little.  Now that the pandemic has cut off those social venues, the loneliness of my life has returned.

Strangely enough, being Marian opened me up to new people and experiences.  The dispute with my ex had repercussions which may have resulted in me no longer having access to certain social venues I depended on before the pandemic hit.  Although we will always look at our dispute differently, there is much more to what happened than either of us need to discuss anymore. And belaboring the points will only hurt the two of us if we continue down that road.

There is a big part of me that misses my daily calls to two people no longer in my life.  Since I doubt that they will ever be back in my life as regular confidants, I have to make do in my own way.  But it is not as good as it was a couple of years ago.  Hopefully, things will change for the better as the pandemic recedes into history. Until then, I will try to make do and take one day at a time.

A little aside from the dating world....

 

A while back, I mentioned a conversation I had with someone interrogating me regarding my dating success and other things.  The entire conversion is posted at the bottom of this entry for your entertainment.  

Most of my female friends complain about the number of scammers trying to take advantage of them.  I have found that men seem to be attacked less frequently, but are attacked by two kinds of people: (1) The "hit and run" scammer, who messages you and tries to get in contact with you by other mediums (email, etc.) before the dating site shuts their ID down, and (2) The "interrogator" scammer, who wants a complete profile before targeting you for their next sugar daddy.  Most of the time, OK Cupid shuts the former type down after a few hours of swiping right on everyone they see.  However, they are less able to keep the latter type from bothering people.  The first time I was in contact with this type, she gave up on scamming me and cut off contact.  The conversation below is from the second type.

First, some background: This exchange took place shortly after Thanksgiving. This woman is supposedly in the catering business.  You'll note that she's hinting that I am a fake early on. And, she made a comment out of the blue regarding Black people lovable people.  What does that have to do with the conversation we're having?  Most of all, her language skills clued me on to the fact that this person is a scam artist of some type.

Enjoy!

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Hi

Nov 28 11:58pm

Hi _ hope you had a nice holiday. Hopefully, the pandemic hasn't destroyed your business. All too many people have been destroyed by the pandemic, one of my friend was $800 away from being evicted from her home in Texas.

Nov 29 7:27pm

Im still ok

Nov 29 7:47pm

Being okay in this time of the pandemic is a good thing period. One person I know is so busy because she lost an employee and is now working seven days per week. These are strange times.

Only bored

I hope you haven’t lost much of your income stream. So many people I know have been devastated

A bit

Nov 29 8:02pm

Do u travel alone

Both alone and with a partner

Lost that friend a year ago due to a nasty argument

Ohhh a lot of ladies

Nov 29 8:38pm

Can we have vedio call

Nov 29 10:15pm

Maybe tomorrow or Tuesday. Too tired tonight.

Ok why tired

How many gf since u lost ur wife

Have been on phone for 3.5 hours. 7. Over 24 years.

Ur chatting a lot

I dont chat much wasting time on fake people

But im in phone whole day

Fb u tube

Nov 29 11:57pm

Do you do zoom? We could chat in evening

Nov 30 12:10am

And yes I do chat a lot.

Nov 30 12:36am

Have u encountered fake people

Some fakes. One crazy person was criticizing me for not optimally managing my money. It was as if she wanted to scam me out of my money

Nov 30 1:01am

Ok

Do u rent or own a place

I have found that women are more victims of scammers than men. One of my female friends get hit on by scammers every day, and shares her experiences with me. It’s amazing how bad the scammers are.

I live in a co-op. It’s a nice garden apartment.

Yes

How about you?

In nyork!!!

Yup. In NY

I live with my daughter now but i have 4 houses in philippines

2 rented out

Ah

N i free for my workers

Yes

What is ur weight

U are retired

Yes, retired

Whats ur job before

Computers

Are u committed now

Single

I think black man are lovable person

Why do you think that?

They keep on sending messages

Ah

Sending flowers

Not true of all

Nov 30 1:20am

But i dont chat them

I dont talk to fake people

I dont like wasting time

Can’t blame you. I’m careful too

How long u been here in site

A few months

Ohh

I always ask vedio call

I’m not in a hurry

Actually im tired

I usually Try to meet in person for coffee first. Video calls are good, but they do not show that the person is local.

Ok bye for now

Bye

What u mean local

For example, if a person says they are from Fort Lee New Jersey, I want to meet them at a Starbucks in Fort Lee New Jersey. This way I am not getting a scammer from overseas.

Hurry is bad word for me

I am not in any rush. All too many people are.

Cos im not insisting myself to anyone

Insisting yourself to anyone?

Sent

Im not insisting myself to u

You've blocked them.

 

Now that we're past Christmas....

 

Yes, Santa is exhausted, and so was I after leaving my brother's place on Christmas.  Lately, I've been getting too little sleep, and slept later than I planned before going to see my brother for the day.

This year, I had my doubts about visiting my brother, as I am concerned about catching the virus. Considering everything, I decided to drive to Long Island to see him and his family. I was an hour later than planned, but just in time to eat.  As seems to have become a habit, my sister in law is being anti social, and only comes out of the bedroom for a few minutes before going back inside.  

It was nice to meet my nephew's girlfriend.  And when I said that I was originally planning on being in her area this year, my brother said that she comes from Seattle.  I said that I knew that, as I was going to mention a 21 day Panama Canal cruise that got canceled due to the virus.  It was a pleasant trip, but not much to say about it

 

Finally! We've made it to 2021!

 

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Yay!  2020 is finally over, and we've made it to 2021.  The first thing I want to say is that I hope that one ailing reader of this blog is still able to read it.  If anything happens to this reader, I hope that the spouse will drop me a line to let me know about things.

Last year was a very strange year.  I've written about the dispute with my ex.  But I have avoided mentioning that we've occasionally exchanged emails with each other.  My Facebook page has nothing worthwhile for her to read, and a mutual friend of ours would say that I have said nothing that references the ex there.  What I'll never tell her is that there will always be a part of me that will care for her, as both of us have likely put way too much between us to erase much of the pain from 2020.

Some of the strangeness of 2020 has to do with politics.  We've seen a president virtually go crazy, and no one from his cabinet or his political party bother to do anything about it.  We've been very lucky to see our election system hold, and that we will have a transfer of power on January 20th.  Since I'm writing this a little before Christmas, none of us have any idea whether our current president will be present at our new president's inauguration.  Will he be absent because he's to embarrassed to be present at an event that shows he's a loser?  Will he be absent because the inauguration will be both quiet and private because of the pandemic?  If I were the incoming president, I wouldn't bother with the usual pomp and circumstance, and would choose a private ceremony - to avoid creating a super spreader event.

I find it amazing how quickly "Big Pharma" developed vaccines for Covid-19.  And it's just in time.  America has gotten "pandemic tired" and needs to return to "normalcy".  Last spring, none of us would even think of taking planes to see family on the other side of the country. Today, Thanksgiving and Christmas have both become a sort of super spreader event.  I don't know how much longer we can take of not living "normal" lives.  And I think many people will be emotionally scarred due to life changes necessitated by the pandemic.  

2021 will bring a lot of changes with it.  And I look forward to most of them.  Hopefully, all of our lives will be a bit better this year....