The aftermath of a snowstorm

 

 

After I finished yesterday's entry, a neighbor kept pestering me about not moving my car. To make a long story short, I was not aware that people in tandem parking spaces (like mine) should move their cars before a snow storm, so that plows can push snow into the far end of these spots.  And my neighbor wanted to give me a piece of her mind for not moving my car, when I was not in the mood to go out in the snow....

When the snow eased off around 8:00 pm, I shoveled out my car from 18 inches of snow, and moved it into a nearby cleared out space, giving the plows a better place to push snow. Then, I went inside to rest.  This was not a night I wanted to communicate with people, but I had to respond to the ex when she messaged me.  She was wondering why I was quiet, and I didn't want to say that I wasn't in the best of moods to talk with anyone. So we exchanged messages for a while then called it a night.

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Getting up in the morning was relatively easy.  For the most part, I've been waking up around 8-8:30, just in time to watch Perry Mason in its many reruns. Once I heard the plow come to do a better cleaning of the parking lot, I took a quick shower, dressed (sadly, as Mario), and went out for a long drive.  This would give our snow removal guys the chance to clean out our lot and push all the snow into the back of our tandem spaces. 

While out, I had the opportunity to see fresh snow on the ground and to enjoy the sunlight while I could. Passing by the side of the Old Croton Dam (now underwater), I couldn't help but stop to take the above picture.  It certainly doesn't look like it's in an area within 50 miles of New York Ciry, doesn't it?  As I returned home, I met one of my neighbors, and we discussed some of the problems with the property - such as the wood on his patio deck needing to be replaced.  I mentioned that we are prioritizing repairs as best we can, and that we can't do anything about his deck until the spring.

Once in the apartment, I was in for the day.  As the roads froze, they would become less safe to drive on. And I had no need to go out again.

 

Christmas Eve started with an unwanted conversation.

I knew today was going to be a little strange from the moment I checked my first emails.  There was a message from a friend telling me that our links on social media were being severed.  Without any explanation, it felt like a slap in the face.  Did I do something wrong?

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We've all had to learn our way around social media.  Although I won't go into any of the "Who, What, Which, Where, When, of How" of it, I can say that the email conversation that followed from the earlier message made me feel a little better - the issues were on the friend's side and not mine. But what if a person just dropped a bombshell like this on you and gave you no clue in follow up conversation.  How would you feel?

Our children are confronted with this and other social media issues every day.  Social media is used and abused.  It is both a news source about our friends and about the world as a whole.  And there is a lot of misinformation being spread which is meant to hurt people.  Due to the nature of tools like Facebook, slander can be spread instantaneously without the person being slandered having a clue to what is happening. There is even less time than before for a person to mount a defense.  Not having children, I can only imagine what they are dealing with these days.

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By 9:00 am, I had fully awakened due to the above mentioned conversation, and I had the pleasure of watching an episode of Perry Mason that I've been waiting a while to see.

Years ago, Raymond Burr was out from work on Perry Mason, and had several guest stars (as guest lawyers) taking on cases with the typical Perry Mason style.  Today's rerun, "The Case of Constant Doyle" guest starred Bette Davis, and she filled in the role perfectly.  If this wasn't Burr's series, I'd have thought it was Davis's series.  She was that good in her role. And it made me wish that the network could have done a spinoff series starring Bette Davis.  Sadly, few movie stars at the time considered TV acting as a craft as respectable as acting on stage or in the movies.  So we only have that one instance of Bette Davis in her prime doing what she does best on TV - being a strong, confident woman who could not be pushed around by anyone.

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Now back to the Christmas season....

One of the blogs I read discussed the masculine difference in Christmas Shopping:

1. Men get less satisfaction out of gift buying
2. Men don’t want to buy the gifts that women want to receive 
3. The thought of buying and receiving presents makes us anxious 
4. Gift buying isn’t men’s way of expressing love 
5. Men love the challenge of a one-day hunt (my favorite)

In regard to gift buying, I am much more like the typical male than the typical female.  I get little satisfaction about gift buying. Yet, I want to buy the type of gift that a person wants to receive. The thought of buying gifts makes me anxious, as I don't to get it wrong.  And it certainly isn't my way of expressing love.  Unlike the typical man, I don't relish the challenge of a one day hunt - I prefer to have my shopping done days or weeks in advance.

Shopping for GFJ this season posed me some interesting issues.  How do I send the right signals with my gifts?  I have to get her size right if I'm buying clothing, yet I can't buy anything that would not be her style.  Luckily, I knew GFJ's size range, so I was able to buy her a sweater that would fit (and if not, was from a store "semi convenient" to her).  The other gifts were easier for me, as I had ideas of what she could use and something that others had advised me to give her.

But if you think GFJ was an issue, what about my brother and his wife?   I was constrained by the requirement not to spend too much on him (we only exchange inexpensive gifts) and something that could be used by both my brother and his wife (I didn't want to give anything that would be too personal, as they are currently having problems with their marriage.) So I ended up giving them a popcorn maker.

- - - - - -

Lately, when I get a text from JS, one of the first things she wants to know is have I been able to fix things with GFJ.  (She doesn't know that GFJ is a female.  But that's another story that I've mentioned in my prior blog.)  And I've had to deflect these questions.  My big question is: Why is my romantic relationship so important?  But then, JS would like for me to help her write a personal ad for her.  There are several reasons that she could be looking for a man.  First is romance.  Second is a financial security blanket.  If she's open about herself and her issues, I have no problem helping her.  But if she's looking for a sugar daddy to take care of her (due to her own weak financial resources), then I have some reservations.

This got me thinking of my former travel partner.  She had cravings for companionship which bordered on addiction.  She'd put up with a man who'd mistreat her, instead of waiting (possibly in vain) for someone who'd treat her with love in the way she deserves.

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Since I'm writing this on Christmas Eve, I don't want to end this post on a down note.  Instead, I'd rather wish my readers a happy and prosperous time in the new year.




Happy New Year!!!!!



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I did plenty of nothing, and nothing's plenty for me!

Today was a day that didn't lend itself to going outside.  The forecast called for a wintry mix, with about 3/8" of ice being deposited on everything.  This was not weather to drive in, and this made it a good day to stay inside - which I did.

Although I could have done a load of laundry, that would have meant getting dressed.  That's something which was not in the cards for today.  So the hamper continued to hold a load of clothes which could get done at anytime this week.  Given the choice between getting out of a warm bed on a cold day or staying comfortable, you can guess what my choice would be.

Later in the afternoon, I got an email asking me whether an 11:45 start time for speech therapy would be good for me, and I responded with a "Yes."  When I checked my schedule, I noticed a meetup I had scheduled for a Saturday afternoon in January - I had a timing conflict.  Sadly, I will miss this foodie meetup.  But I will continue on my path to developing a more feminine voice - and that's the more important thing to do in my opinion.

- - - - - -

Watching the news today, I become more and more afraid that we are heading down the path to a not so civil war.  Most of us would admit that we are in the middle of a cultural war.  America is polarized as it has been in only one other period in history, and that ended with the Civil War.  Whether or not one is a Republican or Democrat, this is not a good sign for us transgender folk.

The more I find out about what's going on in Washington, the more I worry.  In the past, I'd merely get upset at the "opposition party".  But now it gets my blood boiling.  I have to change the channel as soon as I turn it on.  And that's not good.  We are in the cross hairs of part of the GOP's base, and many of their proposed laws are aimed directly at us.

How do I deal with it?  More and more, I seek the entertainment that I grew familiar with when I was younger - shows like the original Perry Mason still make me feel that there is some form of justice in the world.  Old Westerns also serve the same function for me - the difference between right and wrong was easy to see, and one knew that good would triumph over evil.  Even though John Wayne in real life was not a man I could easily respect, I loved what his "cowboy" characters stood for - especially when John Ford was the director of the film.

- - - - - -

Like many people whose views I disagree with, I also yearn for the simplicity of the 1950's.  Unlike these people, I support the ideals which America stood for back then, and not the reality of what America was.  When I look at the old TV shows, I see part of what America could be, as well as by omission, things we need to fix for our future.

Right now, I enjoy the idea of relaxing and doing nothing.  Reality has a habit of catching up with us way too quickly for comfort....


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And if you've gotten this far....

Merry Christmas to you and your families!

My day started with a chat while listening to Perry Mason

The one routine I try to keep every morning is to turn the TV to an "Oldies TV Station" and watch Perry Mason.  Occasionally, I'll sit at my computer desk and read my email wile the show is playing.  But I try to never get into a conversation while the show is on - it's a moment of sanity in the insane world I have to deal with.

- - - - - -

This morning, I was responding to email and messages while the show was on. And I got into an online chat with a friend while "my show" was playing.  I was not yet awake enough to chat on the phone, so I deferred the chat until later on.  And then, I went back to bed and rested for a while.Later on, I got moving and had a bite to eat.  Part of me wishes I didn't, as my scale says that I've gained a bit of weight since Thanksgiving and that I must get back in the habit of eating normally.

In the online chat, the subject of my former cruise partner (FCP) came up.  I mentioned that the main reason I cut off all communication with her was that I do not like being ordered to do things, and that she was trying to order me around as if I were her child.  You might recall (from my previous blog) that I got annoyed when she started to tell me how to cut a piece of steak. Well, I grew up in a household where my mother knew no limits of privacy nor where her limits of control were.  It is no coincidence that I moved over an hour away from my parents.  Unlike my brother, I never had to endure any unannounced visits from my parents, nor did I have to worry about my mother going into my closets, cabinets, or drawers when I was not around.  FCP pushed my buttons, and when she went too far, I knew that I would never go on another cruise with her again.

- - - - - -

I got delayed in doing laundry this afternoon, as I got into a conversation with our co-op's superintendent.  He's a good fellow, and we found out that some information regarding his employment wasn't transferred to the new managing agent from the old agent.  This put the co-op in an awkward situation, as we were not aware of this issue before our end-of-year meeting.  So we will be addressing this issue next month, in order to resolve the issue in an appropriate manner.

Once my laundry was done, I drove to Beacon for the dining meetup.  I was 15 minutes late, and was not able to sit with the main group of people.  Instead, I ended up sitting with one lady, her husband, and a couple of their friends.  This was the first time I got the chance to speak to this lady without her brother being around, as well as the first time I've gotten the chance to speak with this woman's husband.  It might have been fortunate circumstance that I arrived at the restaurant a little late after all.

- - - - - -

On the way home, I stopped at Walmart to find some sweats for my dad.  Unfortunately, the Fishkill store was sold out of everything near my dad's size.  So I may have to order some sweats online and hope they get here before Xmas....

I have a good, but temporary feeling....

This morning, I got a call back from the US Census Bureau.  They asked me if I was interested in an Office Operations Supervisor position.  Considering it was an "inside job" (Full Time) located less than 5 miles away from home (Peekskill), I figured that I might as well say that I was interested in this temporary position, and accept that I could make a few extra bucks while waiting for a better position to come along.

- - - - - -

Normally, I don't answer my phone between 9 and 10 in the morning.  Once Fred Steiner's tune (Park Avenue Beat) begins to play and Raymond Burr's image (as Perry Mason) appears on my TV, my telephone will not get answered until the end of the show.  It is a guilty pleasure of mine, and it might be the one reason I may eventually subscribe to the CBS All Access streaming channel in the future.  (Of course, having Star Trek and The Twilight Zone there doesn't hurt either.) But once the show ends, I make myself available to people who want to talk with me. Today was a day where I followed my typical routine.

Around 9:30, the lady called from the census bureau looking to contact me.  A little while after the show had ended (and I had a chance to fully wake up), I called her back. A short description of this position follows:

As an Office Operations Supervisor, you will be responsible for the supervision of the day-to-day activities of the office clerks who support payroll, recruiting or supply management. Also monitoring the quality of work including the status and production.

However, the script that was read to me had much more detail than the two sentence blurb above.  When she read the script about the position, I picked up on the following information:

Assists in:

• Payroll
• Inventory Management
• Clerical Tasks
• Flow Control
• Quality Assurance

Hours: 8-4 or 9-5      5 days/week     8 hours/day
Hired on for 8 weeks at a time. 
Trains Clerks and reviews their work
Monitors Progress against time critical schedules.

You'll note that the two sentence blurb contains all the same information I wrote down in my notes. But with both my notes and the blurb, I have a better idea of what will be expected of me - and from this job, I could eventually get an office manager job at a small business.  (This just happens to be the same kind of position that my late wife had.  My collar may be getting pinker every day.😀 )  However, this is not the position I really would have liked to have been called back for. (I had applied for a position which involved the maintenance of computer equipment on the same site.)  But if it can keep me from having to drain my savings account for a few months, it's worth taking on the position for 8 weeks at a time. The only problems I see are that I can't schedule my vacation cruise when I want to take it, I lose my flexibility to do things in the daytime, and I may have to be at work by 8 am.  OUCH!

- - - - - -

The big question:  Would I be able to socially transition on the job?





PS: The more I looked at the email and paperwork I received, it looks like I've been given an offer, as long as I pass a background check and get fingerprinted.  Although they had a training class the week following next, it interfered with long booked plans.  So I scheduled my fingerprinting for the day before that class, so that I'd have to be scheduled for a later class.  But I will ask one question before I go in for my fingerprinting - I am gender non conforming, with plans to transition.  Can I go for my ID card in my feminine presentation, and have the familiar, not my formal given name on the ID card?