Trekking into NYC and taking care of paperwork

 

I had one thing that I had to take care of today, and I can blame part of my failure to do so on my brother. Yet, today's focus is not on a minor screw up, but on visiting the neighborhood in which I used to work.

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The plan for today was to trek into NYC to get an official copy of both my birth certificate and that of my deceased father.  I'd have no problem getting my own birth certificate.  But to get my dad's birth certificate, I would need an official copy of my dad's death certificate - which my brother was supposed to mail to me, but didn't.

So, around 11 am, I drove to Croton-Harmon railroad station, stopping first at a local deli. Instead of taking 5 minutes to get my usual sausage and egg sandwich, it took 15.  So I arrived at the train station with barely enough time to make the 11:48 train.  And when I say barely, I mean just that.  I was in the elevator with 3 minutes to go, and had just purchased my train ticket as the train came into the station.  Luckily, I was able to make it down the stairs and onto the train without rushing, as I'd have to wait another 30+ minutes for the next train.

Arriving at Grand Central, I noticed hot hot and humid it felt.  (I was glad that I had chosen to travel as Mario, as wearing a wig would have been too much to deal with today.)  30 minutes later, I was downtown and in front of NYC's bureau of vital records.  (I wish I had kept in the habit of walking at least 2 miles each day, as my legs were bothering me for the first mile I walked.) After checking to make sure I was at the right building, I killed time at the Starbucks across the street.

Once inside, it was bureaucracy in action.  First, one takes a number.  Next, one enters ALL the information needed to purchase a vital record, in my case a birth certificate. And then, you wait for your number to be called and to pay for your service.  While entering my data, I was told that my dad's birth certificate had to be ordered by mail AND that I needed my dad's death certificate.  AARGH!  I could have stayed comfortable and done everything by mail had my brother sent me the death certificate as promised.

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Once done with the bureau of vital records, I walked over to where I used to work (a much longer walk than I remembered) to get lunch at the Halal cart I used to regularly patronize.  Although there were 2 carts there now, I picked one that best resembled what I remembered from 10 years ago and ordered my old everyday order - a chicken and lamb combo with lots of white sauce and a touch of hot sauce.  But I now had a problem. Where could I sit down and eat?  So I decided to walk a couple of blocks and find a place to sit.  The only place I found with open seats was inside a playground for dogs.  This was perfect, as I had free entertainment provided by the dogs and their owner while I enjoyed my meal.

Soon, I was on my way back home, and I was back in my car around 5 pm.  Once at home, I fell asleep for an hour or so and then was ready to take care of some chores before calling it a day.  At least, I likely won't need to trek into NYC again for paperwork purposes anytime soon.

I did virtually nothing, save walk 3/4 mile.

 

Buying 3 exercise dresses has motivated me to go outside and walk.  Yes, I wonder if people see this T-Gal as just a fat woman trying to stay mobile, or whether they see this T-Gal as a man in a dress.  Given that I'm comfortable going outside as a woman in outfits like the photo above, I do so - and no one seems to be batting an eyelash.

I've found that in order for my face to look more feminine, prop glasses (no corrective lenses) are a must.  If I didn't wear them, people would focus on the parts of my face where I don't want any focus.  (Could facial feminization surgery be in my future?  Only RQS will be able to answer that in a few years.)

Over time, I'd like to find an inexpensive yoga studio near me where I could go as Marian and no one batting an eyelash.  I've come close, but finding a studio has not been at the top of my priority list.  Yet, my goal is to get back to a size 20-22 within a couple of years.  To do that, it'll take diet, exercise and maybe a few shots of a GLP-1 agonist.

Today, I decided to take a walk at George's Island Park.  I've yet to find the official hiking paths there, but I have found a few vantage points from which one can enjoy views of the Hudson River.  It was a little cool for me to be wearing just this exercise dress.  Next time, if it is as cool as it was today, I will bring a jacket I bought from the active wear section of Lane Bryant.

After I left the park, I had a nice conversation with TCL.  And then I called my brother.  I needed to find out the exact spelling of the name my dad used on his passport, so that I can request a copy of his birth certificate.  New York City has to do a manual search on birth certificates which have not yet been digitized, as they are in the middle of indexing the entire physical database of vital records and the year of my dad's birth has not been indexed yet.  

Tomorrow, it will be dinner with a new meetup group.  Wish me luck!

A visit to the museum

 

Today, RQS and I had an errand to run before the day's end - she needed to go to a jewelry store to have a link added to her watch band.  So I had an idea:  If we got out of the house early enough, we could go to the Magazzino Italian Art Museum in Cold Spring, NY.  

When I first saw this museum on the side of the road, I thought it was a warehouse for the sale of Italian art.  Well, I was partially right.  From what I was told, the Italian word "Magazzino" translates to the English word "Warehouse".  So I can say that I was half right.  Once I found out that this was a museum, I figured that I'd visit it when I had an opportunity.  Today was that opportunity.

Both RQS and I got dressed and out of the house by 2:45 pm.  By 3:30 pm, we were at the museum.  And this is where we got exposed to Contemporary Italian Art.  Much of it was not my taste.  But some of it captured both RQS's and my interests.  (You might see my reflection in one of the artworks above.) If you get the chance to visit this place, do so!  Not only is the art interesting.  But the grounds are beautiful too.  Both of us took lots of photos inside and outside the museum, and we might just go back in the fall to enjoy the grounds and some upcoming exhibits.

Once done with the museum, we drove into Cold Spring proper and had some ice cream before driving home.  After dinner, we went out again for a walk.  I had changed into my black exercise dress, and got compliments from both RQS and one of my neighbors.  (That was a nice way to end this day!)

RQS had to go home today.

 

RQS was up here for a long weekend. It's always nice to have her here.  But it's also nice to see her go home, if only because we both need to recharge our batteries for the following weekend.  We long for each other and are energized when the weekend comes, and we are re-energized when we part.  I think it's because we both have gotten used to having our own nests, and are re-energized by being able to retreat into our own spaces to do the things we would have done on our own before meeting each other.  Simply put, love in one's senior years is more complicated than when we were young.

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Yesterday, the high point of our day was a trip to Stew Leonard's to buy food for the week.  Today, it was the 1-mile walk we took by the Hudson River before it got too hot to do anything outside. It was nice being able to wear my exercise dress again.  RQS noted that she saw another woman wearing her exercise dress.  So I guess I didn't look out of place, save for my height and size.  By the time we were done with this walk (shortly before 11:00 am), all energy was drained from us.  I was glad that we set a limit of 20 minutes to be exposed to the hot and humid weather outside.  After this walk, we went to a deli that I used to frequent daily when I worked for the census bureau.  Four years later, I am still remembered there. 

We spent the rest of the afternoon resting in my apartment.  Unfortunately, I had to wake her up so that she could make her train back to the city.  So, we both got dressed in lightweight dresses, and out the door we went.  After dropping her off, I drove to Poughkeepsie and stopped off at Walmart on the way back home to pick up some makeup remover towelettes and Pointed Tip Swabs. (Think of Q-Tips with a pointed head - perfect for cleaning the area where my ear piercings were done.)  Once home, I was done for the day - and almost ready to go to sleep again.

2023 Bermuda Cruise - Day 4 (Port Day)

Wednesday, November 22, 2023.

The day started with the crowing of a rooster. No, there were no live chickens onboard the ship. Instead, it was my alarm trying to wake us up early enough for RQS to make it to the ship’s infirmary while they had clinic hours.  Like yesterday, the sky was cloudy when we awoke, but neither of us wanted to get moving. Both of us heard my phone’s obnoxious alarm, and it roused both of us as intended. Getting showered and dressed was hard for RQS, but she was out the door before me, as I was still dressing while she hobbled to the clinic.

When I arrived at the clinic, RQS was still filling out paperwork prior to being treated. Shortly afterward, RQS was brought into the examination room while I waited outside. The waiting area was sterile in more than one sense. In this case, all the furnishings were in the same color scheme as the walls - a very light beige. The floor was a light creamsickle orange, and the seats were a non-descript shade of gray. About the only things that could be said to stand out in this area were the pictures on the walls and the bright red biohazard bucket. This is where I waited, when I would have preferred to stay in our cabin until called for.

RQS came out several hundred dollars lighter than when she entered the clinic, with some pain killer pills, instructions to stay off her feet, and to use an ice pack on her ankle. This would not be a pleasant way for her to spend time on the ship. And then, ship security arrived to record our accounts of the embarkation day incident. If we’re lucky, we might be able to use a copy of the security investigation and the medical bill to have RQS’s medical expenses reimbursed by our travel insurance company.

And then we were off to have breakfast. Breakfast at O’Sheehan’s, a casual dining area on the ship, was mediocre, as both service and food quality was lacking.  Next time we'd decide to have breakfast on the ship, it would be at one of the other complimentary dining rooms, where they will deliver all components of a meal in a timely manner.

While RQS was relaxing in our cabin, I went to the buffet looking for some cookies.  In the process of heading to the buffet, I met someone with whom I struck up a conversation. By the time our chat was over, the buffet was setting up for lunch. And this gave me an opportunity to bring RQS something to eat. But I found no cookies! WHERE ARE THE COOKIES ON THIS SHIP???? On the way back to the cabin, an attendant was delivering cookies to several cabins, and if by magic (with a friendly ask of the attendant), RQS now had both the cookies she asked for and her lunch.

After lunch, I decided to and take a long walk. One of the stops I made along the way was a shop in the Clocktower mall to buy some jewelry for myself (when presenting as Marian). I figure that it will go well with the blue dresses I enjoy wearing. (I’m making a note to take care of some purchases I need to make when I get home.) While out, I checked my email, and found that there were a couple of messages of unknown origin that I have to check out. The first was likely a scam, as I know no one in a foreign country that I’d want to talk to. The second was a person who had my name who claimed to be from the Social Security office. This is one call that I must be careful to fully verify its origin before giving out any information - including that which I could consider harmless. (Let’s see if there is some snail mail in my box when I get home, as I believe that SSA uses that to establish first contact.) I don’t want to have a scammer spoof my identity before I am even able to collect my first SS payment.

Near the far end of my walk, I passed by the local prison. That was one place where I decided NOT to stop for a rest. A few minutes later, I passed by Pulpit Rock (no, I don’t have a picture of it) where I was able to take a few more photos. At that point, I decided to return to the ship, as it was getting late and I wanted to be back onboard before the sun went down. 

On the whole, it was not a day that I would have planned to have. But it was productive, as I got in more walking than I usually do in a typical November week.

Going outdoors in the cold - BRRRR!!!!

 

It was a little over 2 years ago when I took the above picture.  And, boy was it cold!  Although today's outdoor activity involved a walk in a local park, I was still a bit hesitant to go outdoors in this weather.  However, I used a cisgender woman's trick - wearing a pair of tights under my trousers to keep warm in this weather.

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However, 1 pm came, and I had to make it to Rockefeller State Park in time to meet my friend, YGD, from my Thursday night gaming group.  I don't know if any of my readers have had the chance to walk through this park.  But it is a nice place to visit on a quiet weekday, as it is easy to maintain social distancing and have a nice walk.  Plus, during the winter, they don't charge parking fees on weekdays.

We started our walk at the main parking lot, and made it up to Stone Barns Center before turning back to our cars. I was surprised that I needed to stop along the way, but I think it's because I'm not used to going up and down hills.  The slightly extra effort to keep moving showed me how out of shape I am.  Yet, I kept moving after catching my breath.  (No, I wasn't gasping for air.  Instead, I just didn't want to elevate the stress level I was putting my body through.  I was comfortable, and didn't want to feel like I was making a strenuous effort to maintain a specific pace.)  A little bit under an hour after we started, we got back to our starting point and chatted for a while before going our separate ways.  Hopefully, we will be able to do this again next week.

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After I left the park, it was off to the supermarket.  $60 later, I was on my way home, hoping to find enough room in the ice box for all the stuff I bought.  Once I was done with everything, I realized that I had to go out again - there were books waiting for me at the local library for me to pick up.  For once, the important activities of my day took place before 8 pm for a change....

 

When I woke up, it was colder than I originally expected.

It was not this cold outside today, but it was colder than I expected. 

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The last time I went out walking, it was in the 40's. And I felt comfortable outside wearing a pair of jeans and a long sleeve shirt under a coat when I walked with my friend from my Thursday night group.  Today, being 10 degrees cooler than my last outdoor walk, I figured that it might be a little too cold for me to walk outdoors. So I texted a friend, and asked if we could change our get together from a walk and maybe a bite to eat to just a bite to eat. And our plans changed, so that we could meet at a local brewpub.  

Around 1 pm, we met at the empty brewpub and talked about many things.  I talked about many of the things I mention in this blog: some with more detail than I write here, and some with less detail. One of the things I mentioned was that I had no place yet to go for Xmas. So now, I have a place to go if I have no other invitations for the day.  Because it was warmer than either of us expected when we finished with lunch, we took the chance to move our cars out of the brewpub's parking lot to a place where it was safe to park the cars for an hour or so. And then we walked a short distance before turning back.  (BTW: I found out that I need to put a pair of gloves into the pockets of my new coat.)

As I've mentioned here and elsewhere, I'm a bit concerned about how this winter is going to look like.  Will people hunker down at home and take realistic precautions against being infected by the virus?  Or, will they throw caution to the wind (albeit slowly) and allow the pandemic to continue its second wave? I plan to obey all of the restrictions put upon us by  our state's government, as I don't want another lock down as is now about to start in California.

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Thinking of California for a minute, several of my acquaintances live in the San Francisco Bay area.  My Aunt and Uncle live in Los Angeles. They will all be affected by the upcoming lock downs.  The state is an example of a government which has delegated too much power to the people. At least one county (San Mateo) is not planning on following the governor's directive to do a 3 week lock down.  Instead, they plan to perform a "Swiss Cheese" approach to closing things down, and as a result, have very little effect in stopping the spread of the virus.

Recently, I found a new search engine (people locator), and I may have found where an ex girlfriend of 44 years ago lives.  If I'm right, I'll consider dropping off some snail mail just to say hello.  I don't have much to say, I live on the other side of the country, and I pose no threat to this woman's comfort.  So, I might have a pleasant response if I do this.  The odds are that I won't send this letter.  But it would be nice to reconnect with someone who affected my life in a positive manner and tell her this after all these years.

Another acquaintance in the Bay Area knows about my bi-gendered nature, and is comfortable with it.  Hopefully, she will survive the winter, and that I'll get to see her on my next visit to the Bay area.  It's been around 8 years since I was there last, and it's time to get out there again. This time, it'll be much more expensive for me to visit. But I'm coupling this trip with: (1) a visit to LA to see my Aunt and Uncle, (2) a broken leg train trip from LA to Seattle, (3) meeting up with my nephew in Seattle, and (4) a cross country train trip back home.  It'll be an expensive trip.  So it won't be something I'll do on the spur of the moment.

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Now that I've started to think of warm places, Florida comes to mind.  I have some acquaintances I'd like to visit there, and have no intentions of doing so until the pandemic lifts. As is well known, the governor is a GOP buffoon, and doesn't take the pandemic seriously. He hews to the Trump party line. And this has put an ex girlfriend of mine (and her partner) at risk. No, I do not plan to visit this ex.  But I would like to visit two people who have been mentioned in my previous blog before life made other plans for me.

Assuming I decide to visit Florida, my trips between cities will need to be taken as Mario.  I don't trust this state's attitudes towards people like me in this political climate.  One could easily get killed if the wrong people were to find out my biological gender doesn't match up with my gender presentation.  As much as some people have no trouble "traveling pretty" (as Kim would put it), I still feel that I have to be very careful.  But I'm not in any hurry.  I don't plan on making this trip until next winter at the earliest.

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Hopefully, I will get back to traveling and meeting people sometime next year.  I'm more than willing to pay the price in loneliness to get out the other side of this pandemic without catching the virus. But it is a heavier price than I'd like to pay to be on the other side....