Sometimes, I miss a former friend.

 

It's been a little over 15 months since my former cruise partner and I severed our friendship.  I will never go into a detailed apology for my actions, as I don't want to give her any ammunition she could use against me.  (She's the type of person who would try to destroy a person out of anger.) Yet, I once sent her an olive branch to suggest that we try to repair things.

The other day, I mentioned something to the ex girlfriend - that I threw out a framed picture I have of the former friend.  I don't want it anymore, and I doubt my ex friend would want it either.  There is a touch of sadness here, as my ex girlfriend doesn't understand why the my ex cruise partner and I couldn't patch up things.  The former cruise partner couldn't stand how I referenced her in my prior blog (she didn't like seeing herself in a sometimes harsh light), and I couldn't stand how she defamed me to at least two (or more) people I know.  There are lines which two friends should never cross, and we crossed them.

You'll note that the face of the person in the center of the picture is obscured by her hair.  I was lucky to have this picture of my former cruise partner in better times. (She wouldn't want her face exposed here.)  Strangely, it was on the same ship on the same itinerary where we had a problems several years later. One thing I know, I will never cruise out of the Brooklyn Cruise Terminal again....

 

Another Monday, another walk in the park.

 

If it weren't for the fact that I want to build up a better friendship with YGD, I'd have passed on going to a local park for a hike today.  My sleep patterns are totally screwed up, and I've found that I've been catching a few hours of sleep at random times through the day.  Since I haven't put on my CPAP machine, this sleep is not as good as I'd like it to be.  

With the above being said, I decided to stay awake and see YGD near where she lives - in Greenwich, CT.  I was pleasantly surprised at how many places are available in her neck of the woods for easy hiking, as this was the second place in Greenwich we've hiked.  I was even more surprised to find out that she does most of her hiking in the Hudson Valley.  Given enough hikes over the years, I'd bet that she'd have bumped into my ex girlfriend on one of those hikes.  But, without me trying to connect the two, there is no reason that this should be a problem for me.

As we started out on today's hike, I almost twisted my ankle and needed medical attention.  This is the one thing I didn't need to happen, as I'm still fighting with my insurance company to get my coverage straightened out. However, I was able to recover my footing in a way that didn't cause me to hurt myself. But it did made me hyper aware  of how I was walking for the totality of the hike.

If this were a normal day out in the woods, we might have gone somewhere for a bite to eat.  However, with the pandemic spiking lately, eating indoors is not highly recommended.  So we agreed to get together next week (weather permitting), and will look for a nice place to walk before then. 

Someone I know was getting her Covid-19 shot. I wish it were me!

 

 

Yes, another person I know was scheduled to get her Covid-19 shot today.  The way things are going, I'll be among the last of the people I know to get the shots I need to start living a "normal" life again.  

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It seems as if every time I chat with TCL, and I make a mildly negative comment about something (though I'm doing well) she asks why I am complaining?  To give you an example of this, I made a negative comment on the paperwork my brother and I will need to fill out to claim some of the money left in my dad's estate.  When I made the comment, I was thinking of my dad, wishing he was still with us and that the money was still his.  She focused on the paperwork as being a small price I would pay to have some more money in my bank account, so I shouldn't complain about paperwork.  The reality is, most of us complain a little about the minor inconveniences we have to deal with in life.  If these were big problems, most of us would act upon them as best we could.  Minor complaints seem to be the way we try to make ourselves a little bit more comfortable while dealing with the little bumps along life's journey.

In my case, I have a minor item to "complain" about today. Since my friend had her Covid-19 shot scheduled for today, it got in the way of me seeing her.  Kvetch, Kvetch, Kvetch....   Not seeing her today may be a form of a blessing, as we were thinking of walking around Chinatown a little bit.  Did I really want to bring my car into Lower Manhattan?  Not really. But I would have thought about doing so to have some time with her.

If I had known what this day would be like, I'd have considered going out as Marian.  But today ended up being a Mario day. Could I change into Marian?  Yes.  But I might as well do a load or two of laundry and relax for a while before going out again....

 

 

 

 

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Mid January Odds and Ends

 

 

Sometimes, I don't have much to say about any one topic, but I'm trying to keep my readers up to date on things with a post.  This is one of those posts....

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I've been having problems with my health insurance.  My membership number changed, and the paperwork to fix my problem has been taking longer than expected to be processed.  Today, I reached out to the company once more, and someone placed my issue on a high priority queue.  Hopefully, I'll have the bulk of the matter resolved by Monday, and the only thing left to do will be to connect the membership to a new email account AND to get things set up properly for my mail order medications.

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My brother and I are closing out accounts my dad had before he died.  They don't amount to much money, but they will provide us with much needed money for luxuries.  In my case, this money will help pay for a vacation or two.  In my brother's case, it will pay for a delayed trip to see my niece and her (to be) husband in London.  We had a minor problem with one of these accounts, as it got locked when my dad died. But we expect to have the money in our "grubby" little hands soon.

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I finally have my auto registration in hand.  There is only one more thing I need to do with it: replace the old sticker on my windshield with a new one.  Of course, I'll drive down to see my brother to see if he has the scraping tool needed to get the old sticker off the windshield - it's a perfect excuse to see him before driving over to see FH.

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My friend from my Thursday night gaming group has taken the plunge and is setting up her own online game night starting Wednesday evenings.  I think I'll have another something to look forward to while locked down inside, waiting out the pandemic.

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Next week, I'll be getting together with another of my friends who knows me only as Marian. It'll be nice to see her once again. But with the pandemic raging, this might be the last time I meet anyone other than FH, YGD, Vicki #1 , my brother and his wife for a while.  Of the people in my circle, I'm one of the few that is under 65 AND doesn't have a reason to be an early recipient of the coronavirus vaccine.

 

Thoughts about the Pandemic so far

 

 

OK, it's been a bad year, and I expect that we'll have a bad winter to endure before springtime brings the promise of normalcy returning to our lives.  Until then, we will need to hunker down as best we can.

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When pandemic first started, the general public didn't know what was happening, nor did any of us know what best to do to stay safe.  I can remember one meetup group holding large meetings when the government was trying to limit the size of gatherings just before New York's lock down.  For the next 6 weeks or so, most of us rarely ventured out of our houses, socializing only via Zoom meetups.  Schools hastily figured out ways to hold classes remotely, with mixed results.  Businesses figured out ways to allow employees to work from home.  Other businesses were forced to close because they required in person presences. There were so many things that happened at this time, that I don't think any of us will remember all the salient details. During these days, many of us lost loved ones, myself included. And most of us were totally afraid of catching the virus, as if it was a terminal disease.  Yet, only 2% of the people contracting the virus in its early days died.  The other 98% has mixed results with their recoveries. 

Sometime in late spring, we started to develop a new normal, as people started to socialize outdoors. I can still remember when the road leading to Croton Dam Park had people parked on both sides, walking 1/2 mile or so to be able to enjoy the outdoors in the park.  As for me, I started to drive further North, so that I could walk rail trails in relative peace.  Meetup groups started to get together for outdoor dining (and other activities), allowing people to get together in a reasonably safe environment. New York City streets were invaded by outdoor dining patios, and the public took to the streets in a new and pleasant way. New York State (and its neighbors) took the pandemic seriously, and people were willing to make the sacrifices needed to reduce the infection rate.

Unfortunately, many people in the more rural areas did not act as if the pandemic was their problem.  They acted as if the pandemic would never affect them - and it did.  We started seeing a second wave of the pandemic affect the country, this time causing previously "safe" areas to suffer as we did in New York months earlier.

Eventually, autumn came, and outdoor activities started to wind down.  This is when I started to fear that we would have a winter where the pandemic would replace the flu as our major medical concern.  People in urban areas were mostly comfortable wearing masks.  However, due to a pig-headed president, mask wearing and the virus itself became a political issue.  One could usually tell a person's political tribe by looking at a person's face - Democrats usually wore masks, while Republicans often did not.  People gradually became afraid of indoor dining (where it was allowed), and we became more and more isolated.  

One of the problems exposed by the pandemic was that people have a strong need to be with others.  We have social gatherings to fulfill this need, holiday celebrations, weddings, and funerals.  Regularly scheduled religious services also fill this need, and many of the people most serious about their religious activities sued the government to loosen the rules limiting social gatherings.  Some of the more orthodox simply ignored the rules meant to protect them by holding clandestine ultra large weddings and funerals, helping to spread the virus among large groups of people.  Tradition was more important than public safety.  Eventually, holiday season came around, and people made sure that they would not miss more time with their families. So they booked their Thanksgiving and Christmastime flights, and started a third wave of this virus.  People's need to be with family was more important than being safe.   

Now that winter is here, we are experiencing a nationwide spike in infections which makes what we saw last spring almost look benign.  Most of us are "pandemic tired" and feel that need to be with people.  One of my close friends was just diagnosed as having the virus. And I'm very glad that her symptoms (and her husband's) have been relatively mild.  I'm grateful that we didn't get together when she could have infected me.  But how long will any of us be able to stay safe?  Vaccinations have finally started, but are going slowly.  How many of us will let down our guards when we've been vaccinated?  Will the virus have mutated enough that current vaccines lose their effectiveness?  It's going to be a ride through the unknown, and I'm hoping we don't get too complacent because we're starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel.

 

 

Lately, I've been falling behind with my posts.

 

 

No, the winter hasn't been getting in the way of things.  It's been the pandemic.  When one has nothing to do all day, it's easy to do nothing.  In many ways, it feels like the snow has locked all of us inside for the winter, save for the fact that there is no snow on the ground.

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It's been a long while since I've been to Provincetown. And I'd love to have the legitimate reason to be there on a day like this, when I could see one of my favorite places filled only with locals.  No, I don't want to get stuck there in bad weather.  Instead, I simply want to see the town as only locals see it - without any of the tourists around.

There are so many places I'd like to visit without tourists.  If I were an Italian, I might be able to see Venice without the tourist invasions which befoul the city. Supposedly, due to the pandemic reducing commercial activities, the waters in that city are becoming cleaner and less reminiscent of a cesspool.  In the United States, however, the pandemic has made it impossible to travel to some places on my bucket list.  For example, I was considering taking a repositioning cruise from New York City to Seattle via the Panama Canal.  The early days of the pandemic made that impossible.  Next, I was considering taking a Hawaii cruise/tour this past December.  Again, the pandemic squelched that idea.  Now, the same cruise/tour costs over 50% more, as the cruise line is now restricting projected capacity on these vacations.

If I stay healthy and am able to afford it, I will still take similar vacations sometime in the future.  Until then, I expect the days to blur together, forcing me to catch up on my posting when I get around to it. 

Thinking about going to a museum.

 

 

The above picture does not do this piece of art justice.  The Dinner Party (by Judy Chicago) is best viewed in person at the Brooklyn Museum.  Like most great works of art, it is best appreciated close up and in-person with appropriate attention being given to the details which are not put into perspective in photographic reproductions.

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I miss going into NYC to meet up with my niece and to go to a museum.  She is now locked down in London, and isn't going anywhere anytime soon.  As soon as things open up for her, she will do the equivalent of going to a "marriage mill" in our country, and get the legal procedure done that will allow her fiancee and her to live as man and wife.  But I digress....

Recently, I talked with a NYC resident, and she told me of the relative desertion of the NYC subway system.  She implied that it is much more comfortable to travel in the subway during the pandemic than it was before the pandemic - enough people have abandoned mass transit to allow many people to maintain appropriate social distancing underground.

Given that my vaccination priority is about to be called soon, I figure that it would be a stupid thing for me to catch the virus by letting down my guard, than if I stayed in my bubble for 2-3 months more.  But who knows?  There is a certain craving that can't be satisfied by staying alone in my room.  And sometimes, I feel it's worth the risk to start living my life again.

Knowing me, I probably won't go into NYC on my own, as I don't want to pay the price to park my car in Manhattan.  Could it be that my general frugality has been a reason I'm still alive? That would be an interesting thought....