A true "Bucket List" cruise.

 

This is a cruise I'd like to take someday in the future.  It's 28 days long, and it goes to ports I'll never have the chance to go on other trips.  One of my friends from game night has taken a 1-way 2-week cruise from New York to Iceland, touching at some of these ports.  But I'd want to do a round trip, closed loop cruise and spend the better part of a week in Iceland.

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Yesterday, I found out how much RQS receives in pension and social security benefits, and I realized that she has many more demands on her monthly income than I have on an income 20% more than hers.  She'd never be able to afford such a trip on her own.  So, if I were to book this trip, I might as well pay for her share of a cabin, as it would cost me the same either way.  

There is one problem with this cruise - The last time it's being offered (right now) is in 2026.  Instead of costing $6600/pp, a similar 2027 cruise will cost $11400/pp and last 35 days.  However, it will be a Solar Eclipse cruise, and the cruise line is charging as much money as they can for the privilege of seeing the sun disappear from the sky for 4 minutes.  Hopefully, the cruise line will offer something similar to the 28-day cruise in 2028.

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In 2027, I'm hoping to be able to take RQS on a Hawaii cruise.  Sadly, with the new Hawaii taxes that start in 2026, it will cost at least 14% more expensive than it was this year (ignoring inflation).  It will still be worth the money spent.  But it will likely be the last time I get the chance to visit this state, as there are no discount ways to cruise the Hawaiian islands.

There are so many cruises I'd love to take.  I'm lucky - I have already checked off 3 of the most common bucket list cruises, with more to go.  Hopefully, I'll have both health and money to finish off my list. 

Going into the city for a movie

 

Even though RQS went home yesterday, our plans were to meet today in Midtown, NYC to have dinner and see a preview of a movie that won't be in wide scale release for another 2 weeks.  So, while RQS took care of her tasks, I took care of clarifying the logon to a cruise line's site and paying off a cruise on a different line we'll take next year.

RQS doesn't know that I've been thinking of giving her a cruise for Christmas (to be taken later on), as well as some other gifts she can open after Santa goes back up the chimney.   It's not something I'd consider doing all the time, but she is a good woman and I want to show her that I appreciate her in my life.  I'll have to figure out a way for me to pay for the cruise AND have all of her information in the reservation without her knowing.

- - - - - -

Around 5:00, I drove to Croton-Harmon, paid for parking, then got on the train to NYC.  Although it was a local, I had more than enough time to both make a subway connection and then walk to the restaurant where RQS was meeting me.  Darbar is a cozy Indian restaurant on 55th Street between Lexington and 3rd Avenues.  Although the prices seemed a little steep by the standards of places I eat at (they had a $60 Prix-fixe dinner menu, as well as a good al-a-carte menu), it was well worth the money.  By the time we finished dinner, we had 45 minutes to make it to the theater for "Wake Up Dead Man: A Knives Out Mystery."  

Although the new Knives Out movie is a preview of what is being released at month-end, we figured that it would be a great thing to go into NYC on a weeknight for something special.  One problem - we got there at 9:00 for a 9:30 showing, and there was nowhere to sit and wait.  My back was killing me for the next 35 minutes or so, as they were running late.  (There was a Q&A session with the director after the film.) So, it wasn't until 10:00 until the film started, and it lasted until after midnight.  (Go see this film! It starts slowly, as it has to introduce all the main characters.  But once it gets moving, it is a fun comedy wrapped inside a mystery movie.)  I won't spoil the movie for you, but I was able to guess who did it based on the actor's performance.

We left the theater at midnight and hailed a cab - first to drop me off at Grand Central, and then to bring RQS home safely.  She was home much earlier than I was, but spent more on the ride that brought her home.  As for me, I didn't get home until after 2:00 am - and was still awake 2 hours later. 

 

 

We would have been leaving on our cruise today

 

If all had gone to our original plan, we'd be on a ship headed for Nova Scotia.  However, we took a "Move Over" offer, and got a free cruise out of the deal.  (How often does a cruise get overbooked?  I don't know, but I'm glad that an offer was made to me to take another cruise for free as our compensation for the change in plans.)

So what did we plan to do instead?

We figured that we would leave for Mystic, CT for 3 mid-week days, and take a trip with me in Marian mode.  However, the hot weather forecast for the rest of the week made this trip impractical.  So, I suggested we cancel our reservations, and put the trip off until it is "cooler" outside.  Now, we're hanging out in the apartment in the flimsiest of jammies we own.

- - - - - -

Co-op business keeps getting in the way.  We had a legal issue that required the use of an attorney, and several board members treat their responsibilities as something that will occupy their time 3 hours per month.  The president of the board is getting tired, and I won't take on her responsibilities.  When the president asked for approvals during the day, I had to text some of the board, so that a majority approved using the attorney.  This is a familiar pattern of behavior, and we're tired of people who don't take up their share of the burden of running this place.

Once I get the co-op's ATM card, I will apply for a domain name for the co-op's web site.  (I will not publish it here.)  Hopefully, we will have people interested enough to write newsletters to send out, and for the co-op site to be a repository for them.  I figure that once I've used the co-op's needs to learn the basics, then I can start working on my other blog's domain name.  

 - - - - - -

Keep as cool as you can this summer....

 

 

An annoyance - just before I'm taking a cruise (a short post)

 

This is going to be a short post, as I don't know what to feel right now.

When I looked at my credit card account, I found a $2.00 charge that I couldn't explain.  I wasn't sure if it was a Patreon subscription I just selected.  But this evening, I got a message from my bank asking me to verify whether a transaction was authorized or not - it was not.  So now, I have to go through the headache of switching several auto pay charges from this closed account to the new account just opened for me.

I'm not going to worry about it right now.  I just hope that my other cards are not affected as well.  We'll see about that over the next few days.  Thankfully, this computer will have unlimited, non-streaming internet while on my upcoming cruise.

- - - - - -

On other matters....

DCD left the hospital, and again went to his ex's house.  His ex, N, texted me to say that she will drop DCD off at his mom's place in the morning, and let her deal with DCD's needs.

You can lead a person to work, but you can't make him think.

And now, on to happier things...

 

As much as I'd like to show my readers a picture of RQS smiling in this blog, I will not do so because of what once happened with someone who once was a close friend.  However, RQS would not have cruised with me in Marian Mode, had she not been comfortable with me in both gender presentations.

- - - - - -

Soon, we will be booking another cruise.  And again, we will be traveling as two women.  Assuming we take the cruise I'm planning to book, we will not even bother getting off the cruise ship.  My rights will not be protected in Florida, nor will they be protected in the Bahamas.  So, the safest place for me to be will be onboard. This is OK with the two of us.

We have booked a nice Thanksgiving dinner at a nice place.  It's not the place where we originally wanted to go.  But it is affordable, and it is a place we've wanted to try for a while.  I've already bought RQS one of her Xmas gifts, and will soon buy her another to be opened on the holiday.  However, it'll be the cruise that she'll remember most of all - my gift to her.

- - - - - -

RQS has become a member of my family for all practical purposes.  I feel very lucky that this has happened.  But who knew that 5 years after breaking up with XGFJ that I'd be with someone who accepts my transgender nature?  Yes, that period in my life hurt.  Yet, it forced me to become more independent, making myself ready to make the sacrifices needed to have a caring partner in life....

Some random thoughts

 

Right now, I'm thinking about what will happen if Trump wins the election.  And it doesn't look good for anyone in the LGBTIQ community.  Recently, I  found a map of states which have passed "Bathroom Bills", and these tend to be the states which seem the most extreme in "traditional values".  One thing I've learned over the years is that when religion becomes too powerful (or too weak) a force in society, that society becomes more authoritarian in enforcing conformity.

Does this affect me?  You bet it does!  And it could get much worse if these religious radicals get even more power in a Trump administration.

Looking at the map, I found that my going to the loo in Florida was a criminal act.  Given that all trans people need to take bio-breaks now and then, it would be risky for me to get off a cruise ship in this state. This has placed an artificial restriction on how I visit this state - if I do visit it at all.  Just because I can still visit in stealth mode doesn't mean that I want to do this.  Instead, I'll avoid this state altogether, with the exception of when RQS and I visit her sister.

- - - - - -

Right now, my brother and I are looking to file paperwork to have dual citizenship with the US and one nation in Europe.  Both of us are doing this for completely different reasons.  Yet, both of us have the same goal - to have a place to escape to if the crud hits the fan in the United States.  Could this happen?  Sadly, the answer is yes.  When I see ominous parallels between this country and the Germany of 100 years ago, I get worried. Sometimes, it's just best to be able to get out of Dodge City before sundown.

- - - - - -

Not all is gloom and doom with me.  The other day, I had an fMRI done as part of a scientific study. Now that the study is underway, I received an Amazon gift certificate which is enough for me to replace a dying TV I have in the house.  The software I have to use on a daily basis is fun to use, albeit not excitingly so.  (I guess I am no longer into video games in the way I once was when younger.) 

- - - - - -

Dealing with bureaucracy can be a big pain.  Recently, as mentioned above, my brother got a bug up his behind that we needed to accelerate the progress in getting a second passport.  To do this, we need to get official copies of our birth certificates and that of our father.  I told my brother that I needed copies of our father's death certificate (I know how large bureaucracies work with official paperwork) before I went down to the city.  He forgot to send me this paperwork, and I knew that I wouldn't be able to get our father's birth certificate for a few weeks.

My brother has way too much on his plate right nw, and he needs to feel that he's in control.  He told me of a problem that took 20 years to develop, and that he expects to clean it up in 2 years.  He may be able to clean up his firm's mess, but it will take longer for him (or someone else) to change the corporate culture that caused the problem.  He doesn't see that, as he focuses on the financial side of things and not the people side of things.

- - - - - -

RQS found a cruise to New England and Eastern Canada that we wanted to take in September.  Although I could afford to drop $1,200 on a whim, I knew that RQS spending this kind of coin now would get in her way of being able to afford next year's Alaska cruise.  After sending her some financial details, she realized that we would not be able to get the price of the cruise down to a level she could afford.  But damn!  The cruise was so near, and yet so far.

We certainly could use a cruise this winter.  I was thinking of taking a cheap MSC cruise and paying for RQS as a Christmas or Birthday present.  However, the cruises offered by MSC stop in Florida, and I certainly don't want to deal with Florida's bathroom laws while traveling as Marian.  I guess that we will need to find another trip to take early next year.

- - - - - -

When I bought my car, the salesman "helpfully" set up the radio presets in my car, as well as setting up my first service appointment.  One problem - I had to redo the presets to organize them the way I wanted and I had to schedule car maintenance earlier than he planned.  His "help" wasn't that helpful, as I now have a service appointment scheduled that I'll have to cancel soon.

While I'm thinking about my car, I shudder to think of how the auto companies will try to turn car features from purchase options to subscription options.  GM is trying to ditch Android Auto and Apple Car Ply, so that they can convert services provided by Google and Apple for FREE, and making the car owner pay for Maps, directions, etc when in the car.  I guess this may mean that I'll have to keep my car on the road longer than the 8 years I planned. 

Why do I want to replace my car within 8 years?  New York, like California is trying to force people to switch to EVs from ICE vehicles (EV- Electric, ICE - Internal Combustion Engine).  I want to buy what will likely be my last car while I can still get a gas powered vehicle.  I'll bet dollars to donuts that we will not have sufficient electric infrastructure in place to support the ICE->EV transition by 2035.  

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Enough for now.   I hope you enjoyed some of my thoughts.....

 

Ambivalence and why is can be useful

 

I've mentioned in the past that I was ambivalent about taking my last cruise before and after the cruise itself.  There were good things I could say about the cruise line/ship and bad things I could say about the cruise line/ship.  But I ended up having the same mixed feelings after taking the cruise.

Why do I mention this?

Well, I still participate in the ship's Facebook forum and post appropriate things there.  I also watch an occasional Vlogger video about their experiences on the ship and a thought came to mind: We search for meaning in the things we have done, and often need to examine the experiences of others to determine the meanings of many of our experiences.  This tendency of our species isn't as crazy as it sounds.  There are some things that need to be examined by the many, so that a common understanding can evolve.  

The other day, someone asked a GOP candidate for the presidency a simple question: "What was the root cause of the American Civil War?"  Most of us would give the simple answer: "Slavery."  But this woman couldn't do so.  Even when asked this question 10 years before, she couldn't bring herself to give this simple answer.  Why would someone have problems giving this simple answer to what should have been a "softball" question?  The answer to this question is just as simple: The base of her political supporters rejects both the cause and result of the war between the states.  And behind her non-answer is a denial of the common understanding of the war that most people in most of the 50 states have come to accept.

When 160 years have passed and a political candidate can not give the simple answer to what should be a simple question regarding our civil war, that candidate is not qualified to be president.  Hopefully, this person will never be closer to the White House than on a guided tour....

It was a long weekend, and yet it seemed so short.

 

RQS came up here on Friday and left on Monday morning. The longer we spend time together, the harder it becomes for us to leave each other at the end of the weekend.  Soon, RQS and I will be packing for a cruise to Bermuda.  It'll be our first time there, and it'll be a chance to spend time together, away from our normal activities.  

It seems like the remainder of this year will be a busy one for us.  After our cruise, RQS will be going to see her sister, while I'll be cruising to the Bahamas.  We don't know how we'll be spending Christmas and New Year's Eve.  But I expect that we'll keep being busy well into the new year.  For example, I'm looking for an excuse to take a trip to the West Coast, so that I can visit my uncle in his nursing home.  When I was there earlier in the year, he wasn't up to seeing visitors.  This time, I am looking at taking a short 3-4 day cruise out of LA, seeing my uncle either on the day before or after the cruise.

I'm not too keen on visiting Los Angeles.  It's not the easiest city to get around without a car, and I am taking a risk that my uncle may not want to see me if I decide to visit.  Yet, he's in his 90's and doesn't have many years left to live.  So, I'm hoping I can visit and see him for one last time soon....

My brother just booked a cruise.

 

I won't go into many details here, save those which do not identify my brother in any way.  This means that I won't identify him by name, the ship he will sail on, or when he will sail.  But I can tell you about how quickly he made the decision to take his first cruise.

- - - - - - 

Yesterday, I received an email from my brother containing the cruise itinerary of one of his friends.  Given that I had no warning about this, the message took me by surprise.  Later in the morning, I found that my brother left me a message on the phone to look at this itinerary to find out what I thought about it.  So I gave it some thought and came up with the following items:

1. Sailing on a new ship costs more money than sailing on an older ship.
2. Booking airfare via the cruise line can be hit or miss.  I did well with NCL booking my air for my Hawaiian cruise, even though its choice of flights may not have been what I would have chosen. Others have reported that NCL's flight bookings left much to be desired, and often had unrealistic times between flight segments.
3. The Mediterranean during peak season is hot.  Often, temperatures stay above 40°c (104°f) for days at a time.  American travelers often stick out like sore thumbs, as we look for "American" ways to deal with the heat, and not dealing with it the way the natives do.
4. His route's cruise ports are 60-120 minutes from their associated cities.  This means that he will need to plan his shore excursions carefully.

My list was longer than this, and it included details specifically related to him and his wife.  When I called my brother, he was overwhelmed by what I was saying and made an excuse to end the call.  RQS and I fleshed out the list a little mode, along with suggestions that he view some videos made by cruise vloggers we watch regularly.

This evening, I was surprised to find that he booked this cruise with less than a couple of days of thought.  He really wanted to take this cruise.  Hopefully, he'll have taken my advice in regard to booking an internet package for when he's on the ship.  (I expect that he'll keep up to date on his commitments at home.)

I'd have recommended that he take a shorter, more local cruise before taking this cruise.  However, he has a habit of trying to bite off more than he can chew.  Hopefully, he has not done so with this cruise. We'll find out sometime towards the end of 2024.

It's Getting Close

 

Soon, I'll be on another vacation.  Hopefully, the above picture will give you a clue to where I'm going, and what I'll be doing. The problem is that I'm a little ambivalent about taking this cruise.  My uncle is frail, and I'll have to take mass transit to reach him.  Additionally, I won't be able to present as Marian during this cruise.  So, it won't be as much fun as it could be. With that being said, I still think I'll have a good time.  I'll be on the West coast, and I have always felt good when in California..  And, yes, I'll catch up on my posting when I get back.  

This will be RQS's first time in California.  It's been over a decade since I've been to either San Francisco or Los Angeles, and I'm looking forward to being in both cities again.  In Los Angeles, there are a couple of museums I want to see after seeing my uncle.  In San Francisco, it'll be nice to show RQS around and to explore new places which I haven't gotten to yet. When we eventually reach San Diego, we will connect with RQS's cousin. Hopefully, we'll have enough time to see her and see a sight or two before returning to the ship. Once done with California, it will be time for the obligatory stop in Mexico for compliance with the US Passenger Vessel Services Act. Then it will back to Los Angeles and onward to home.  

Why am I ambivalent?  I think it's because there isn't that much that excites me about this itinerary.  San Francisco is not the city that I remember.  Los Angeles is still a suburb in search of a city. We will not be able to explore San Diego the way we'd like to do if we visited this city by land first. And, Mexico is Mexico - not a place that interests me.  At least, I will have the company of RQS on this trip. And that's what's important to me.

Dropping off some baggage

 

 

This is going to be a short post, as I don't have that much to say today.  RQS and I will soon be going on another cruise, and I'll be dropping my big bag off at her place.  This will make it possible for me to travel to RQS's place the day before our cruise, and then catch an Uber together to the cruise terminal the next morning.

Packing luggage for male or female modes is still an art for me.  I usually pack way too much stuff, and have gotten away with it because I've been traveling on cruise ships or on Amtrak for the past decade. Somehow, I will need to learn how to pack much lighter if I want to do more traveling, as I don't want to get hit with overweight luggage fees when flying on vacation.  Because I am a heavy person, my clothing weighs more than the average person, and I need larger bags to carry the same number of garments.

Losing weight has never been easy for me, and I wish I had never met Ex-GF-M - if only because my food addiction would never have been triggered on a daily basis.  I had lost 70 pounds in a short period of time, and gained them back when with her.  Those pounds have stayed on long since we broke up, and I have to start eating more fruit and vegetables if I'm going to have a shot at weight loss.

But enough of that.

We all have to deal with the baggage from our past.  I have to deal with the memories of things I said to my late wife out of ignorance.  I have to deal with memories of hurting a best friend because I said too much about her life.  And I have to deal with memories of many more things than I want to discuss here.  This is the baggage I'll always have with me.

One thing that my former therapist taught me is that I have to learn how to forgive myself for my screw ups. I can ask others for forgiveness, but it often can't be given.  In the case of the former friend I used to talk about too much in my blogs, she couldn't deal with the pain from her past.  Now, she demands to be in control of people and things, as she fears being hurt by the ones she loves most.  Because of things we have said, neither of us trusts each other, and there is no way to rebuild any semblance of a friendship.  So sad.

In order to move forward in life, one had to drop off baggage in the proper places to move forward.  In the literal sense, I am dropping off a bag at her place, so that I can go on a cruise with her.  In the case of my former friend, I have had to accept the fact that I screwed up, forgive myself, and move forward to new friendships.  

Hopefully, my future will be better than the past I left behind....

By the time you see this.... (a short post)

 

By the time you see this post, I'll have returned from my cruise.  I'm looking forward to getting on the ship and spending a week and a half with RQS away from our troubles.

- - - - - -

It's been a while since I've cruised with anyone, and the last cruise was a disaster.  My former cruise partner (FCP) and I had a blow out, and we never were able to patch things up.  (There is more to the story - regular readers will know what I'm talking about.)  Although FCP said that we could have recovered our friendship if the problem was just our cruise kerfuffle, I doubt that.  The troubles we experienced at the end of our cruise made it clear that I no longer wanted to ever cruise with her again.

So, it's with a little bit of worry that I go on this cruise with RQS.  Will 10 days together strengthen or weaken what we have together?  Who knows?  But she is much more level-headed as a lover and friend than FCP was as a friend.  I'm grateful that I'm with someone who has no drama in her life....

Taking a Covid test that I might need to retake.

 

As I've mentioned, I am taking a cruise in the next few days.  I had to reschedule a Covid test, as I got bad information from my cruise line, forcing me to take the PCR test one day later than planned.  However, the person at the test site said that I might not receive the results of the test until the time I'm supposed to embark on my cruise!  So I had to hunt around for a place that would do a rapid antigen test and was lucky to find one near me.

This is a minor annoyance which would have been unnecessary had we taken the next cruise with this itinerary.  Canada will no longer require vaccinated people to take Covid tests before entering their country, nor will anyone need to use the ArriveCan app before getting on a cruise. What I have to do for this cruise will not be needed anymore.  But before then, I am stuck running all over the place just before going on my cruise.  (Thankfully, I have RQS on my side - she's like having an extra right hand.)

So, I have a busy day planned for tomorrow.  First, I'll be dropping some books off at the library.  Then, I'll be driving to Yonkers to take my supervised rapid antigen test. And after picking up some cash from the ATM, I'll be off to RQS's house to stay the night before trekking to the cruise terminal.  Hopefully, I'll get there in time for a late dinner, but who knows?

Taking it easy....

 

Soon, RQS and I will be seeing this sight as we depart from New York on our Autumn cruise.  The big question I will be asking myself is: How much "Alone Time" will I need in this relationship?  I've found that I get tired of having the same people around me after a few days, and this was likely a factor for me in my breakup with XGFJ - I needed time apart from her more often than I told her.

I opened up with this thought, as I started to wonder how well RQS and I will get along on a 10 day cruise.  We will likely be OK, but I have minor worries about it.

- - - - - -

Today was a good day for me, though most of my plans went sour.  My niece and I were able to connect with each other via Zoom, and we were online for an hour chatting about things in general.  Now that I know that she prefers the use of one communications tool, we can schedule Zoom meetings at will and keep in touch.

My niece is glad that she's in England right now, and loves the early Autumn weather they are having.  Soon, winter will come, and she'll be flying back to the States with her husband.  (This assumes that her passport gets renewed before their trip. She has an expired US passport, and will need it renewed for her return.) I told her of my plans to visit sometime in the next couple of years (in Marian's female gender presentation) and she noted that I shouldn't have any problems with it when I visit.  This is a good thing, as I find it more comfortable for me to dress as Marian instead of Mario.

Although I ran my mouth at a mile a minute, we had a good chat.  Hopefully, we'll be doing it again soon.

- - - - - -

I was supposed to speak with my former student clinician for my speech therapy.  She has delivered her baby, and is up to her eyeballs taking care of her infant. So we haven't had much time to chat in a long while.  The same goes to a lesser extent for KM, a woman I used to work with at the document imaging firm.  Although I was supposed to speak with both women, it was just as well that I didn't - I was in the mood to be alone.  In many ways, I was like Greta Garbo in saying: "I want to be alone." 

As you can guess, being with people was the furthest thing from my mind today....

Counting down the days....

 

It's less than a week until we go on our cruise, and I'm getting a little nervous about this trip.  In the past, I'd be concerned about whether I'd get to the cruise terminal on time.  I'd be concerned about whether I'd be able to feel comfortable traveling with someone else in my cabin.  And I'd be concerned whether my travel companion would need too much of me to have a good time on the cruise.  (FCP wanted to see me in the casino occasionally while she gambled, and she gave me a Double Sawbuck ($20) that I ran up to $360 on one trip.  XGFJ wanted me to go swimming with her on the cruise line's private island, while I wanted to sit and read my books.)  This trip, I'll get to see how RQS and I get along, and how much she'll need of me while I try to relax.

This trip makes me a little more nervous than usual.  When I took my last cruise at Christmastime, I was worried that I might contract Covid-19 before the cruise.  The Omicron variant started to spread quickly, and what was supposed to be a maskless cruise changed into one where we were supposed to be wearing masks in all public places, save when one was eating or having a casual drink.  Even though I am vaccinated and double boosted, I still have concerns about having a positive test result.  Given the strange nature of Covid-19, one can be asymptomatic, test positive, and not go on the cruise.  Even worse, I could be symptomatic and have to quarantine at home.

For the most part, I am looking forward to this trip.  There's a part of me that wants to go to DC again, this time as Marian.  (I'd have to bring Mario's clothes with me, as I would likely have to treat her cousin and his wife to dinner - returning the favor they showed us on our last trip.)  Two people I know live in the DC area, and it would be nice to see them again as Marian.  Hopefully, we can do this next year, time and money permitting....

Am I dreaming? If so, don't wake me.

 

Lately, I've been writing about the mundane things in life.  After a transgender person gets the courage to go out and about in the world, one's day to day experiences return to being just everyday experiences. Some of these experiences are social, and others are related to the configuration of one's body.  Once these experiences have become common enough, one doesn't think about them much.

Although RQS thinks of me as her boyfriend who likes to dress funny (and I'm comfortable with being this way), she also sees me as someone that she can share typical "girly" experiences with - such as going for a mani-pedi.  After getting used to seeing me present as a female, she has gotten very comfortable with me this way and will occasionally show me subtle public displays of affection.

RQS wants me to keep my male body configuration, and only use prosthetics to create my feminine body shape.  (She doesn't mind me getting electrolysis to remove my facial and body hair.  It's going the next step that bothers her.)  And I can live with that to have a good romantic relationship.  So far, things are going much better than expected.  RQS has suggested that the two of us get made up by a professional, then dress to the nines, and go out somewhere fancy.  This will not happen until after we get back from our cruise.  

Could this be a dream?  If so, I don't want to wake up.

Thoughts on a VCR and on Travel

 

Ever since I started pulling wires to disconnect my old DVD player and connect a new one, I have not yet been able to get my old VCR to work.  The VCR is rarely used, but I want to be able to use it once in a while to play a tape of my late wife and I on a TV show.  As much as I'm starting to care for RQS, I will always miss my late wife and how she made my life better.

Although I think I have everything set up right, I know that I'm overlooking something.  I am very lucky to have had this poor quality recording, as it is all I have left of my wife, save for a few tiny pictures.  In the future, all there will be left of me will be a few pictures and the remnants of my thoughts on the blog entries I've posted.  This is normal in life.  From dust to dust, as they say....

Right now, I feel I have a few more good years left in my life.  Over the next two or three years, I plan to go on at least three to five more cruises, plus do some more land trips that I never have had the time or money to do in the past. For example, I will be doing another New England/Eastern Canada cruise soon.  And shortly afterwards, I'll be doing a Hawaii cruise on my own.  If all goes right, sometime next year, I will be doing a Panama Canal cruise with RQS.  Then I hope that we will be able to take some trips to South America (think: cruising by the Tierra del Fuego), Iceland, and Great Britain (with a Westbound crossing on the Queen Mary 2). At that point, I have to determine how much money we can spend on travel while we are both healthy enough to take bucket list trips.

When I went on my last cruise, the ship I was on had only 2 US type electric sockets.  In today's world, this is not enough.  By watching one vlog, I found out that the ship we're cruising on has USB ports on both sides of the bed.  If that's true, we will not need to play games with the extension core I use for my CPAP machine.  

It's nice to know that no matter what happens, that the world will keep moving forward when I'm long gone.  Let's hope that time does not come soon....

Accomplishing much and nothing at the same time.

 

If I could find the original negative for the above picture, I'd develop a larger photo from it and frame thhe picture.  This is how I remember the lighthouse at Peggy's Cove, and it's how I'd like to see it when I visit again.

Why do I mention this?

RQS and I have been talking about going on a cruise to New England and Canada's Maritime Provinces.  Halifax, NS will be one of our stops on the cruise, and I will insist on visiting Peggy's Cove while we are in port.  However, until I decide to leave my job, I can't tell RQS that it's time to book the cruise.

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Today, I was trying to stay awake during my shift at the office. While there, someone had moved a non functioning refrigerator into the center of the break room, so that a replacement unit could be slid into the spot occupied by the old unit.  Now, we will have enough room to cold store our lunches, instead of trying to cram them all into a small refrigerator that didn't have enough room for all of us.

After work, it was off to the dentist's office for a tooth cleaning.  This was the least expensive visit I have had for a while.  Afterwards, I ended up going home to do laundry.  What an exciting evening!  Not much was done today, and yet, I got some needed things done....

Sometimes, I skip a day or two of blogging

Unlike many people, I do have a life outside of blogging.  It may not be much of a life (as FCP would likely hector me now if we were talking to each other), but it is my life.

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Lately, RQS and I have been discussing taking a cruise together.  But before I book such a cruise, I have to know whether she can accept me in Marian Mode as well as in the Mario Mode which she is accustomed to seeing me present myself.  And this means that RQS will finally get to see, in person, me presenting myself as a female.

Yet, this isn't getting in the way of my blogging.  Instead, it's because I am exhausted at the end of my work day.  This is also the reason I haven't been able to clean up my apartment in the way I'd like to.  Luckily, I've had a little free time in which I had the energy to do something, and I did just that.  Yes, it's just a start.  But it is some meaningful movement in the right direction.

Tonight, I had planned to do a big of cleaning in the living room.  Did I do it?  Not much.  But I did accomplish something that made things look like I could get the mess cleaned in a big Friday night session.  And if I didn't have to look at my computer before going to sleep, I wouldn't have even written this much....

Bahamas Cruise - Day 8 (Debarkation)

 

I woke up very early and packed.  Part of me wished I could safely go back to sleep.  But I knew better.  If I had taken the opportunity to go back to sleep at 5:00 am, I'd have missed the above shot, as the ship made its way through New York harbor.

When 7:00 am came, I made my way to the main dining room, and had a leisurely breakfast.  About an hour later, I said goodbye to some of the staff there, and made my way to the atrium to wait.  This was not a day to wear a dress - unless it was treated as a longish tunic.  And that's what I did.  I didn't stand out. Eventually, my luggage tag color was called (there were not many of us), and I made my way off the ship for the last time, and into the ship terminal.

Entering the terminal, I knew that my large bag should be in the "gray" luggage section.  But it wasn't.  This could be a big problem for me!  I had so much stuff that would be impossible to replace at short notice in that bag.  Thankfully, I asked for assistance.  And 20 minutes later, my suitcase was found. Then it was off to customs (where there were only 3 stations servicing our ship's passengers) where I waited on line for another 15 minutes before being free to catch a cab outside.  You'll notice that I hadn't mentioned that I have masculine ID, but was presenting as a female.  I've done this enough times, that it's not a big deal to me or the customs agent.  Hopefully, newcomers to our "tribe" will see this and overcome their fears of traveling in their authentic gender.

The cab ride back to Grand Central was uneventful, save that I noticed that the "clock" wasn't ticking.  I ended up getting charged the same for my ride to Grans Central, as I was charged "on the clock" coming from Grand Central.  (I'll have to ask if there's a flat rate from the cruise ship terminal to certain NYC destinations.)  And I was again lucky - I had 15 minutes to find the train to Croton.  And less than 90 minutes later, I was home....

 

PS:  It seems as if I accidentally grabbed someone else's "App-Hailed" ride.  This explains the flat rate of $20 to go from the Cruise Terminal to Grand Central.

PPS: It was so much nicer at the end of this cruise NOT to be concerned about a former cruise partner's feelings about waking up early on debarkation day.