Here's one cruise ship I won't sail on with a friend

Above is a screen clipping from a blogger whose posts I read now and then.  This woman cruises on the cheap and provides advice to people on how to take more cruises for less.  In this case, she notes the most unusual "bathroom" layout she's found on a cruise ship.

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Most cruise ships use a bathroom layout similar to that pictured on the left.  There is a toilet, a shower stall, and a sink in the same compartment.  Once in that compartment, one has complete privacy.  This is not the case on the Norwegian Epic, whose bathroom layout is illustrated on the right. The picture below should give you a better idea of how this looks from the inside.

What bothers me most about this layout is that I would have no privacy if a friend entered/exited the room while I was showering or relieving myself.  There is little reason for a layout like this, save to skimp on passenger space.

And this leads to the selection of a potential cruise partner.  Having cruised alone, and with 3 different women, I've learned that being in close quarters with the same person for a week (or more) can be better than sailing alone, or much worse than sailing alone.

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I have taken only 2 cruises by myself.  The first was a solo cruise to Alaska after losing my wife to cancer.  The second was an 11 day cruise to the Caribbean where I had a great time on the ship and made a couple of new friends.  Both of these cruises were taken in an inside cabin, and the only thing I can remember about the first cruise ship was how dark it was when the lights were out.  With the second ship, I don't remember the cabin much at all.  This, I think, was related to the mood I was in before taking the cruise.

My second cruise was taken with the girlfriend I had met shortly after losing my wife.  We were joining another couple who was celebrating their honeymoon and invited us to join then on the cruise.  (No, two couples, two separate rooms.)  I have stories I can tell about this cruise, but can't remember much about the ship, save for the main dining room where they served Baked Alaska on the cruise's final night. Then there was the cruise to Florida and the Bahamas I took with another (now) ex-girlfriend.  This was not a good cruise for the two of us to take, as it illustrated the problems that two people with two different styles would have being together - the activities on board and on shore days were not those that would bring the two of us closer together. Lastly, there were the cruises I took with my former cruise partner.  Although we had very different interests, we meshed well on all but one cruise.  We did different things, and got together for dining and for shows.  (I won't go into any detail regarding the last cruise we took together, as that was problematic from before the start. Even my Ex-Girlfriend said that going on that cruise was a big mistake for both of us, reminding me that I didn't want to go in the first place.  The former cruise partner was lonely, and needed something I could not give her in my role as a friend.)  Because I wasn't expected to entertain this partner, we got along well for our good cruises.  But on this last cruise, she exploded as she was dealing with too many stressors, with an action of mine catalyzing the explosion.  (I hope she does better with her next cruise partner.)

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Finding a compatible cruise partner can be hard.  First, you have to know whether the two of you have compatible personal habits.  ("How much space does he/she use in a cabin?"  "Is this person messy?" "Does this person snore?" are among the questions I might ask.)  Then, you may want to know whether that person needs to be "entertained" while on the cruise.  For example, I can do shore excursions by myself, and I can do them with someone.  But they have to be ones I want to do, and they will usually be ones I haven't done before.  You'll want to know whether a person is a night owl or an early bird.  This is important for the last night of the cruise, as the ship's crew is trying to get everyone off the ship as early as possible the next morning, so that they can make up the rooms for the next group of passengers.  (Who wants to hear complaints from someone who doesn't share the same sleep/wake cycle as you when dealing with the stresses of disembarkation and going home?)

Once you find this travel partner, get as much travel in as possible.  Cruises, land travel, etc. are fun, and best done with a friend.  Some of my best trips were shared with someone close to me.  Even now, I can still chuckle about a summer trip we took where we stayed in a hotel without air conditioning. (We didn't need it.)  I still want to return to a hotel on the banks of the Merced river, just outside of Yosemite park, where I stayed with a then girlfriend.  And I wish I could have traveled more with my wife while she was alive.  Now that I can have both money and time, I expect that I will be traveling again soon.  And I hope to have a friend with me with whom I can build memories.



What advice would you give to someone regarding travel partners?

 

 

We all have baggage!

I can still remember when people with money traveled with steamer trunks like the one pictured above.  These were sturdy items meant to take abuse - and many of these cases did.  Although I'm going on a cruise soon, the days of these trunks are long gone, and many have been repurposed for use as furniture. Even the luggage I had up to a couple of years ago is obsolete, as the goal now is to make a suitcase as strong and light as possible.  This allows a person to carry more items (usually clothing) in a suitcase, and still not get hit with overweight charges when taking a flight.

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Today, I am thinking of the problems I might have when I tall one woman that I live a good portion of my life as Marian.  Will she run away, as several other women have done?  Or, will she be intrigued?  How do I phrase things as not to scare this woman off?  The woman I want to reveal myself to has baggage of her own.  She has taken on a responsibility that few women would accept - all to help two people who are not in a position to help themselves yet.  So there might be a positive ending, if we could see things through to a positive ending. 

Right now, it's been over 2 years since a woman has shared a bed  with me, and I miss the experience.  Yet, this period has been one of growth.  I've had to learn NOT to lean on two people I once depended on - and I've come out OK.  (I wonder how well one of them is doing - but I'm not going to ask about it.)  It seems that losing important people in my life causes emotional growth spurts for which I see things differently at the end of the process.  

- - - - - -

I have more baggage than just being Marian.  But I only plan to show it to someone who is comfortable trusting me enough to see all of her baggage.  I wonder how long it will take for that to happen....

I sent out a letter

The other day, I sent out a letter to someone I once had as a close friend.  Although I was the person who caused the rift two years ago, I was recently pissed at her for  cursing me out for no real reason.  She perceived a slight from me when I disagreed with her labeling of an action of hers as a favor when it wouldn't be considered such by most people.  I figured that I'd bide my time, and waited to send my response to her.  

Now, my recent letter wasn't nasty.   No longer was I going to be apologetic for what I did, now that 2 years have passed. If we hadn't found a way to rebuild a burnt bridge, then why keep trying?  Instead, I simply needed to get some things off my chest other than my falsies.  Sadly, she is the type to anger easily, and never consider a form of reconciliation.  (No, I'm not looking for a friendship.  Instead, I just wanted to say a couple of things I felt she needs to hear.)  Nor is she the type to listen to what someone else has to say when she feels slighted.  Thankfully, there never was any sexual chemistry between us - I'd hate to have lived with her "Sturm und Drang" under the same roof.

Do I miss this ex-friend?  Sometimes, but not often.  I miss her even less now after she tried to make me feel bad for not having her in my life. There are times that I want to share something, then realize that this person is no longer in my life and not available for sharing. (I scattered the ashes of that former friendship months ago.)  Luckily, I have enough people in my life with whom I can share things, and I don't need this person anymore.

This ex-friend once thanked me for introducing her to another of my acquaintances, but did it in a way which felt like she was trying to rub salt into old open wounds. (This acquaintance now knows of what happened at the end of summer, and of this letter.) It would be nice if this ex-friend would think of how other people would think of her words and actions before doing anything, instead of speaking or acting on impulse.  Maybe, she might get the happiness she wants and deserves in life.  I hope she finds this happiness soon.  I just won't be there to see it.

 

 

Happy Birthday Someone!

 

I accidentally deleted my original entry for the day.  However, I found this birthday card, and picked it up because it reflected my sense of humor.

In many ways, birthdays don't mean that much to me. The reason they don't is that I rarely had someone to celebrate them with.  As a youth, I didn't have many friends.  In middle age, my wife had passed away, and there was no stable relationship with a person who cared to mark this day with me.  And now, its only meaning is to note how much closer I am to death.

Recently, I booked a cruise, and looked at the travel insurance price charts. Each year I get older, I have to pay more for the insurance I need for the cruise.  Then, I thought about turning 65, and having to enroll in Medicare.  So many things start to kick in as one gets older.  Social Security Full Retirement Age (FRA) Distribution starts for me at 66 1/2, and I have to start taking Required Minimum Distributions (RMDs) by the time I turn 72.  Each year denotes something, and not all of them are pleasant.

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There is a person whom I'd wish a Happy Birthday to, that I am no longer in contact anymore.  (She has said things about me that I won't repeat here - her anger regarding a screw up of mine hasn't dissipated in over 2 years.)  Hopefully, she'll see this and enjoy the sentiment of the card above.  

At least, I found this card funny....

As they say - Getting old is better than the alternative....

I broke down and bought something I could use at work.

Normally, I would not bother buying an MP3 player, as I already own a cell phone which can play MP3 files.  However, I figure that as long as I'm working where I work, it makes sense for me to listen to music (or radio) via an MP3 player which is unable to be used for taking pictures ot recording images.

Given that Apple no longer supports its original iPod music players, only 3rd tier Chinese manufacturers are producing units that suit my needs.  And that suits me fine.  This unit comes with all I need to carry my complete music collection with me when I go to work.  And even if I leave this job soon, I can carry it with me when I'm eventually called in for jury duty.  (The judges do not want people waiting in the jury selection area to be bothered by phones ringing, disturbing the selection process.)

I figure that having a unit like this will serve a limited function for a limited amount of time.  And that's fine with me, as I am tired of not having any stimulation while sitting at my work station.

 

PS: I had to return this unit, as it didn't play files saved in my iTunes format (M4A).
PPS: I ordered a replacement that plays M4A files.
 

 

We're off to see the Wizard!

 

I'm not a fan of this movie.  Yet, I consider it one of the great films of its era.  Not only does it have excellent cinematography, and special effects. But it also has great performances, including those by Frank Morgan.  (He plays several roles in this movie.)  And I finally had the chance to see it on the big screen today.

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When I go on dates with MWL, it's always in Mario Mode.  This is not a problem for me.  Being able to be Marian most of the time has made me more comfortable being Mario.  And this made it possible for me to make it to her place in time to then make the theater on time.  Unfortunately, even with 7 hours of sleep, I was having trouble staying awake.  (Now, I'm having problems staying awake in theaters - Similar to one person I once knew....)  Yet, I enjoyed the parts of the film I was awake for.

After the movie ended, we went to a nearby Greek restaurant for a bite to eat.  All the food we ate was excellent.  But I wouldn't have served pita bread in small slices.  Instead, I'd have had big slices of pita, so that the meat and greens could be eaten as a form of sandwich.  Other than that, I have no negative criticisms of the place.  The grilled octopus was excellent, and was a great opening for the souvlaki we each had.

There is a part of me that wanted to trek into NYC for a Marian Mode day on my own.  But I'll be cruising that way soon enough, and I can't wait for that trip....

I'm Thinking. I'm Thinking....

There's an old joke told about Jack Benny.  One day he was attacked by a mugger who put a knife to his throat and said:

"Your money, or your life."

Jack paused for a minute, and the mugger shouted:

"WELL????"

And Jack said:

"I'm Thinking.  I'm Thinking...."

In real life, Jack Benny was a very generous fellow.  And Jack had to give his friends money to pay restaurant bills when he was around, as too many people on wait staffs wanted to be able to say that they were "stiffed by Jack Benny."

So what does Jack Benny have to do with this post?

Like Jack, I can say "I'm thinking.  I'm thinking!" in regard to booking my Hawaii cruise.  Tonight, I had dinner with a friend, and we talked for hours.  She thought that I had already booked this cruise, and I said that at a current price of roughly $6,000 for an inside cabin, $6,450 for an ocean view cabin, $8,350 for a balcony cabin, and $11,250 for a mini suite, putting money down over a year before the scheduled sailing seems a little risky to me.  

I am hoping by the time this cruise sets sail that I will have another travel partner. This will allow me to save $1,400 to $5,100, not having to pay for a second person not sailing in the cabin with me.  So far, I have some good signs that I may have one or two people who may future travel partners.  But none are ready to make any commitments yet.  And that's OK with me.

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This is another cruise I'd like to take.  Starting at £3,300 pp (dbl. occ.), it is a little steep.  But then, this is a luxury cruise on a small ship able to reach Iceland's smaller ports. 

If I have a sudden influx of cash, I will book this cruise before I book a Panama Canal cruise.  Many people I know have made either partial or full transits of the Canal.  But not many people I know can say that they've been to Iceland and enjoyed the nation's hospitality.  Like Hawaii, not many ships give travelers a good idea of what this island is all about.  In Hawaii, it's because American law gives one ship a monopoly of sailing both in and out of Honolulu on the same cruise.  In Iceland, it's because this island is only a stop or two on a longer European cruise.  

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There are two more bucket list cruises I'd like to take: (1) Antarctica and (2) The Galapagos Islands.  But these cruises will cost even more than going to Iceland.  So I haven't even bothered pricing them out for this post.  As you can guess, I have a healthy travel bucket list, and I may just be able to cross a couple of trips of this list within the next 2 or 3 years.

 

I decided to break out a new wig tonight.

This has been my go-to wig for a while.  When new, it does wonders for my face.  When worn out, it cries for replacement.  Today, I broke out my replacement wig and wore it to dinner.  No, I an not going to stop using my old wig for a while.  I intend to continue wearing it to work until the end of the month.

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As much as I want to replace this wig in my usual color, I decided to go a shade darker to see how it looks on me.  This wig will likely not make it to work for a while.  Instead, I will wear it less often, so it can last a while.  But I will replace the old wig in its color the next time it goes on sale at one of my usual online outlets.

Years ago, my former cruise partner criticized me for wanting to keep wearing an old wig until "My" expiration date - 3 (or 4) months after start of daily use.  There are two equally valid points of view here.  First, I allocate so much money in my budget for wigs each year. And if I break out a wig earlier than planned, I will need to replace it earlier than planned.  Since no one on a cruise ship will ever see me again after a cruise, who cares if they think I'm having a bad hair day?  The other viewpoint involves her wanting me to look my best, and damn the costs involved.  Give in to this urge too easily, and one will be buying expensive human hair wigs and not getting one's money worth from these purchases.  And to make the equation more interesting, my former friend wanted me to buy my wigs from the same places which supply human hair wigs to Ultra Orthodox Jewish women.  They are of the highest quality, and their prices reflect that quality.

The price/value equation for wigs was always a point of contention between me and my former cruise partner.  And I was not going to let her dictate to me how I should spend my money.  So, when I compute the cost per wear for these wigs over a two year period, I find that I get the same value by replacing wigs every 3 months that I might get from replacing a human hair wig every 2 years.  Yes, the human hair wig should last longer if properly cared for.  But I know that I am tough on my wigs, and would likely ruin a human hair wig early in its use.  So why spend good money on a wig that I couldn't maintain properly?

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There are less expensive human hair wigs that I could buy.  But I haven't seen any in a large cap that I could style to my liking.  If I were to buy one of these wigs, it would need to be a special occasion wig, for use at weddings and other important occasions.  Since I don't go to too many of these soirees, it doesn't make much sense to buy one.

What do you think?
 

Since grand juries are in the news lately....

 

In mid 2017, I was called up for Federal Grand Jury duty. This wouldn't be such a bad thing, save that I had to be up by 5:30 am to make it to Lower Manhattan (Pearl Street) by 8:30 am.  If I lived in Putnam, Dutchess, or Orange counties, I'd have served only in White Plains - a much easier trip for me.  But this option wasn't available.  So I traveled into NYC, and was lucky not to be called on to serve.  Given that they expected this jury to meet 2-3 times per week and to serve for 18-24 months, I was very lucky indeed.  

This should have exempted me from serving for 2 years.  Sure enough, 2 years later, I was called to serve again - this time on a "regular" jury.  Since I  was starting work at the census bureau, I didn't want to lose any money by taking the lower paid service on the court.  So I asked for a deferment and got it.  Then, the pandemic struck, and all jury calls were deferred until the pandemic eased off (or when government could figure out how to have people serve in the middle of a pandemic).  This gave me another year that I was able to avoid jury service.  And then, I got the above summons that called me in to serve in early July.  

I applied for my second deferment and got it.  Now, I'm hoping that I get called on to serve during the winter, as the subways will be much more comfortable than in the summer.  If the summons comes as expected (6 months after a deferment is requested), I should get a call for service in late December to serve in January.  And then, I'll be glad to serve - especially, given that I'll be in Marian Mode throughout my service.

You know you're tired when....

 

You know you're tired when you skip lunch at work to close your eyes and rest for 30 minutes.  I was fighting hard to stay awake, and was using every trick in the book to stay awake enough to do my job until quitting time.  Luckily, I was able to catch a second wind with the help of coffee, and catch up on things before leaving for the day. By the time I got home, I was ready to fall asleep.  Yet, I couldn't pass out until talking with MWL.  And even, half asleep, I was able to make plans with her and CWS for the weekend.

By the time I fell asleep for the first time at night, it was roughly 9pm.  But I kept waking up several times during the night.  Hopefully, I'll be able to be wide awake for work during the day....

Wings!

 

The origin of the Buffalo Wing is rather humble.  However, no one seems to agree on which origin story is true.  I figure that the most likely place where the dish originated was at the Anchor Bar in Buffalo, NY.  However, this is in dispute.

Tonight, I went to a meetup at the White Plains Buffalo Wild Wings franchise,  The chain has a simple, basic bar menu - and lots of choices for spicing the wings.  This is not a place where I'd trust Fish & Chips if it were on the menu.  But I'd trust a Cheeseburger there, if I weren't in the mood for wings.

This meetup group has several regulars, including at least one person who is visually impaired.  Tonight, two attendees were using canes, even though both had partial sight.  So it was interesting to see how these two people functioned among the sighted.  What was more interesting was that in one meetup group, that this legally blind person was asked NOT to bring his seeing eye dog.  What F'ing nerve!!!  

The issue of service animals came up when I mentioned the problem our co-op has had with Emotional Service Animals (ESAs) and people who want to use this designation to have a pet in a pet-free building.  I was pleasantly surprised to find that this blind man supported my view that an Emotional Support Animal should go through the same kind of intensive training to be considered a service animal that performs a therapeutic function for its owner.  

All too early, I had to leave the group - I had 2 loads of laundry to get done, and not enough time left to do it.  Luckily, I got home early enough to get my loads in before my laundry basket turned into a pumpkin.

And now, something somewhat different.

 

There is something about the book "Soppy" that I love.  Is it the drawings?  Maybe. Is it the minimal use of words to convey the author's point?  Probably.  Is it the sentimentality about the mundane issues of courtship and living together?  This is a definite Yes!  Philippa Rice created a book that I find very touching.

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I can still remember how I felt being married.  I loved being able to share a quiet meal with my wife, knowing that neither of us had to say much of anything to communicate how much we cared for each other.  I thought I had this in a more recent relationship, but I was wrong. She needed to hear things much more than I felt comfortable saying them.  (She didn't complain about it. If you don't ask for something, you won't get it. And she didn't.) Yet, I still hope that I can find someone with whom I have that "quiet" communication, and settle down with her.  This will be much harder with me being TG.  But I can hope....

Recently, the same author has done a book about having a baby.  Although I haven't had the chance to view pages from this book, I expect that it will be along the same lines as Soppy - pleasantly sentimental, but touching on the mundane things that are not that romantic.  Maybe, I'll get this new book from the library to see what the author thinks of babies....

I wish I had hips....

 

One of the problems that I have with my body is that I don't have the hips to wear certain garments.  When the above dress was new, I looked OK from the top up.  But my hips left a lot to be desired.  I had no natural curves.  This dress has long since been retired, and yet, I'll always have the same problem as I did several years ago - my hips are not wide enough to meet the proportions of a typical woman of my age and size.

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Over the years, I have learned to dress appropriately for a woman my age.  And that includes wearing more traditionally masculine garments such as trousers.  But I prefer to wear the feminine versions of these garments.  Over time, for example, I have grown to feel much more comfortable carrying a handbag and not looking for items in my pockets.  So it has now become strange for me to wear any garments with pockets, save when I'm in Mario mode.  And, about the only time I've been in Mario mode these days is when I see my internist, my dates, and my family. On these days, the feeling of male garments is noticeably different that what I normally wear during the week.  

The other day, one woman started to ask me about the women in my wife - as if she needed a scorecard to keep them straight.  But then, I am very unusual, as I am a genetic male who finds females more interesting to have as friends than to have as bed partners.  And, if I had my choice, I would have been born as a cisgender female, so that I could partake of the richness of emotional experiences open to women.  This comes at a big price, and no one should forget it.  Females are often ignored because of their gender.  They are bullied (or worse) by males, as they have less body and muscle mass.  And they have all the major headaches of reproduction. Cisgender males have no idea how easy it is for them....

With all that being said, right now, I simply wish I had nice hips, so that my clothes would look better on me.

What do you do with an old wig when it's worn out?

 

It's too bad I can't do voice impersonations with the written word.  If I could, I'd be channeling Rod Serling's voice and doing a Twilight Zone type of introduction to this entry. Sadly, I can't, and will try to do my best with this limitation.

- - - - - -

Over the years, I have had to replace my wigs on a regular basis.  When I was out and about as Marian once or twice during the week, I replaced my wigs every 6 months or so.  These days, with almost daily use, I tend to replace my wigs every 3-4 months, usually having at least one emergency wig in reserve. Yet, I'm usually left with a wig that's serviceable, but not one that makes me look my best.  So what should I do with it?

Right now, I have a collection of several old wigs that should either be thrown out or restyled for other uses.  They are all in the same style, as there are very few large cap wigs that fit my head and look good on me.  Yet, I can do something with a few of them.  But what?

I expect that I will soon throw away most of the older wigs, keeping one or two for use as backups when I go on cruises.  (Why wear a good wig when going into the hot tub?)  But until then, they will be collecting dust in a dark part of my closet....

I'm already thinking of booking another cruise.

 

I miss the world we were in when this picture was taken.  I had met both a pen pal AND a Vegas performer on this trip, and had a great time sailing alone.  This was a growth experience for me, as I was unable to lean on anyone for emotional support.

- - - - - -

The cruise I'll soon be taking will be fun.  But it will not be much "to write home about".  I was totally bored in one of these ports, and didn't bother to tender to the island in the other.  When a cruise line has to tender its guests to a private island instead of using its own dock, bottlenecks will happen.  And on the one time I was at this line's private island, they had a hard time getting on and off the island due to the weather.

If my cruise wasn't visiting Charleston, SC instead of Nassau, Bahamas, I wouldn't have taken it.  Nassau was only worth the stop if one wanted to waste time shopping for overpriced goods.  Port Canaveral was far from anything interesting or reasonably priced.  But Charleston is a more than adequate place to stop, as it has history worth taking in.  (Fort Sumter is the place where many consider our Civil War to have started.)

Unlike the cruise I took 3 years ago, the pandemic will always seem to be present in the background. When I get to the cruise terminal, I will be Covid tested before I get on the ship. Cruise staff will both be vaccinated and masked.  All passengers will also be vaccinated. Even if masking isn't required of passengers, most will likely be wearing them out of habit. It could be worse.  Could you imagine being on a mixed (vaxxed/unvaxxed) cruise and having to mask up at all times, then worry about which areas one can visit and what areas one must avoid?

Yet, the minor headaches of dealing with the pandemic haven't kept me from considering another cruise. Right now, I'm think of booking some sort of Hawaii trip.  But I could change that to an Alaskan trip at a moment's notice.  Until I am ready to make a commitment, I won't put any money down on a vacation.  Instead, I'll be tracking prices and hoping they go down.

Unfortunately, prices don't always go down.  Although the price of the cruise I'm taking dropped by $250 shortly after I booked the cruise, it is now the same price as when I booked it - under a slightly different pricing structure.  And therein lies the problem.  I'm not sure of how I can best perform price arbitraging on either a Hawaii or Alaska cruise.  But I want to do so to get the best price available over the next year.  And I hope I can do this effectively....   

Another Short Post

 

I don't have much to say today, save that I was fighting to stay awake after my third cup of coffee wore off.  Somehow, it's either my costume jewelry or my outfits that are getting positive comments from women, and I'm glad to receive them.  My sense of style is maturing, and I'm glad to be out there in the world.

With this being said, I decided to go through some storage containers to look for some dresses I received in Universal Standard's yearly Mystery Box sale.  I figure that I'll wear one of them to work in the morning (with a pair of leggings).  But if I don't like what I see, I'll switch to one of the dresses I've already worn with leggings, and enjoy the rest of the day.

Right now, I figure that I can safely wear dresses as over long tunics and fit in.  This is not the kind of place where women wear dresses in the winter - except, maybe, the way I'll be wearing them for a few weeks.  After that, it's back to trouser like garments again, with tunic tops above.

Thankfully, I'll be back in dresses for my next cruise....

Zooming with a friend in Texas

 

There is an indirect link between this character from the movie "Short Circuit" and the friend I was Zooming with today.  But I won't say what that link is....

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As I've said in earlier posts, I used to connect with friends in Texas during the worst of the pandemic. Our Zoom meetings were fun, but they didn't take the place of in-person meetings.  Now that people are getting out and about, there is little need for Zoom, save for people who live across the country from each other.

It's been a while since I've chatted with my friend.  Too bad that we no longer live near each other.  We would have had a lot of fun together.  But Zoom keeps us in contact, and we schedule a meeting every so often to catch up on things.  

- - - - - -

One of these days, I'll have to meet my friend in person again - in a city that the two of us want to visit. We've talked about Chicago, as well as some cities in the West.  Since she's young enough to be my daughter, I can guarantee that nothing would come of this other than a nice friendly get together.  Who knows?  I might just tell her about my transgender nature....

Another short entry

 

There was a presentation on my company's 2022 health care plan today. And I'm not sure if I should sign up for the company plan in next week's open enrollment, or whether I should continue paying my own way for health care.  Going with the company plan may save me $450/month in insurance payments, but might cost me in two ways: (1) Locking me into a job I don't like until Medicare kicks in, and (2) Costing me more in drug prices and medical co-payments. I won't go into details here, but I am leaning towards going with the company plan.  Unfortunately, I don't have much time to make a decision.

My firm was gobbled up by a larger firm at the beginning of the year. The smaller firm did not offer a health care plan I considered worth the money - I decided to continue purchasing my health insurance on the Obamacare exchange in New York.  The larger firm had more negotiating power, and got a better deal for its employees.  So this got me thinking about a simple question:

Why should the quality and amount of healthcare provided to a person be dependent on the employer that s/he works for?

This is something that bothers me, as the system we have here in the USA seems to be designed to have sub-optimal outcomes.  So several more questions come to mind:

Why should an employer be involved in negotiating health insurance coverage?

Why can't an employer subsidize an employee's health care in a way similar to non-taxed reimbursements for employee education at a local college?

Why shouldn't the final consumer of the health insurance product (the employee) be the one exposed to deciding which company's insurance product to buy, when "Apples to Apples"  comparisons can be made on the Obamacare exchanges?

Why can't ALL Obamacare exchange products provide nationwide coverage?

The answer to most of these questions are either political or historical.  We would be better served if corporations would get out of the business of buying healthcare for their employees, and if government would ensure that healthcare firms only sold policies that met minimum requirements.  We were on the way to doing this until Trump screwed things up by allowing "short term" plans to be sold instead of Obamacare exchange policies.  This allowed insurers to provide insurance that wasn't worth much, but gave buyers the illusion of getting value.  Yet, Obamacare has provided a path to a long term solution.

Since it's late at night and I can't do this topic justice, I will elaborate on it in more detail at a later date.

 

It's Raining!

Yesterday, the weather forecast said that we would get a heavy rain starting tonight and running into overmorrow (an unfortunately obsolete English word meaning: the day after tomorrow).  Given that the forecast calls for 6 inches of rain falling between now and then, I do not plan to "dress pretty" when I go to work for the next 2 days.

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I had some errands I wanted to do after work today, and I was unable to do them, as I wanted to be home before the rains started.  Instead of doing these tasks, I decided to catch up with some people with whom I've been out of contact with for months.

Luckily, I saw that the closet rod in the closet holding my female wardrobe still is in place.  But leaving it in place is only a short term way of dealing with a problem - I need a new rod with a center support, so that I can't overload the rod anymore.  Right now, this is my excuse to fill another "Donation Bag."  and I'm preparing to donate clothes which no longer fit my style and taste.

When I extracted clothes for my first 2 donation bags, I found that I had clothes that I had bought almost a decade ago that I haven't worn in years.  Some of these garments are hard to let go of.  For example, I had 2 Lands End skirts that don't fit my needs anymore.  If I knew I'd be wearing them, I'd keep them in my closet.  But out they go!  The same goes for old shoes and other accessories I don't wear.  Now, I wear clothes which minimize my male pattern body, and emphasize the feminine parts that I should show off.  (Ex-GF-M always said that I have a great pair of legs, so I try to wear clothes which show them off.)

By the time I'm done, I may have 4, 5 or 6 donation bags to go to a good cause.  However, I try not to think of how much money I've spent on women's clothes which do not fit me well enough to keep.  At least, spending this money allowed me to learn what works and what doesn't work on my body.  Cisgender women learn this while they are young Transgender women usually learn this when they are older.  Thankfully, these lessons didn't break the bank....

 

Today, I saw a wonderful old film in a theater older than the film.

This is the kind of theater in which classic films are meant to be seen.  And that's what I did today.

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Yesterday, MWL called me to let me know that she was feeling under the weather and wouldn't be able to get together.  Later on, she noted that a local theater was starting to show films again, and had a showing of Frankenstein scheduled for 1 pm.  So, I marked this in my calendar, and made sure that I'd be able to get there on time.

Unfortunately, I didn't get much sleep the night before, and I awakened with a desperate need for coffee to stay awake.  Even though I left the house a little later than expected, stopping at a Mickey D's for lunch, I was able to get to MWL's on time.  So we moseyed over to the theater and I took a few photos of the place.

The Lafayette theater in Suffern is a classic, and I hope its phased in reopening works as planned.  So far, they are showing only old films on weekends, probably making merely enough money to rent the film (there were 40-50 people in the audience) and show it to a paying audience.  ($6/pp doesn't go very far, save when showing OLD films.)  Sooner or later, they will have to bite the bullet and show modern films, or find a sponsor to keep this theater alive. I hope they can do so without ruining the atmosphere of the place.

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There's not much to say about the rest of the day.  More tomorrow....