I'm gonna sit right down and write myself an entry....

 

Well, most of my friends know I enjoy much of the music from the 1930's thru the 1970's.  Disco left me wanting for music which had more than just a danceable beat.  The 1930's & 1940's were the era of the big bands, and I'll always enjoy hearing the music of Benny Goodman, Glenn Miller, Count Basie and others popular way back when.  The 1950's brought us Chuck Berry, Little Richard, Elvis and others.  And then Beatlemania hit in the 1960's with the British Invasion.  By the time the 1970's came around, I had started listening to Country music, and developed a taste for Hank Williams, Patsy Cline, Loretta Lynn, Waylon Jennings, Willie Nelson and others.  RQS has noted that most of the people who made the music I enjoy are dead.  And yet, due to the recording technology of the 20th century, their performances will always live on.

Lately, I've been listening to pop standards made popular by Sinatra, Dean Martin, Tony Bennett and others.  There is something about the lyrics of these classic performances that makes much of today's music sound like crap.  Yes, the Beatles and the Stones helped move music away from just being "Silly Love Songs" and brought pop lyrics into a more serious vein. 

Today's music leaves much to be desired.  Gone are the days where Cole Porter could write about a certain Miss Otis killing the love of her life and apologizing to her friend because her execution would interfere with their lunch date.  Even the Beatles' Maxwell's Silver Hammer had fun with a serial murderer.  The lyrics of today will talk about murder, but without any subtlety.  I miss the subtlety of old music and lyrics.

There are many musicians I wish I could have seen in person.  I once had the opportunity to listen to Paul McCartney in person, and skipped out on it for an Off Broadway play.  I have seen Paul Simon, Ella Fitzgerald, Elton John and others in person.  But there is no way I will spend my money on overpriced NYC tickets, given how much coin is being demanded for these tickets.  (There is no way I will spend $500+ to see the Stones at MSG!) Given how old that many of my favorite surviving performers/groups are, I would rather spend my money to lesser known musicians and some up and coming musicians who make music that I can enjoy at an affordable price.

Goosebumps and the Subway

This past weekend, RQS and I rode the subway more than usual.  First, we found remnants of a subway station entrance that is still used for location shoots.  And then, we caught a film crew packing up for the day.  

But first....

On Saturday, RQS and I went to the Nom Wah Tea Parlor (Nolita) to feast on some Dim Sum.  It was been a long time since we were there, and we didn't want to risk not being able to get served at their Chinatown location.  While there, we saw some subway times reminiscent of the subway station we just exited:

When I asked the fellow behind the counter whether the store's dining area included part of a subway entrance, he confirmed my suspicions and told me that the site was still used for an occasional film shoot.  (The staircase in the last picture above would have led into Nom Wah's dining area, on the other side of the Bowery from where the current entrance/exit is..)

But this was not all of our subway stories for the weekend.

Earlier on the weekend, NYC DOT (Dept. of Transportation) posted quite a few "No Parking" signs through RQS's area of Queens.  The parking restrictions were there to facilitate Goosebumps' film crew in getting their equipment and people to the site.  Given that I am very familiar with film crews, having worked near a studio in Lower Manhattan which always had film support vehicles and trailers on the block, I was still very surprised to find how many parking spaces that Goosebumps needed.

I made the "command decision" for the two of us to pass by where they were filing today's action.  And we saw the crew shutting down production for the day/  What I found most interesting was the renaming of the station above the staircase to the station master's kiosk.  (Look for Avenue X, with an orange circle with a white F route ID on it.)  We didn't know we were in South Brooklyn! 😇

Seeing everything made me very glad that I didn't bring my new car into the city this weekend.  At best, I'd have to leave RQS on Sunday afternoon.  At worst, my car would have been towed (and damaged) because I didn't leave before the tow trucks arrived.  Either way, I got the chance to see how much it takes to do a location shoot in NYC.

This is one time I'm NOT a tourist in NYC!

1960's Music

 

New York City is filled with many old buildings, many of them over 150 years old.  The above building has to have changed hands many times, so the 1873 and 1906 markers above the windows no longer have much meaning in today's world.  Was the company who built this building founded in 1873, and moved to this building in 1906?  So much history in this city has been torn down, paved over, or altered beyond recognition.  

This weekend, RQS and I went to see an off-Broadway play called "A Sign of the Times."  It's plot (or what little you can call a plot) is there to tie 1960's era songs together to tell a little tale of a small town girl who comes to NYC in the 1960's and finds the world much different than she expected.  As much as I love 1960's music, I'm not sure of what to make of this play.  RQS enjoyed the music very much.  But I was underwhelmed about how the songs were assembled.  Although I loved the songs and enjoyed the performers singing these songs, I felt that many of them were flat - because of how the people who orchestrated this piece of fluff changed the feel of some of these songs.

Would I recommend seeing this play when in NYC?  Yes.  Like the outside of the above building, the music from the Brill Building keeps getting reworked for better and worse.  All the casual listener of 1960's music will remember may be the original performances and maybe occasional covers of these songs.  But these were great songs, with only one clinker (in my humble opinion) in the bunch.  And I'm glad that someone has put them together for a new audience....

I'm still having minor issues with the new car

 

Yes.  When one buys a new car, one has something akin to teething pains when one is learning about the quirks of the car.  And I am learning quick!

Yesterday, my car wasn't recognizing voice commands when I wanted to make a call to one of my friends. A call to the salesman gave me an idea of how to resolve this problem.  Now, I have lost some of the features of Android Auto and of Subaru's Starlink for another unknown reason.  I figure that I'll send another message to the salesman - only to let him know that what he suggested worked, and that I have another problem that I'm working on.  (No, I'm not asking him for help on this one.  But I figure that he will be able to help someone else with my Android phone issues using the info I give him, as his main phone experience is with iPhones.)

- - - - - -

In a previous post, I commented on the "secret" sharing of driver data between Auto Manufacturers, Lexis/Nexis, and Insurance Companies.  This practice disgusts me, and I might have called off my car purchase if I had known this before writing a check for the down payment on my new car.  Today, one of the worst offenders, General Motors, has announced that it will cease sharing this information with data brokers.  Hopefully, other automobile manufacturers will follow GM's lead and stop their data sharing as well.

As I'm writing this entry, I'm watching a video regarding the Infotainment Screen and its use on my new car.  I figure that this is a video I should save, as it's easier to watch this video than to read a 500+ page user manual.  Hopefully, I'll learn enough about my new car, that I can drive it like I had years of experience beforehand, instead of feeling like an idiot at the controls.

Emptying out my old car is a pain!

 

I never knew how much stuff I had stashed in my Honda Civic until I started emptying it out.  Not only did I find out that the Civic had more room in its trunk than the Crosstrek has in its storage area, but I am also finding a lot of stuff in the nooks and crannies of the passenger compartment that I have to find homes for.

My first pass at cleaning out the old car resulted in me putting a large storage container into my apartment's downstairs storage compartment.  Then, I realized that things such as my phone charger were left in the old car.  So, I transferred them to the new car the next day.  Of course, there was even more stuff to transfer, such as my "coin can" (container for spare change) and my "Club" (steering wheel lock).  And still, I have to get around to cleaning stuff out from under the seats and then doing a factory reset on the old car to clear out my Bluetooth/phone settings.

Luckily, DCD won't be able to take possession of the car for at least another week or so.  This means that I still have a little time to clean out the car and get it ready for him.

I screwed something up!

 

One of the phrases I learned from my days as a computer programmer is: RTFM.  This phrase, RTFM, is described in polite terms as: "Read the Fine Manual".  Since most of us programmers were fluent in multiple programming languages, at least one spoken language and profanity, we usually substituted a better word for "Fine".  Last night, I had one of these situations where the manual would have stumped me if I had read it.

When I bought my first car, the owners manual was less than 100 pages long.  Most of the controls were self evident, the stalk on the left of the steering shaft controlled the lights (some cars had headlight controls elsewhere), the stalk on the right of the steering wheel controlled the wipers, and the gearbox lever was usually on the floor between the driver and passenger.  Even without an owners manual, the average person could operate the vehicle in complete confidence that s/he wouldn't screw up anything important.

The Subaru Crosstrek is much different than my Datsun B-210 and my Honda Civic.  Not only does the owners manual check in at over 500 pages, but the quick start guide of roughly 160 pages needs a shortcut guide of its own.  Needless to say, things can get screwed up very quickly.  For example, one has to turn off the collision avoidance system in order to take the car into a car wash.  I have yet to figure out how to use the car's adaptive cruise control feature along with the lane centering feature to allow the car to perform limited self driving.  But most of all, the device pairing process between the car and one's phone may just be the most annoying of all differences between this car and my old Civic.

Connecting Bluetooth devices is usually a simple task, and in both my Civic and the Crosstrek it is.  However, I had to program in my speed dial numbers and associated voiced names (such as "RQS Mobile") each time I connected a new phone to the Civic.  The Crosstrek ingests everything it can from the cell phone, and then allows the driver to hit a button and use voice commands to work much of the electronics in the car.  Yet, I screwed something up that was working when I took possession of the car.

The day I took possession of my car, the salesman set up the connection between my phone and the car.  All I had to do was hit the voice control button and say "Call RQS" and the car would make the phone call for me.  However, my phone would continue to display a message "Repair with device to enable advanced message access feature."  So I did this, and lost the ability to use voice commands to dial phone numbers.  AARGH!  Given that a salesman wants to keep his customers happy, I sent him an email and hope he responds quickly with a solution.  Fingers crossed!

The new car is finally mine!

 

Today, I felt like the day had more than 24 hours.  Not only did the night before allowed me just 4-5 hours of sleep.  But I felt like I needed to go back to bed for most of the day.

- - - - - -

The day started by me waking up early, and trying to go back to sleep without luck.  Given that I had a doctor's appointment at 10 am, I knew that it was going to be a long day for me.  So, I got showered and dressed as Mario, and off to town to see the doctor.  When I arrived, I found the place unusually empty, as if the doctor had come to the office for only a handful of patients.  

Lately, the doctor has had quite a few student interns from various medical programs assist him in his office.  Today, he had a new person, a young woman training to become a nurse practitioner.  And she introduced a different routine for the day, asking me a lot of questions that she could answer from looking at the doctor's records.  (She has to learn how to ask questions, as well as what questions to ask.  So I am not complaining.)  Then, the doctor came in, and asked his questions - and looked to put me on a new drug.  AARGH!  At least, I have renewed the supply of my old drugs, so the new prescription will have to wait.

Once done with the doctor, I returned home and prepared to remove the license plates from the old car, so that they could be placed on the new car.  Only one problem - I couldn't unscrew the fasteners holding the plates to the car, and I was in luck - my co-op's superintendent had just pulled into a vacant spot, and he was able to remove the plates with a little bit of effort.

- - - - - -

My next stop for the day was the car dealership.  Vicki came by around 1:30 pm, and off we went to complete the deal on the new car.  When I arrived, the salesman made sure to take a lot of pictures of me in front of my new car, and then started the process of showing me around the dealership before depositing me with the sales manager who sold me a couple of add-ons.  $1750 later, I was out the door, and the salesman showed me around the car, so that I could get the car home safely.  By then, Vicki was leaving, so I had the salesman to himself.  (Vicki noted that the fellow who sold her the car she was driving didn't take the time to make sure she knew the features on her car.  It's no wonder that he's now working at a used car dealership....)

When done with the salesman, I drove home to rest for a while.  And then, I got into a conversation with one of my neighbors.  It could lasted quite a bit longer, save for the fact that I looked at my watch and saw that I had to open the co-op's zoom meeting in 20 minutes.  So I rushed inside, and took care of co-op business for the next 2 hours.

- - - - - -

After the meeting ended, I was feeling exhausted.  But I figured that I'd make a run to BJ's as an excuse to see how well the car's automatic lights worked.  (There are a few things I have to be aware of with this setting, but I'll get used to it in time.)  What really gets to me is that I have to learn a whole new way to deal with the car's infotainment system and with its driver safety systems.  And this will also take some time.  (I just have to remember to turn the collision avoidance system off before going into a car wash, as the brakes will mistakenly hold the car in place to protect the car and what's in front of it....)

I think it's going to take a while to learn the ins and outs about the car, and I'd better be careful while doing so.

An evening with DCD

 

DCD is a strange person.  He doesn't always learn from his past, and he makes the same type of mistakes over and over again.  Tonight was a typical example of dealing with him....

- - - - - -

I met DCD at a New Rochelle diner a little after he completed work for the day.  When he arrived, he started to tell me what was going on in his life, and I mentioned that his present situation with his girlfriend is similar to where I was with Ex-GF-M over 10 years ago.  His girlfriend is addicted to tobacco and alcohol, and wants DCD to participate in the addiction triangle: Person A, Person B, and the Addiction.  Whether or not Person B is addicted or not, Person B's behavior will either be that of participating in an addiction, or trying to deal with Person A's addiction.  DCD is the latter type.

I'm not saying that DCD has his act together.  He doesn't pay attention to advice given to him by well meaning friends, nor does he car about things such as payment instructions.  We chatted a little about Zelle and I mentioned that I don't use it because it has become a hacker's paradise.  Once a hacker is able to get into your account via Zelle fraud, the banks have a nasty habit of saying that your money is lost forever.  Yet, when we finished our meal, DCD didn't ask me how I wanted to get paid - he sent me money via Zelle!  This pissed me off!!!!  I planned to take the advice given by Clark Howard (Clark.com), and avoid the use of Zelle to protect myself from scams.  And now, I had to use it to receive money from DCD!  AARGH!!!!!  (No wonder why his relationships fail - he doesn't pay attention to any important messages from anyone.)  Luckily, I don't have any banking apps on my phone, and avoid them like the plague.  I prefer to use my PC or Chromebook for financial transactions, and was able to use one of my lesser bank relationships to receive DCD's money.

When I asked DCD why he uses Zelle, he mentioned that he doesn't like "float".  What he did wasn't related to float.  Instead, it was related to his record keeping - he doesn't want to worry about whether a check has cleared or not - if he does a small value payment via Zelle, the money has left his account and his account inquiry always shows a current balance.  (One the way home, I mentioned this to RQS, and she said that DCD will continue doing things his own way, and not care about what others say to him in regard to their interactions with him.)

I'll end up seeing DCD again on Friday, if only to hand him paperwork for the car.  Hopefully, he won't screw things up, as I want the car out of my driveway within the next 2 1/2 weeks.

Closing out a weekend.

 

I accidentally deleted my original post for today.  So here goes....

Saturday was a rainy day where RQS and I would rather have stayed home.  However, I had taxes to take care of, and I had to take them to my new preparer.  Several traffic jams and delays caused by bad drivers losing control of their cars, we made it to my new preparer and were ready to make our trip to Suffern, NY to see the new Ghostbusters film.  

Why Suffern? you may ask.  There were closer theaters which involved much less driving.  Well, Saturday night's showing was accompanied by a Wurlitzer Organ being played prior to the 7:30 showing.  With the rain and road floods, we barely got to Suffern in time to get a bite to eat and enjoy the organ performance.

Too bad that we didn't stop somewhere other than the pizza parlor near the theater.  I won't name the place, as the food was mediocre at best.  But if you are in Suffern, skip the pizza and go for Mexican. At least we were able to get to the theater early enough to hear the whole organ performance. Was the film good?  For a franchise flick, it was pleasant.  But was it good?  It was an enjoyable way to spend an hour and a half on a Saturday evening. When we returned to the car, I found that a slow leak was detected by the TPMS system.  So I drove home, and made plans to go to Mavis Tires the next morning.  

Sunday came, and I went to Mavis.  90 minutes later, the tire was fixed, and I was home for the rest of the day to rest with RQS.  Unfortunately, Monday came, and RQS had to leave.  So we got some lunch, and I dropped her off at the station, so that she could get home during daytime hours....

By the time you read this....

 

By the time you read this, several things will have happened:

1. My taxes will be in the process of being prepared.
2. I will be in possession of my new car.
3. DCD will have started his process of getting the car registered in his own name.
4. I will have given RQS her birthday present.
5. My luggage will be opened, and packing will start for my California Cruise.

Of course, a lot of things will have happened in between then and now.  And you'll be able to read about them over the next few days.

- - - - - -

When I told my brother about my tax situation, I realized how much my brother wants to isolate my financial life from his.  I should mention that he wouldn't give me a recommendation for an accountant if I needed one this year, but would only help me file estimated taxes to buy a little time for me.  My guess is that if an acquaintance of his sees my returns, then they will have an idea of what a slice of my brother's life looks like.

Cleaning out my old car has helped me find things I had misplaced over the years.  One of these things was a canvas bag that I thought was in RQS's place.  Surprise!  It was in my car's trunk.  There was way too much stuff back there, and I'm glad that I am finally emptying it out.  (Guess what I'll be doing on Monday!)

Now that I have the information needed to get my new car on the road, I can give DCD the information he needs to start his process.  Hopefully, I'll have the old car out of my driveway soon.  If not, I know of at least one charity that takes donated cars.

Even though a bought theater tickets for RQS's birthday, I ordered a little something from Amazon for her to open up on the birthday itself.  Hopefully, she will like it.

And lastly, packing....   This will be a trip where I will spend one day as Mario and the rest as Marian. (I must visit my uncle while presenting as Mario.)  It's going to be nice to wear some warmer weather clothes for a change.  (I haven't worn a dress in California in ages, except while in transit to/from Hawaii.)  Since it will be Spring when I arrive, I have to bring sweaters (and a windbreaker) - especially for my time in San Francisco.  RQS's cousin knows I am trans, so it will be nice NOT to have to change into a pair of trousers when in San Diego....

The trouble with taxes

This morning, I didn't need my alarm clock to awaken me.  Yet, I know I'll be exhausted by both the end of the day and by the end of the weekend.  And all of this is because of taxes....

- - - - - -

As I've mentioned before, I have had to find a new tax preparer because my old one retired.  I thought I had been lucky to know someone in the Trans community who could do this work. But her health problems got in the way, and she had to bail on doing my taxes.  This left me with 3 weeks to get my taxes done and no one to do them.

The first thing I did was to make an emergency call to my former tax person, and I got the name of a new person.  This was the person who took over some of her old business, and is located in the old office space.  YAY!!!  Even better, this person is hungry and wants new business.  So, I'll end up picking RQS up at the station and driving down to my Trans friend to pick up my paperwork.  And then, I'll deliver this packet to my new tax person in Queens and hope for the best.

- - - - - -

This will be a half and half weekend for me.  At least, I'll be able to take RQS out to the movies and relax for a little while....

 

 

PS: We picked up the tax paperwork from my Trans friend on Friday, then delivered it to my new tax person on Saturday.  Although it rained like cats and dogs, I made it safely to Queens, where the new tax person is located.  And then, after an hour of waiting (we were in line to meet with this new lady), we had a pleasant conversation and a good idea of what the tax preparation would cost and when it would be done. It's a nice feeling to know that this headache is going away, and that I'll be able to focus on good things again.
 

I got a call today - my new car has arrived!

 

Now is the time, the Walrus said, to speak of many things.  Of shoes and ships and sealing wax, and whether pigs have wings....  Well, I probably have mangled a line from Lewis Carroll's "The Walrus and the Carpenter".  But I feel that I could write a short story about buying a car with the little nuisances I had to deal with in the process of doing so.  Yet, this is not the place for a long, drawn out story.

- - - - - -

So, what did I end up doing?

First, I drove to the bank to get a cashier's check to pay for the car.  Given that inflation has taken a lot of value from our currency, I still find it hard to believe that I paid more for this car than I put down as a down payment on my apartment.  And then I was worried a little that I didn't get the right kind of check from the bank.

Next, it was a call to my insurance company to find out what I need to do to get the insurance transferred to the new car.  I learned that things had changed, and that once the paperwork is started, the old car is covered for 24-48 hours.  This is good to know, as I will need to make sure that DCD can pick up the old car with his own plates.

Finally, I was able to contact the salesman to tell him that I'd be coming in on Tuesday to pick up the new car.  Of course, he wants me to speak to a final person who will try to sell me add-ons.  I know which ones I want and don't want, but I will deal with this on Tuesday.

- - - - - -

Now that my need to be out as Mario was over, I could rest a bit before going to a meetup as Marian.  It was nice to pretty myself up again, as I know that I'll soon be stuck in Mario mode for the better part of a week. But I wasn't sure that I wanted to go to the meetup, and I would have been better off by bailing out.  The activity was a music themed bingo at a local sports bar, and it was too loud there for me to enjoy myself.  If I didn't have a bite to eat while there, I could have gotten into playing bingo.  So, with this in mind, I took my leave a little early and drove home for the night

Lunch with RO - a short post

 

Today's post is going to be a short one, as I was very tired after a long drive and a big lunch with a friend who knows I am transgender and treats me as a woman.

- - - - - -

RO and I usually try to get together every 4-6 weeks or so.  Although we once dated, we are just friends - especially when the two of us are in stable, committed relationships.  So our conversations tend to be those where we catch up on events going on in each other's lives, and not sharing our troubles with someone who has a sympathetic ear.  Our lunch fit that pattern today.

Given that we live 2 1/2 hours away from each other, we have found a few places to eat in locations halfway between our homes.  Today's place was a Greek restaurant near Patterson, NJ at which RO has feasted before.  And this was a good choice, as the food was good.  It was also a mistake, as both of us spent twice as much as planned.  Luckily, I had cash on me, and room in the back to take my leftovers home.

Would I eat here again?   Yes!   But I'd be careful with my spending, as it is way too easy to get lost with appetizers, large platters, and desserts.

Some Disturbing News in the Times today

 

A recent New York Times article noted that many automakers are selling information on the driving habits of car owners to organizations such as LexisNexis Risk Solutions, where it is then resold to insurance companies. This is disgusting to say the least.  Most people owning late model cars weren't properly notified information about car owners' driving habits would be shared with outside companies.  In the case of GM cars, people were led to believe that data was being shared with Sirius/XM, so that they could subscribe to satellite radio services, and nothing more. As noted in the Privacy Not Included blog: SURPRISE!!!!!

As I am in the process of buying a new car, I have to be aware that my new car may be able to send this data to LexisNexis as well.  Supposedly, Subaru has an option to turn off the transmission to LexisNexis. I will ask the salesman about this before I sign the final paperwork on the car, as this will affect the options I select when using the new car.

- - - - - -

Why is this so important to me?

I don't care much if the government is able to locate me.  I do care if private industry is able to accumulate information about me without my permission.  Many Americans distrust government, but will surrender information to private industry at will.  It's bad enough that firms such as Amazon and Google have as much information about us as they do.  But, unlike government, there are no limits to what they can do with this information.

Given that the IRS knows how much we make, how much we pay in taxes, and how much we own (for the most part), I trust government more than I trust big business.  Big government drowns in the amount of information they have, and it is very constrained in how the data is used.  So, I consider big government the lesser of two evils.

Yes, there is always the possibility that personal information can be abused.  But it is easier for people to hold government accountable for the misuse of data than big business.  And we should remember that when we hear representatives of big business advocate for their positions.....

- - - - - -

How to Find Out What Your Car Is Doing

• See the data your car is capable of collecting with this tool: https://vehicleprivacyreport.com/.

• Check your connected car app, if you use one, to see if you are enrolled in one of these programs.

• Do an online search for “privacy request form” alongside the name of your vehicle’s manufacturer. There should be instructions on how to request information your car company has about you.

• Request your LexisNexis report: https://consumer.risk.lexisnexis.com/consumer

• Request your Verisk report: https://fcra.verisk.com/#/

Posting a Bond

 

By now, out 45th president will have gotten a surety bond to pay the civil penalty for misrepresenting the value of his assets, or New York's Attorney General will have started the process to collect over $400,000,000 from him.  March 25th will have been a very interesting news date to say the least.

- - - - - -

I have gotten to the point where I can only skim the news, as there is so much misinformation coming from #45 and the GOP.  Even my own congress critter (who I have no respect for, as he has broken his campaign promises) has had to echo the lies being spewed by the GOP.  The public is weary of this nonsense, but is powerless to stop it until Election Day.  If #45 (and the GOP) loses again, we will likely be rid of this threat to democracy.

But this doesn't mean we are out of harms way....

The MAGA movement will likely metastasize, and a similar cancer in the body politic will come near the levers of power.  Anyone in the LGBTIQ community will be at risk, as the GOP's ranks have been contaminated by Fundamentalist White Christian Nationalists.   They won't rest until we are back in the closet.  But I'm not interested in going back in the closet.  I enjoy life now.  Being able to interact with the world as Marian is much more rewarding than being closeted as Mario.

So, each time #45 suffers a setback, I will cheer.  The man is evil, and destroys everything he touches.  Let's hope that's brought to justice before Election Day....

I'm a little upset at someone who just can't wait....

 

The other day, I offered DCD a deal where he could buy my car for 2 years of affordable car payments.  I'm not in any hurry to give him information on my car needed for registration until I have the same information on my new car ready for my insurance agent.  Knowing DCD as I do, he's in a rush to get things done, and I know that he'll screw things up if I supply information ahead of time.

Recently, DCD started pestering me for this information, saying:

In my efforts to plan accordingly between insurance, DMV, and our logistics, I wanted to talk about a game plan since we are in the last two weeks of March.

- - - - - -

I understand your concerns. Keep in mind that I am not legal to drive your car until I register it. I do have old plates, but I am not supposed to use them.

I tried to make an appointment with DMV. I was not able to determine how far out they are with appointments.

Yes, I know that things should be OK.  However, I'm doing things on my time frame, not his.  By the time you see this post, I should be in my new car, and this will have been resolved.  I'll have transferred my plates and insurance to the new car, and DCD should have started the process of getting new plates and insurance for what will now be his car.

Keep your fingers crossed that my car will come in on time....

Being rudely awakened

 

This morning, I was enjoying a moment of relaxed semi-consciousness when my alarm went off to remind me to take my morning pills.  If that wasn't bad enough, my land line rang and a car salesman called to find out whether or not I was still interested in buying a new car. And then, my brother called to ask me what I thought of a house in Florida he was interested in buying to run as an AirBnb.   AARGH!

Of course, this wake-up call ruined my day.  Later on in the day, my brother called again.  Seems like he found a house that he'd like to rent out, and have me make a $100k investment with him.  He's thinking of renting the place out for a few years, and then use it as a retirement home. The last thing I want is to take this much of a risk with my money, especially when dealing with Florida real estate.  I don't know the region that well, and I don't trust the market in Port St. Lucie.  Ex-GF-M's parents used to live there, and they didn't see their house appreciate in value as much as they expected.  Even with the advent of Brightline high speed rail extending service to Orlando and Tampa, something tells me that this will not be a good bet for us.

Luckily, I remembered what George S. Moore said in his memoir, "A Banker's Life" - one should have at least 3 ways to get one's money out of a deal.  I mentioned this to my brother, and he only saw 2 ways to get his money out of this deal. So this slowed him down a bit.  I mentioned that Delaware property near the ocean might be a better bet, as it's a more mature market that would be easier to monitor while living in the New York City metropolitan area.

Hopefully, my brother won't rush into this deal.  I'm afraid that he might be in for a rude awakening if he goes through with it.  

Spring is coming and I am not!

 

With a title like that, you'd think that this non-op trans gal would want to be in an advertisement for ED drugs.  But you'd be wrong!  What I'm talking about here is our political landscape and the lies that were implied by the rebuttal to our president's State of the Union address.

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Now, I rarely listen to any political speeches, as they tend to be things to stir up a politician's base, that of his party, or both.  Nothing important is usually said, except when they are causes for alarm.  Even Trump's rants are not worth listening to, as nothing important is being said, save that he claims to be a victim of the "Deep State" and that he intends to get even if he is returned to power.  Yet, some people hang on every word.  

To me, she shorter the speech, the better.  Lincoln said a lot in a few words at Gettysburg.  It remains one of the most powerful speeches ever written in the English language.  Yet, it was so short, that photographers didn't have the time to set up their cameras to capture Lincoln while at the podium.  Does anyone remember much about Kennedy's speeches, other than the phrase "Ask not what your country can do for you..."?  What about Churchill's "Iron Curtain" speech?  If anything, we remember a catch phrase from these speeches, such as Reagan's "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall."  So, I didn't bother watching Biden's SOTU address, as nothing of note (other than its tone) might be worth noting.

However, I did get convinced to watch the GOP's rebuttal to Biden.   It was so bad, that I couldn't get through watching the whole thing, as it could be right out of an ad to become a handmaiden in "A Handmaiden's Tale."  Several comedic takes were made of this speech, including a version on Saturday Night Live.  In short, the rebuttal showed how the mainstream of the GOP wants to return America to the 1950's, where white women were kept at home, LGBTQ's were kept in the closet, and where Blacks, Latinos, and Asians were nowhere to be seen - except as "domestic" workers, farm hands, and Chinese laundries.

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If the GOP thinks that their rebuttal speech will cause more people to come to the GOP's way of thinking, they must be "nucking futs!"  They have shown how out of touch they are with the American public as a whole.  Yes, much of the GOP still lives in areas where it is 1955.  But even then, Jackie Robinson was leading Brooklyn's beloved Dodgers to their only World Series title earned in Brooklyn.

The world has changed, in most ways for the better.  I hope that we can get as many of our friends in swing states to vote our way - if only to protect the hard earned freedoms we now have.  The only return to the 1950's I want is on a functioning time machine, so that I can see the Dodgers win the Series, and to see Don Larson pitch his perfect game in the Series the next year.

Trans people are more varied than one might think.

 

When many people think of trans people, they think of predecessors such as Renee Richards and Christine Jorgensen.  Although these two trans women had severe gender dysphoria, we all share one characteristic: we all wish we were born into the other gender.  But that's the one thing that bonds us together, as many of us deal with this condition differently.

Many trans women take a path that involves exploring their sexuality, their gender presentation, and finally, body modification to make their bodies look as much like the image of themselves they want to be.  But this is still a simplification.  For many, gender preference is locked in at an early age, and only gets loosened up a bit when a trans person is exposed to the hormones of their identified gender.  One trans woman I know enjoys the idea of "adult play" with both sexes.  And yet, she has not been able to explore much after Gender Corrective Surgery (GCS or "the operation").  About the only thing she misses about life as a male is the ability to "go" standing up. 

Being "Out" as a trans person often prevents a person from finding romance.  For every trans person who finds romance, there may be up to 100 who are forced to give up on romance.  One of the reasons an ex-girlfriend broke up with me was that I am transgender.  It seems like most relationships break up because a transgender person comes "out".  This may be related to a subconscious fear that a partner's sexuality will contaminate the sexual identity of the other.  (Am I a lesbian if my male partner comes out as trans?)  Yet, there are many trans folk who go back and forth between male and female worlds with their partners' acceptance - including myself.

Not all trans folk need GCS.  For example the porn star,. Buck Angel, hasn't felt a need to modify his body to have genitalia resembling that of a cisgender male.  As such, he has a unique category in the world of porn.  Some of my trans acquaintances have had GCS, and others have not.  Most are happy with their decisions regarding the surgery, as those with mild gender dysphoria are happy not having to go through a painful surgery and not having to dilate themselves several times each day.

You'll notice that I haven't yet mentioned social class, political affiliation, education level and sports.  Most trans folk remain interested in the same pastimes they enjoyed before coming out. identify as belonging to the same social class (not necessarily economic class), retain the same political affiliation (yes, it's strange to see GOP trans people staying loyal to the party when it is anti-trans), come from all levels of education and enjoy both "male" and "female" social interests.

Being trans may seem strange to many, but it is just as strange to us at times....

Sometimes, dealing with friends can be frustrating

 

Part of the process of buying a new car includes disposing of the old car.  In my case, I have a targeted recipient for the new car - DCD.  He has a fair deal waiting for him as long as he doesn't blow it.  How often can someone get a well maintained car for under $2,500?  (What I'm not telling him is that if anything major goes wrong with the car, I'll forgive the remaining balance on the loan I'm floating for him. It's an effective $100/month car rent to own deal.)

Late last night, DCD started asking me for information on the car (VIN number, etc.) as if he was going to register and insure the car tomorrow.  This is frustrating.  It's not as if he is going to get the car on a fixed schedule - I have to get the same information from my new car's dealership so that my insurance agent can do his magic. And I don't expect that information for a week or two yet.

I figure that this is a small price to pay to get rid of an old car to get a new one in my driveway.  Yet, DCD adds a bit to my frustration because he is over eager to get this car in his driveway.  He is known for doing stupid things such as seeing the engine light come on due to overheating, and driving his car until the engine seized. Then, he had another car which got totaled, and he had to pay off the other driver to keep his mom's insurance from being dinged.  So, I have my doubts that he will be able to keep this car on the road for the 2 years I expect that this car could last if well maintained.

In reality, I'm treating this "sale" as if I am giving him my car.  I owed him a favor, and this is my way of returning it.  He's getting a car at a very affordable price, with a hidden, unspoken warranty that the car will last two years if properly maintained.  Hopefully, he will be able to keep this car on the road for the next two years.