Trekking into NYC and taking care of paperwork

 

I had one thing that I had to take care of today, and I can blame part of my failure to do so on my brother. Yet, today's focus is not on a minor screw up, but on visiting the neighborhood in which I used to work.

- - - - - - 

The plan for today was to trek into NYC to get an official copy of both my birth certificate and that of my deceased father.  I'd have no problem getting my own birth certificate.  But to get my dad's birth certificate, I would need an official copy of my dad's death certificate - which my brother was supposed to mail to me, but didn't.

So, around 11 am, I drove to Croton-Harmon railroad station, stopping first at a local deli. Instead of taking 5 minutes to get my usual sausage and egg sandwich, it took 15.  So I arrived at the train station with barely enough time to make the 11:48 train.  And when I say barely, I mean just that.  I was in the elevator with 3 minutes to go, and had just purchased my train ticket as the train came into the station.  Luckily, I was able to make it down the stairs and onto the train without rushing, as I'd have to wait another 30+ minutes for the next train.

Arriving at Grand Central, I noticed hot hot and humid it felt.  (I was glad that I had chosen to travel as Mario, as wearing a wig would have been too much to deal with today.)  30 minutes later, I was downtown and in front of NYC's bureau of vital records.  (I wish I had kept in the habit of walking at least 2 miles each day, as my legs were bothering me for the first mile I walked.) After checking to make sure I was at the right building, I killed time at the Starbucks across the street.

Once inside, it was bureaucracy in action.  First, one takes a number.  Next, one enters ALL the information needed to purchase a vital record, in my case a birth certificate. And then, you wait for your number to be called and to pay for your service.  While entering my data, I was told that my dad's birth certificate had to be ordered by mail AND that I needed my dad's death certificate.  AARGH!  I could have stayed comfortable and done everything by mail had my brother sent me the death certificate as promised.

- - - - - -

Once done with the bureau of vital records, I walked over to where I used to work (a much longer walk than I remembered) to get lunch at the Halal cart I used to regularly patronize.  Although there were 2 carts there now, I picked one that best resembled what I remembered from 10 years ago and ordered my old everyday order - a chicken and lamb combo with lots of white sauce and a touch of hot sauce.  But I now had a problem. Where could I sit down and eat?  So I decided to walk a couple of blocks and find a place to sit.  The only place I found with open seats was inside a playground for dogs.  This was perfect, as I had free entertainment provided by the dogs and their owner while I enjoyed my meal.

Soon, I was on my way back home, and I was back in my car around 5 pm.  Once at home, I fell asleep for an hour or so and then was ready to take care of some chores before calling it a day.  At least, I likely won't need to trek into NYC again for paperwork purposes anytime soon.

Did I do Laundry? No! But I did go shopping.

 

There's an old saying that goes: "Only Mad Dogs and Englishmen go out in the midday sun."  Given how hot it was today, it made sense for me to stay inside for most of the day, only bothering to go outside to do some shopping at Walmart and to pick up some things at CVS.  

- - - - - -

Today's shopping list included a motley assortment of items:

• New Sneakers to replace ones that are wearing out
• Makeup, specifically Eyebrow Liner and Setting Powder
  
• Gift bag to hold a photo album that I'm giving to my neighbors for their wedding.
  (They don't expect anything from me, but they are a nice young couple who I like a lot.)

My first stop was at Walmart, so that I could buy the sneakers.  In theory, I could have bought everything here.  However, I was in a rush to get the sneakers, then go for some dinner before an 8 pm zoom meeting with my Texas friends. While at Walmart, I encountered my friendly transgender checkout clerk.  When she asked me why I wasn't on her line, I noted that I didn't want to cut in front of the person next on line.  Then that person let me in, so I could chat for a minute with my friend.

Soon afterwards, I was on my way to dinner, and then to CVS.  Did I pick up the gift bag while picking up makeup?  No.  That would have to wait until after the Zoom meeting.  So I opened the zoom meeting, and it didn't last as long as usual.  (RQS and I would chat about this later on.  But I won't go into details here.)  I still had to go back to CVS to pick up the gift bag, and I could have our nightly chat while I was driving.

I found the gift bag I wanted at CVS, and took a long drive around Northern Westchester while chatting with RQS.  Instead of taking the usual routes that I would drive, I made sure not to hit the usual cell phone dead spots - this had me doubling back along the route I drove to Tarrytown.  Once home, I finished up some paperwork I needed before going to NYC to request long form birth certificates for myself and my late father.  (Hopefully, I won't have any problems with this request, as I need to file both my father's and my birth certificates as part of the chain of ancestry I need to prove on some government paperwork I have to start filing soon. And then, I started to do the brain exercises required by the study I'm participating in.  Were they fun?  Yes, only because they are presented as a game.  However, this could get boring quickly.

- - - - - - 

So, am I a mad dog or an Englishman?  Probably not, as I avoided going outside in the worst of the heat.  But I did end up going outside after all....
 

Do I talk about the fMRI, or do I talk about the brain function test?

 

OK, I must start by informing my readers that both things had to do with the scientific study I am participating in.  Neither was much effort, but both took valuable time out of my life for which I will be compensated.

- - - - - -

My day started with getting dressed as Mario.  There was no way I was going to go to the fMRI place in Laurelton, Queens with more clothing than I needed to wear.  Shaving closer than usual (something I wish I didn't need to do for presenting as Marian), I proceeded to get ready to cross the East River and make it to the MRI center by 2:30 pm.  Although I was in the area around 2:00 pm, I killed time, so that I could arrive at 2:30 sharp.

I had to wait a few minutes and fill in some forms before being directed to the MRI area to strip and get ready for the procedure.  When I put my clothes in the locker, I found that the locker door was off one of its hinges, and that I couldn't fully secure my property.  This didn't worry me too much, as access to this area of the property was controlled - no one would be likely to sneak in and steal my property.  

But I digress....

At 3:00 pm, I was brought to the MRI machine, and my head was placed in a position where it couldn't move.  Then, the "fun" began.  I was given headphones to deaden the noise from outside, a mask was put over my head to lock it into place, and then I was slid into the machine.  A cacophony of noise assaulted my ears even with the headset on, and then I developed an itch I couldn't scratch for 15 minutes.  

When the 15 minutes and noise ended, I slid out of the device and proceeded to get dressed to return home.  (I'm not going to like my next visit here at the end of the study.)  Traffic flowed, but slowed down a little the closer I got to rush hour.  Before I got home, I stopped in Pleasantville to get some lobster from the lobster truck, then continued home for the evening.

- - - - - -

The next thing on my docket was the webinar/base line assessment which gave the researchers an idea of what my performance levels were when the study started.  So, at 8:00 pm, I logged onto the webinar and spent the next hour filling in several questionnaires and playing "games" to determine my level of performance on each of several sets of tasks for their baseline.  (I'd love to know what each of these tasks were supposed to test.)  I'd describe each of these "games" as a version of the games "Simon" and "Bop It".  They started out easy, but got more challenging as short term memory and spatial recognition were exercised in these tasks.

I was off line by 9:00 pm, and am now awaiting further instructions.  Soon, the "fun" will begin.

 

 

PS: It took me about 30 minutes to get the studs back in my earlobes.  Overnight, one hole may have closed, and I may have forced it open without pain.  But the stud will need to stay in place for another couple of months....

Where does a non-op trans person go to the loo?

 

Although this may be a short post, it poses a dilemma that can cause us problems if in the wrong place at the wrong time - Where can a non-op trans person go to the loo while traveling across the United States?

When I first started going out as Marian, I worried what people would think when I went to the women's room to relieve myself. In New York, I didn't feel that I had to worry much - even though I may not have looked as much as a woman than a man in a dress.  But I had serious concerns.  Over time, both my feminine presentation skills and my confidence in going out as Marian developed quite a bit.  Most of the time now, I think people see me as an oversized woman instead of a fat man in a dress.

I've traveled as Marian, having taken cruises to New England/Eastern Canada ports, to Eastern Caribbean ports (only getting off at St. Martin and St. Thomas), to ports along the California coast, and to Hawaii. In addition, I've traveled to Washington, DC and Chicago, Il as Marian.  But I know that I have to be careful where I travel, given laws that affect transgender people.  For example, GOP states have enacted laws that limit where transgender people can relieve themselves.  I was surprised to find that Texas (with its laws that prohibit gender changes on legal documents) hasn't yet (as far as this map shows) been enacted a bathroom bill.  (Maybe I can find a way to visit my friends in Texas after all....)

Soon, RQS and I may schedule a last minute cruise to New England/Eastern Canada on the same ship that will take us to Bermuda.  This will only happen if a co-op meeting has to be postponed.  I'm hoping that we can take this cruise, as it will be nice to cruise again as Marian. 

 

PS: I can say that I committed a criminal act in one of the states I've visited by going to the loo.  It's nice to be a criminal!

The end of a weekend came with an oil change and tire rotation

 

Yesterday, RQS and I sat around the house relaxing until a little before dusk.  At that time, we went out so that she could practice her photography skills.  But this is not the focus of today's post.

- - - - - -

Today was the first day that I had to wear male clothes in a while.  In fact, I can't remember the last time I had to present myself as Mario.  And it felt strange to get dressed in trousers and a shirt, instead of a casual dress with a sweater nearby to keep me comfortable.  Yet, I'll be doing so for the better part of the work week, as I've scheduled 3 days worth of appearances for Mario:

• Monday: Get 6,000 mile car service (oil change and tire rotation)|
• Tuesday: Get fMRI for scientific study I'm participating in.
• Thursday: In-person appointment at NYC's Department of Vital Records or Department of Health  to get birth certificates  (for myself and my dad, each with an apostille for international use)

Although I might want to visit NYC's offices as Marian, it might be easier for me to present myself as being consistent with my legal identification.  Even if I were to dress as Marian on Wednesday, I will still a bit strange if I were to have dinner with RQS on Thursday as Mario.  

- - - - - -

Last night, I transferred my money and my ID into my male wallet in preparation to use it today.  When RQS and I got dressed to leave the house, I almost forgot it on my desk - I've gotten so used to going out as Marian with my handbag, that thinking about putting my wallet in my trousers wasn't an automatic part of getting dressed for me.

After dropping RQS off at the station, I relaxed for a little while before taking my car to the dealership for its 6,000 mile service.  Although I got there a little early, it took longer than expected before I got my car back.  And since I was in the area, I decided to stop at BJ's for a little (and I mean little) retail therapy.  By the time I left, I had tonight's dinner and some chicken pot pies I could eat over the next 2 weeks.

Tomorrow, I'll be driving to Queens to take care of the fMRI.  Sadly, I'll have to take the studs out of my earlobes for this scan, and I know I'll have a hard time putting them back in again.
 

Oysters with RQS

 

While at dinner in NYC, RQS and I discussed dinner plans for the weekend.  I suggested picking up Lobster at Shoprite, while RQS was thinking of Oysters at Whole Foods.  Guess what we chose - Oysters on Friday night and Lobsters on Saturday.  Yum!  (Just don't tell my doctor about this.)  Seafood would be the theme for the weekend, and all I might want to do was find some clam chowder or lobster bisque to make things perfect.

- - - - - -

I didn't get a good night's sleep before, and I woke up early on Friday morning having forgotten about our dinner choices for the weekend.  So, when RQS mentioned that she'd be coming up around 2:30 pm, I realized that I had to rush to get ready.  Like a typical woman, my dilemma was what to wear.  So I picked out a coral version of the navy blue dress I wore the night before and got ready to pick RQS up at the station.

Croton-Harmon station is undergoing major renovation.  The town is installing solar panels over the entire parking lot (at least, over the areas not prone to flooding) as a way of generating new revenue for the town.  This has caused major sections of the parking lot to be taken off line while the solar panels are installed above the parking areas.  (It'll be nice for many to be able to park in areas protected from inclement weather.  Sadly, this only helps those with preferred parking space permits.)  This week, construction took out the parking area that the local taxis normally use and this created a mess around the area where passengers usually depart the station and get to their rides home.  The taxi stands have been relocated to the far end of the station, people have to walk further to reach parked cars, and the pick-up area is much more congested than normal.  This made it hard for RQS to find me, so I had to call her to tell her where to find me.

Once in the car, we ended up going to Whole Foods for oysters.  Arriving at 3:00 (or so), the first thing we did was to order 3 dozen oysters and have them shucked for us.  30 minutes later, we were feasting on our trays in the store.  It's nice to be able to get oysters at $1 each on Fridays, as something expensive becomes an affordable treat.  Both of us found that 18 oysters each was a perfect midday meal to start a summer's weekend.

After finishing our meal, it was time to go home and relax.  Although we went out later for a ride, the oysters were the high point of the day....

Another NYC Restaurant Week Dinner with RQS

RQS mentioned that a restaurant in the Flatiron district had extended its restaurant week offerings, so that they end on the last day of the month.  Although this place (Sagaponack) had a $1/Oyster special for happy hour on Fridays, I suggested that we take advantage of the $45/pp Prix Fixe restaurant week offering on a Thursday.  This would be the second week in a row that I'd take the train into NYC to have a nice dinner.  But this week, I didn't feel bloated after dinner.

The restaurant week menu at Sagaponack isn't much different than its usual menu.  However, with Gambas de Ajillo (Shrimp cooled in a garlic and pimento sauce), Wagyu beef burgers and Peekytoe Crab Rolls on the menu, we just had to try the place out.  Although most of the diners simply dropped in for a table, we had made reservations for 7:30 pm.  Upon entering the place, RQS noticed that there were almost no males in the place.  (This would not be the case for long.)  And we were shown our way to the back to enjoy our meal.

Service was good, albeit a tad slow.  But we weren't rushed either.  Both of us ordered the shrimp for an appetizer, while RQS ordered the crab roll for a main course and I ordered the Burger.  If I say the shrimp were the best part of the meal, it's not because the other offerings weren't top notch.  It's because the shrimp had a wonderful flavor well above and beyond what we had a right to expect for an appetizer. Next came our main courses.  If I knew how good the crab roll would taste, I would have ordered that instead of the Wagyu beef burger.  Yet, the burger was cooked to perfection.  Dessert was either of two varieties of Panna Cotta.  It was a wonderful way to end a good meal.  We will certainly go to this place again.

RQS and I walked to Union Square holding hands all the way.  It's nice for two women to be able to openly show public signs of affection in NYC.  I don't think I'd ever want to leave the NYC region if I didn't have to - it's one of the rare places that allow people to be themselves if they don't harm others.  It's much better than any place below the Mason-Dixon line these days.

All too soon, I was on my way home.  It was nice to finally strip and get comfortable.

Politics: Another term for many flesh eating insects.

 

Huey P. Long - Former Governor of Louisiana.

Huey Long was a one of a kind politician.  He was a populist dictator in many ways, and someone who pissed off many of the wrong people.  Although he championed the cause of the poor white man and believed in checking the power of the former elite who once ran his state's government, he amassed unchecked power in his own right and could only be stopped by a bullet from an assassin's gun.

Why is this important?

Long's family continued to dominate his state's politics long after his death, and represents the danger of vesting too much power in one person and in one person's family. Today, we have a choice between "Honest Politicians" (def: One who when bought, stays bought) and others who will abuse power once they have it and destroy our political system for their own gain.

Given that I am a member of the LGBTIQ community, I am very concerned about what will happen if Trump gets elected.  How many people do you know that can go bankrupt several times and be considered a successful politician by his cult members?  How many of my readers know that he made $300,000 by endorsing an edition of the bible - a book that he never has read and never will read.  Every decision he makes is short term in nature, and is done to refresh his bank account or to indulge his desire for absolute power.  His alliance with hard line Christian Fundamentalists puts my life at risk, as I don't want to go back to living life as in the gender which I was assigned at birth.  Although I could go stealth, I don't trust that my privacy will be respected in any regime where he is the leader - I would not be safe if our community is hunted down as Jews were in Nazi Germany.

Sadly, many of the "Never Trump" Republicans have sold their souls to keep being elected and having their hands greased by people wanting favors.  They fear Trump's cult.  Even though many hate him, they are afraid of being voted out of power.  So, they mouth support for this evil man and make him stronger.  These people have as much use to me as a lone star tick, as I don't like what wither species can do to me.

Luckily, we have a good chance of keeping our former president far from the White House, now that Kamala Harris is the Democratic Presidential nominee.  The Democratic party is far from perfect - it wants to protect illegal aliens already in this country instead of shipping them back to their homelands. Yet, it does want to make sure that all asylum seekers get their day in court without having to wait for years due to an underfunded court system - a more humane way of dealing with part of the problem. We have a choice between humanity and inhumanity.  I'm choosing to err on the side of humanity.  How about you?

The older I get, the more I know when to get worried or not.

 

There is one big advantage to being young: The invincibility that one often feels propels us to take chances in life that older and wiser people might not take.  For example, when young, we often choose our mates on superficial characteristics.  For example: Is s/he good looking?  This question may have evolved as a way to determine the health characteristics of a person during the age that they are most fertile.  It also can reflect how high a status level a mate might have (especially in males), as both attractiveness and height can reflect both physical health and social position. 

But what questions should we ask as we get older?  What advantages do we have because we have successfully made it to old age?  This is where I feel that I have gotten better as I've gotten older.  Yes, my body is slowly breaking down as a normal part of aging.  But the memories and skills I've developed over those years have given me the insights to ask better questions when choosing a mate.

Lately, I've been thinking about how many big mistakes I've made in my life.  Some of these mistakes occurred because I didn't have enough knowledge to make wise decisions.  Others were made because I didn't have the skills to implement those wise decisions.  When I was young, I had low expectations - if the woman I dated accepted me and we didn't kill each other, then she was acceptable.  Can I say that I'd have married my late wife had I known what would happen in the future?  Maybe not.  But would she have chosen me had she known what would occur in our marriage?  Again, maybe not.  I could say similar things about other women I've dated.  But with RQS, both of us knew what we were getting early on in our relationship, and we have similar values with complimentary communication styles.  This makes having a healthy relationship possible, and we have yet to shout "Tastes Great!" or "Less Filling!" at each other..

Many men look for "a nurse and a purse" when they look for a woman in their senior years.  Women also look for the same, with emphasis on the purse due to inequality of wealth between the genders.  Neither of us wanted that.  We simply wanted companionship, with a little romance on the side.  RQS knew I was transgender from our second date, and I knew about her issues the day I met her.  We feel good when we're together, and I'm glad that she brings up issues for me to handle before they have the chance to fester and cause us problems.

I'm hoping that we'll be able to take advantage of the benefits of being old before the drawbacks cripple us and make it impossible for us to enjoy the rest of our lives.  After my mom died, my dad became less active over the years, and eventually not able to live on his own.  Neither RQS nor I want to have old age take away our abilities to live life without being in a care home.  The care home may be in our futures.  But until then, we will try to live as best we can.  (Albeit with me in dresses most of the time.)

- - - - - -

But what do I worry about?

Lately, I find myself worrying about the possibility that the United States will become a fundamentalist "Christian" autocracy led by a bombastic narcissistic grifter.  It's bad enough that this person is a cult leader.  Unfortunately, we have seen the mess he made of this country in his 4 years in power.  Now, he has had 4 years to learn how to cement his control over the country, I'm afraid of what he will do to anyone who is not a white, straight, christian, cisgender male.  As it stands GOP loyalists have turned the clock back to 1973.  I'm afraid that it will turn the clock back to 1925.  

If we examine the events that occurred to end the "Roaring Twenties", American society changed from being an optimistic, outward looking people to a pessimistic, inward looking people within a few years.  What will happen if the GOP gets full control of the country again?  Will they screw things up as they did in the 1920's?  Will America become more like Nazi Germany than the USA under the New Deal?  Who knows?  But this is what I worry about at night....

 

I did virtually nothing, save walk 3/4 mile.

 

Buying 3 exercise dresses has motivated me to go outside and walk.  Yes, I wonder if people see this T-Gal as just a fat woman trying to stay mobile, or whether they see this T-Gal as a man in a dress.  Given that I'm comfortable going outside as a woman in outfits like the photo above, I do so - and no one seems to be batting an eyelash.

I've found that in order for my face to look more feminine, prop glasses (no corrective lenses) are a must.  If I didn't wear them, people would focus on the parts of my face where I don't want any focus.  (Could facial feminization surgery be in my future?  Only RQS will be able to answer that in a few years.)

Over time, I'd like to find an inexpensive yoga studio near me where I could go as Marian and no one batting an eyelash.  I've come close, but finding a studio has not been at the top of my priority list.  Yet, my goal is to get back to a size 20-22 within a couple of years.  To do that, it'll take diet, exercise and maybe a few shots of a GLP-1 agonist.

Today, I decided to take a walk at George's Island Park.  I've yet to find the official hiking paths there, but I have found a few vantage points from which one can enjoy views of the Hudson River.  It was a little cool for me to be wearing just this exercise dress.  Next time, if it is as cool as it was today, I will bring a jacket I bought from the active wear section of Lane Bryant.

After I left the park, I had a nice conversation with TCL.  And then I called my brother.  I needed to find out the exact spelling of the name my dad used on his passport, so that I can request a copy of his birth certificate.  New York City has to do a manual search on birth certificates which have not yet been digitized, as they are in the middle of indexing the entire physical database of vital records and the year of my dad's birth has not been indexed yet.  

Tomorrow, it will be dinner with a new meetup group.  Wish me luck!

Bye Bye to RQS and Hello to "Tall Vicki". (A short post.)

 

This past weekend RQS came up to Croton, and we had a relaxed time together.  But like all good things, the weekend had to end, and RQS had to return home.  As much as I am always a little sad when she leaves, it also is the opening for me to have some "Me Time" which I can use to recharge my emotional batteries and be ready for us getting together later in the week.

Around 3:00 pm, I drove to Croton-Harmon and kissed RQS goodbye for a few days.  Hopefully, she got home before the rain started.  This gave me some time to take care of some things, such as filling up the gas tank in my car and mending an article of clothing.  I figured that I could kill a couple of hours before getting dressed again and going out to have dinner with Vicki #1.

The skies opened up around 5:00 pm, with loud thunder passing through the area.  As soon as it came, it was gone. And I proceeded to the Sushi joint in town to meet Vicki. Vicki suggested a change of pace in our meal, where both of us would share a house special seafood soup for 2, a noodle dish with shrimp, and a mild maki roll.  I'd order the first 2 dishes, but go with a simpler roll with more flavor the next time we eat there. It was a short dinner.  And all too soon, we went home.  

It wasn't much of a day, but a relaxing one.

Seeing "Short Vicki" for dinner.

Most of my readers may know that I have two women friends named Vicki.  Vicki #1 ("Tall Vicki") is a woman I've known for almost 30 years, someone who has gone through her share of "Sturm und Drang" and come out OK.  Vicki #2 ("Short Vicki") is a woman I met while I was unattached, and we developed a good friendship over the years.  Hopefully, I'll be able to get both Vickies to meet each other, as I think they will enjoying knowing others with some similar interests.

But I digress....

Vicki #2 suggested that we get together over the weekend.  However, her plans changed, and RQS and I were able to meet her for dinner in Yonkers, after a brief stop at the book store to pick up some magazines that RQS is interested in.

It was nice to finally get RQS and Vicki together, as the only time they have met was when her husband passed away. (And, that's not what I call a real meeting.)  The three of us sat down for dinner and chatted for about an hour and a half before leaving.  Hopefully, next time Vicki and her wife will be able to join RQS and I for a dinner foursome.

Later on....

One of the people from game night has been trying to sell an inherited apartment which has both deed restrictions and other complications that make the owning/selling the apartment a dubious proposition. (I would have had similar problems had my father not seen a lawyer many years ago and not put the family homestead in my brother's name and my name at that time.)  We chatted via online messages, and I expect that our voice chat will be interesting.

As you can see, life can be interesting - even when nothing much is going on.

Seeing LK for lunch and encountering bad traffic

 

Getting together with LK is not the easiest thing to schedule.  With young children, her responsibilities as a mother come before everything else in life.  That means that if anything goes wrong with her or her children, we must reschedule things.  Our most recent meal was one of those rescheduled events.

LK was feeling under the weather on Wednesday, and said that she'd like to try for a Friday lunch if she was feeling better.  Around 7:00 am, she texted me to suggest lunch at a restaurant in New City, NY for 11:30 am/  Since it was already 10:00 am. I suggested a 12:30 pm time and that was OK with her.  So I rushed to shower, dress, and do my make up to meet her on the other side of the river.  Since this was the first time I'd get to meet her 2 children, I knew it would be a special meeting, albeit disrupted by the needs of her children.

I ran a little late, while LK was 15 minutes late.  So I knew that I'd have less time than usual to chat, as I had to pick up RQS at Croton-Harmon at 3:30 pm.  We chatted less than usual, as her son was grabbing all of her attention.  But that was OK.  I'm comfortable with having friends in all stages of life. LK was born to be a mom, and I was glad to see her in her in all of her maternal glory.  (I won't use that phrase around her, as she was feeling challenged by motherhood that day.)  Around  2:30 pm, I was on my way back to Croton, and mistakenly decided to cross the river at Bear Mountain.  This was a big mistake, as the road to Peekskill was backed up halfway to the bridge.  Eventually, I made it through the gauntlet, and made it to Croton-Harmon station in time to pick up RQS.

Pizza - An answer to what do we eat tonight? (a short post)

 '

How many of us have had this conversation:

"What's for dinner?"

"I don't know."

 

Well, this was the dilemma posed to RQS and I the other day.  Since I was not in the mood to cook, I was leaning toward pizza.  But where?  The only thing RQS remembered about the place we both liked was that the platter holding the cooked pizza was supported by a stand, so that there was more room on the table for dinner plates.  

Not being ready to eat around 6:00 pm, I decided to take a scenic drive around Northern Westchester county while thinking of inexpensive places to eat.  So we got in the car, and RQS decided to look for pizzerias which we've gone to and where she enjoyed the pizza.  And she found the one that I suggested we go to in the first place.  Now that we knew the place where RQS wanted to go, we decided to head there in the most direct way possible via side roads.

Once at the pizzeria, we knew it was the right place - and we feasted.  It was a nice way to kill some time and figure out what's for dinner.

I didn't do much today, save for grocery shopping and laundry.

 

I wasn't able to get to sleep last night.  So, all my plans for the day were fouled up before noon.  Originally, I was supposed to go out for an exercise walk while it was cool outside, contact an electrolysis operator for a consultation, contact my sleep doctor's office to find out when I should expect a call from the people setting up my sleep test, call the lab to set up the brain scan for a study I'll be participating in, and then get around to both laundry and food shopping.  It's not as much to do as it sounds.  But when one has no energy until mid afternoon, one can only do so much during daytime hours.

The first thing I took care of was to make the brain scan appointment.  It's a larger study than I might think, as it is being coordinated from a site in California.  Next, I tried to contact an electrolysis operator for a consultation, but both of the local operators were on vacation.  Finally, after getting showered, dressed and made up, I was out the door and off to Trader Joe's.  $35 later, I was returning home in time to get a load of laundry in before the soft deadline of 9:00 pm (start) / 10:00 pm (finish).  So, I carted my laundry downstairs, and got it done in time for RQS's arrival tomorrow.

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While I write this, I have MSNBC on in the background.  Earlier, I had our former president's news conference on for a while.  As much as MSNBC panders to an educated elite, the ex president panders to an uninformed audience, an audience who lets authority figures feed them misinformation to be ingested without critical analysis.  Sadly, a significant part of our population believes his nonsense, as he is the leader of a political cult.  I can tolerate the left's talking heads, as they aren't feeding their audience the message that "White America is being overrun by illegal aliens that have come to take our jobs."  But I have to turn off Fox News' propaganda, as they have targeted people who are afraid of any cultural and economic changes that put "White Privilege" at risk.

After sitting down to write this entry, I opened up a letter from one of my credit card banks.  Seems like $3,700+ was credited to my card in error.  Next time I'm out as Mario, I'll visit the bank to see what's up.  If this was a debit, I'd take off my nail polish and visit the branch before picking up RQS at the train station.   Hopefully, I can get this error fixed AND have the service charge removed.

Chatting with an Ex-Girlfriend, followed by Drag Queen Bingo

 

Why does the image at the top of this entry focus on health issues?  The answer is related to the first part of my day, when I had the chance to speak with my ex-girlfriend from 25 years ago.  She has been dealing with health issues which the doctors have been unable to diagnose, and I'm glad that I was able to catch up with her.

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The day started with me feeling lethargic, and unwilling to go out for an exercise walk as planned.  Given that I had walked 3 miles the day before, I figured that I could catch up on my walking tomorrow.  By the time I decided to have something to eat, it was already afternoon.  So I made a Tuna Melt sandwich and got back to chilling out in the apartment.

Around 4:30 pm, my Ex called, and we chatted for a while.  She told me of her hospital visits, her tests, and her doctors' unwillingness and inability to do much for her, save to prescribe some medications to help reduce some of the pain she was experiencing.  Although I won't go into all of her symptoms, I will say that the pain in her knees that she experienced when standing up made her dread each time she had to transfer herself from her bed to the bathroom to relieve herself.  If her medical problems weren't enough to ruin her summer, the health of her family and friends also was a factor in making this her summer from hell.  In addition to scuttling plans to vacation with a couple of friends due to that friend's health, my friend is currently unable to visit her ailing sister in her hospital.  And with all of this going on, she had to scuttle plans for a "bucket list" vacation.  (Hopefully, she'll be able to reschedule this vacation when she's feeling better.)

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By the time I got off the phone, I was starting to run late for the second thing scheduled for the day - Drag Queen Bingo.  (The first would have been lunch/dinner with LK, but she wasn't feeling well.  We've tentatively rescheduled a lunch for Friday.  We'll see what happens on Friday.)  So, I got shaved, showered, dressed, and made up, and was out the door by 7:00 pm.  Bingo was fine, although the place was almost empty.  For a change, I won something cheap - a gilded "Dust Collector" figurine shaped like a left hand with fingers crossed.

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This wasn't much of a day to talk about.  At least it wasn't a total "nothing burger."

Fogo de Chão with RQS - NYC Restaurant Week

 

Fogo de Chão is a chain of Churrascaria restaurants which specialize in what I describe as Brazilian BBQ.  No, my description does not do this kind of restaurant justice.  It is the place for Atkins Diet feast!  Grilled meats keep on coming until you have to say "Uncle!  Food Won!"  And for NYC Restaurant week, I decided to take RQS to their Midtown Manhattan outpost to feast like there was no tomorrow.

One of the problems of taking the train into Grand Central is that it is awkward to make an easy transfer (in midtown) to a "B Division" subway line to access one of the former IND system routes' subway stations.  I could make it to  Grand Central Terminal easily.  But to get to a station associated with the 6th or 8th Avenue lines, I either have to make an awkward transfer involving a block's walk underground, an out-of-system transfer involving a 2 block walk underground, or simply take surface transit to the desired location.  Given that I had time to kill and mistakenly forgot one transfer point, I ended up walking from 42nd Street and Park Avenue to 53rd Street and 5th Avenue (give or take a few hundred feet).

My timing ended up being perfect - Both RQS and I arrived at the restaurant at 6:00 pm.  And from there, we went inside to feast.  RQS had forgotten that I had planned to get a Mani-Pedi earlier in the day, so she was a little surprised to see me arrive in Marian mode.  Yet, the dress I was wearing had grown on her a little.  (She said that if I buy more dresses like this, that I will have to try them on before committing to them.)  After getting enough salad and veggies to empty a farm (I have to mention how good their Caesar Salad is here - I could have feasted on that alone), the meat began to come. And boy did it come!  Chicken, Lamb, Sausages, various cuts of Beef all came around to our table, and within an hour and a half we were stuffed like Thanksgiving Turkeys.

All too soon, it was time to leave.  I went back to Grand Central the long way, and she was able to take one train home.  By 9:30 pm, both of us were at our homes and ready to go to bed.  Both of us enjoyed this mid week get together.  I think we'll do it more often if I can find a few excuses to do so.

RQS has gone home. (But I'll see her tomorrow.)

This past Friday, RQS came up to spend the weekend.  Because I had purchased tickets to Lawrence of Arabia for a Sunday evening showing, she stayed over until Monday morning.  It was unusual for her to leave so early in the day.  But she had to get her hair done before meeting me tomorrow.

Once RQS was safely on the train, I took care of some business for the co-op at the bank, then went home to chill a little before meeting with my sleep doctor.  Soon, I'll have an appointment to take a sleep test (hopefully, at a lab and not at home) as a precursor to getting a new CPAP machine.  And then, I went home to rest some more before having the first interview for a study I've volunteered to participate in. Around 6:45 pm, I had my interview for the study, and all went well.  So I know what I'll be doing for the next 3 months or so.

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Tomorrow, it'll be my turn to meet RQS in Manhattan for a nice dinner.  Thankfully, the weather will be nice enough for me to dress relatively nice, so we won't look like Mutt and Jeff.  Since RQS will have her hair nicely done, I'd like to get a nice picture of the two of us together....

I've just enrolled in a scientific study

 

I won't go into details, but I've enrolled in a scientific study on brain performance that will last the better part of 3 months.  It will involve MRI Scans at the beginning and at the end of the study, zoom interviews, and use of some software for 15 min/day for 12 weeks.  This will be the first time I will be participating in any kind of study, and I think I should have fun doing so.

Why do I note this?

As I get older, I want to contribute a little to the world.  Doing anything related to politics is a non-starter, as I have way too many skeletons in my closet that, if exposed, would cause me a lot of grief.  The idea of leaving money to a scholarship fund still has value to me, but the logistics of setting it up may make this idea a non-starter.  Volunteering has lost its luster for me, given how little I enjoy many of the grunt tasks I once did.  So, when RQS told me about this study, I figured that I'd apply and see if I would be accepted.  And I was.   (More on this study later....)

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What I'd love to see is a scientific study on the types of people who hold rigid social/political/religious beliefs.  Is there something that can be gained by knowing how people function better than they know themselves?  Would this information be abused?  We already know how well political pollsters can gauge how the masses will react to certain messaging.  We already know how people react to selected advertising campaigns.  But at what level should this information stop being collected and analyzed?  Could we figure out why people join cults, and how to break their ties to their cults?  Could this be used in politics?  What about marketing?  Just because I'd like to see research in this area, I'm not sure if it wouldn't be misused.

We have extreme political polarization right now.  I'd like to be able to use scientific methods to end that polarization, as well as prevent it from happening again.  Sadly, populist leaders have an innate sense of how to manipulate people, and society at large doesn't have the tools to prevent populism from becoming a cult.  Life isn't simple as I'd like it to be....

I could ramble on  for a long while and say nothing of note.  So I'll end this entry here for today.

Lawrence! (A Quick Post)

 

I always find it amazing that the younger generation knows so little about the past.  Even worse, I find it appalling that it knows so little about the world as a whole.  And yet, there's a certain logic about this, from a quote (that I'll paraphrase) from the movie, Lawrence of Arabia. 

"It is up to the young people to fight the wars.

 It is up to the old people to make the peace."

Hidden the above are the attestations of valor and courage to the young, while the older generation is associated with the treachery that causes was in the first place.  In short, as I see it, younger people fight, while older people try to settle disputes.  Lawrence the man was one of those singular young people who was in a place to influence how the world would look 100 years later, and he did just that.

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What can I say about this movie that reviewers haven't said for the past 62 years?  Since RQS has never seen this movie, I bought tickets for us a few nights before.  I knew that she'd enjoy the movie, and that it would make an extra night up here well worth it.

Arriving at the theater, the two young ticket takers commented that the movie was 4 hours long.  They asked me what the movie was about, and I mentioned the birth of Saudi Arabia as an independent nation and the Arab world as it is today.  (I was amazed that they didn't know about this being a classic film, working in a movie theater.  But then, youth don't learn much about their recent past and it's culture.) We then took our seats, and sat down to watch the film.  While the film played, RQS asked me several questions about the film, as she wasn't aware that this story was based on real historical events.

Later on, when we got home, it was too late to do anything but go to bed.  It was a nice evening, and a good chance to watch a film on the big screen that should only be seen on the big screen.