YouTube diversions

 

I have been bored by most broadcast TV for years now.  Most of the so-called comedy shows are quite boring, as the quality of script has gone down over the years. (Yes, I am biased here, as my late uncle was an Emmy-winning script writer.)  So-called news shows often consist of 99% opinion and 1% news.  One can quickly get bored by commentators on a network all saying the same basic thing, only with different faces saying those things.

For the past few years, I have found YouTube to be a refreshing diversion from broadcast TV, although the quality of the videos are not up to those on traditional TV networks. It seems that there is a little bit of something for everyone here, albeit with productions of random quality.  Often, I find that I am watching shows which were once shown on broadcast TV, as well as regularly scheduled podcasts I find interesting. Yet, I stumble at times into purely amateur videos that I may watch because the creator is interested in the same things in which I am interested.

Lately, I've been watching videos by restaurant reviewers (UA Eats), Cruise Industry Newscasters (La Lido Loca), and Auto Industry people (Car Questions Answered). Please note that I watch a lot more channels than these ones, I just didn't want to list them all.  If anything, these days I find that I could go all evening switching between YouTube videos without going back to the traditional broadcasters.

But this leads me to one question:

If I am finding traditional TV boring, what is happening with the rest of us?

Last minute packing

 

In a couple of days, RQS and I will be heading down to Philadelphia for a few days. If it weren't for the fact that we would be seeing RQS's cousin, I'd be in Marian mode for this trip.  But to be safe, when in doubt, don't come out (of the closet).  So, I'll be leaving my wig, falsies, and dresses at home for this trip.

- - - - - -

I expect that soon, RQS will enjoy the comfort of staying home - as we have 4 days in Philly and 2 7-day cruises to Bermuda coming up.  By the time Thanksgiving comes, we'll both be tired of eating rich food.  And yet, we'll both do our best when Hudson Valley Restaurant Week comes in November.

We're looking forward to our upcoming trips.  I've never had the chance to explore Philly that much, as I was there with Ex-GF-M on one of her business trips, with another ex on an overnight stay, and with XGFJ on a visit to the Barnes Foundation museum.  Seeing the Mutter museum is on top of my list of things to do, as well as seeing the 30th Street Amtrak station when we get off the train.  Of course, we'll visit all the traditional tourist sites such as the Liberty Bell and the US Mint.  Yet, I'll be looking for some of the more interesting sites, such as the Eastern State Penitentiary.

- - - - - -

But first, I have to get my bags packed, so we can head down to RQS's place for the night.

More later....

I did nothing I needed to do, save for going to the dentist

 

Although I used to go to the dentist as Mario, I now usually appear at the dentist's office as Marian. I don't remember how this started, but I'm glad I could do so. I only wish I could do so with more people in my life. But, sadly, this is not yet possible.

- - - - - -

This morning, I woke up after not getting enough sleep.  I thought I'd be tired throughout the day, but I was wrong.  Around 1 pm, I got showered, dressed, and made up to go out for the day - just in time to make it to my 2 pm appointment at the dentist's office for my 3x yearly teeth cleaning.  after a little chit chat, I was out the door by 2:45, and off to get something to eat.

My next stop was in Peekskill, where I stopped for pizza.  After that, it was off to the supermarket to pick up tonight's dinner, and some ribs RQS and I could eat tomorrow night.  Once I got home, I put my goodies in the ice box, then rested.  Did I do laundry?  No.  Did I pack for my upcoming trip?  No.  As I said in the title of this entry, I did nothing except for going to the dentist - and I feel good about this.

We've just booked another cruise! (a short post)

 

RQS and I have booked another cruise!  Yes, we must be gluttons for punishment, as we will be sailing into the Bermuda Triangle twice in a little over a month. 😀

- - - - - -

Being serious, the idea of taking this cruise came about because RQS saw some cheap prices, and wanted to jump on one.  One problem - she might be biting off more than she can chew, and I'll end up helping her out more than I might have planned.  (We already have another Autumn cruise booked and an Alaskan cruise booked for next year.)  I guess that I'll have to be the voice of reason for our choices of vacations in the future.

I like the idea of taking this cruise, as it will allow me to compare apples to apples when evaluating two Bermuda cruises. (I have another blog, SlowTravel101, in which I post entries about cruising and other "slow" methods of getting from place to place while vacationing.)  The comparison between the two cruises should be published sometime in the next two or three months.  If all goes right, I will likely go on the second of these cruises as Marian - the way I prefer to travel.

- - - - - -

On other matters, I just got off of a co-op board meeting, and none of us are happy.  Our managing agent's site representative didn't show up again, and we were more than just disappointed by this. We haven't been happy with the quality of services being provided lately, and we needed to discuss this now.  Additionally, there are other issues that may cause us grief, and it looks like we'll soon be going back to twice monthly meetings until we get some of our issues resolved.

Hopefully, my duties to the co-op board won't interfere with the cruises RQS and I will be taking.

Lingerie - a short post

 

The other day, RQS needed to go to the store to buy some plain underwear, as she didn't have any clean pairs at my apartment.  Instead of going to Walmart as she might have done, I suggested that we drive to Lane Bryant, so that she could take advantage of a 10 for $39 sale, and I could examine the slip in the above photo.

So, after getting showered and dressed, we got in the car and headed to Paramus, NJ to do some shopping.  RQS bought both underwear and a pair of trousers, while I escaped and bought nothing.  (She said that I should have bought the above garment as well as some sexy undies I could wear with it.)  This morning, I placed an order for these items, and will wear them one day when I feel it's the right time to do so.

While in bed, we chatted about things, and she never thought that she'd be comfortable with someone like me, someone who prefers to be out in the world as a female and enjoys all of the pretty things that women can wear.  Of course, she doesn't understand it.  But she accepts it.  And I'm grateful for that.

The end of a long weekend

 

It's the end of the summer, and both RQS and I have the itch to cruise again.  Neither of us want to wait for our late autumn cruise to Bermuda to get away again.  So, over the past week or two, I've been looking for cruises we could take on a small budget.

- - - - - -

I dropped RQS off at the train today, then went back to the apartment to chill a bit.  But I never ended up leaving the apartment again like I intended to do.  Instead, I started doing things like paying bills (Ouch!) and again searching for cheap cruises we could take..  If we had known about our future plans, we would never have scheduled an NCL cruise to Bermuda.  Instead, we'd have taken the opportunity to schedule an MSC cruise to Bermuda, and taken either a Princess or NCL cruise to New England / Eastern Canada.  This way, I could present as Marian when sailing on the East Coast, and still get a cheap way to visit Bermuda as Marian.  But this did not happen.

Tonight, I presented RQS with an option: We take both the MSC and NCL cruises to Bermuda and compare both of them.  On MSC, we will have a balcony cabin, drink package, Wi-Fi package (maybe, I had one last time as part of the fare), and probably buy a 4 meal specialty dining package.  On NCL, we will have a balcony cabin, a drink package, 150 minutes of Wi-Fi, 4 specialty restaurant meals. I'll be able to do a true apples to apples comparison of both lines, as we will be doing virtually the same route from 2 different NYC cruise terminals.

Is this the best thing for us to do?  Maybe.  But I will be able to ask the security people at the Bermuda pier whether I could travel there presenting as a female and not get hassled when I return to the ship.  And that might be the best benefit of all for doing 2 Bermuda cruises so close together.

Get me to the church on time!

 

This weekend, my next door neighbors finally got married after living here for several years.  They are a nice couple who knows me both as Marian and as Mario. Hopefully, they will make use of the wedding photo album I gave them.

- - - - - -

Thinking about churches....

Every so often, I mentioned to RQS that I'd like to attend services at the local church now and then. This Sunday, RQS surprised me and actually wanted to attend a service with me. Both of us got dressed in nice summer dresses, and drove to the church.

Things were the same, but very different from the last time I attended a service at the church.  They had both a new priest and a new deacon, and some of the faces I remember from when I last was there in 2022 weren't there this time.  Yet, it appeared that RQS was comfortable with the Sunday service, while my back was bothering me when I stood up for a while.  Eventually, the service ended, and I was surprised that the deacon did some volunteer work at the LGBT center I used to volunteer for.  I was glad that some people remembered me, and that RQS was welcomed as well.  Both RQS and I enjoyed the service for similar reasons - it provided an emotional connection to our pasts. And I think we'll end up going there again sooner than later.

- - - - - -

One of the things we've been talking about is taking another cruise, this time on MSC.  Will we do this?  Who knows?  It all depends on many factors, including the timing of my next co-op board meeting.  I keep checking on last minute cruises, and it looks like we might be able to afford one if the stars are in alignment.

While I'm on the subject of cruising, RQS and I have decided to write off one of the "Benefits" of Princess Promotions, and use our usual travel agent to book flights, hotels, and transfers for next year's Alaska cruise.  RQS had some sticker shock when she heard the price of the hotel stay.  I mentioned that it is no more expensive than the hotel in which we stayed in London.  This helped assuage her concerns.  But seeing a price of $1,000 for a 2 night stay in San Francisco is enough to give even me some some a little bit of sticker shock.

- - - - - -

For the most part, our day was over after we finished our breakfast at the diner.  But it was worth the effort to get up early and have a change of pace....

Some random thoughts

 

Right now, I'm thinking about what will happen if Trump wins the election.  And it doesn't look good for anyone in the LGBTIQ community.  Recently, I  found a map of states which have passed "Bathroom Bills", and these tend to be the states which seem the most extreme in "traditional values".  One thing I've learned over the years is that when religion becomes too powerful (or too weak) a force in society, that society becomes more authoritarian in enforcing conformity.

Does this affect me?  You bet it does!  And it could get much worse if these religious radicals get even more power in a Trump administration.

Looking at the map, I found that my going to the loo in Florida was a criminal act.  Given that all trans people need to take bio-breaks now and then, it would be risky for me to get off a cruise ship in this state. This has placed an artificial restriction on how I visit this state - if I do visit it at all.  Just because I can still visit in stealth mode doesn't mean that I want to do this.  Instead, I'll avoid this state altogether, with the exception of when RQS and I visit her sister.

- - - - - -

Right now, my brother and I are looking to file paperwork to have dual citizenship with the US and one nation in Europe.  Both of us are doing this for completely different reasons.  Yet, both of us have the same goal - to have a place to escape to if the crud hits the fan in the United States.  Could this happen?  Sadly, the answer is yes.  When I see ominous parallels between this country and the Germany of 100 years ago, I get worried. Sometimes, it's just best to be able to get out of Dodge City before sundown.

- - - - - -

Not all is gloom and doom with me.  The other day, I had an fMRI done as part of a scientific study. Now that the study is underway, I received an Amazon gift certificate which is enough for me to replace a dying TV I have in the house.  The software I have to use on a daily basis is fun to use, albeit not excitingly so.  (I guess I am no longer into video games in the way I once was when younger.) 

- - - - - -

Dealing with bureaucracy can be a big pain.  Recently, as mentioned above, my brother got a bug up his behind that we needed to accelerate the progress in getting a second passport.  To do this, we need to get official copies of our birth certificates and that of our father.  I told my brother that I needed copies of our father's death certificate (I know how large bureaucracies work with official paperwork) before I went down to the city.  He forgot to send me this paperwork, and I knew that I wouldn't be able to get our father's birth certificate for a few weeks.

My brother has way too much on his plate right nw, and he needs to feel that he's in control.  He told me of a problem that took 20 years to develop, and that he expects to clean it up in 2 years.  He may be able to clean up his firm's mess, but it will take longer for him (or someone else) to change the corporate culture that caused the problem.  He doesn't see that, as he focuses on the financial side of things and not the people side of things.

- - - - - -

RQS found a cruise to New England and Eastern Canada that we wanted to take in September.  Although I could afford to drop $1,200 on a whim, I knew that RQS spending this kind of coin now would get in her way of being able to afford next year's Alaska cruise.  After sending her some financial details, she realized that we would not be able to get the price of the cruise down to a level she could afford.  But damn!  The cruise was so near, and yet so far.

We certainly could use a cruise this winter.  I was thinking of taking a cheap MSC cruise and paying for RQS as a Christmas or Birthday present.  However, the cruises offered by MSC stop in Florida, and I certainly don't want to deal with Florida's bathroom laws while traveling as Marian.  I guess that we will need to find another trip to take early next year.

- - - - - -

When I bought my car, the salesman "helpfully" set up the radio presets in my car, as well as setting up my first service appointment.  One problem - I had to redo the presets to organize them the way I wanted and I had to schedule car maintenance earlier than he planned.  His "help" wasn't that helpful, as I now have a service appointment scheduled that I'll have to cancel soon.

While I'm thinking about my car, I shudder to think of how the auto companies will try to turn car features from purchase options to subscription options.  GM is trying to ditch Android Auto and Apple Car Ply, so that they can convert services provided by Google and Apple for FREE, and making the car owner pay for Maps, directions, etc when in the car.  I guess this may mean that I'll have to keep my car on the road longer than the 8 years I planned. 

Why do I want to replace my car within 8 years?  New York, like California is trying to force people to switch to EVs from ICE vehicles (EV- Electric, ICE - Internal Combustion Engine).  I want to buy what will likely be my last car while I can still get a gas powered vehicle.  I'll bet dollars to donuts that we will not have sufficient electric infrastructure in place to support the ICE->EV transition by 2035.  

- - - - - -

Enough for now.   I hope you enjoyed some of my thoughts.....

 

It's hard to believe that Summer is almost over.

 

As I write this, it is the beginning of Labor Day weekend.  Summer is almost over, and I look forward to Autumn and its cool breezes.  In a few months, Winter will come and most people will be complaining about the cold.  As for me, it will mean that I'll have to ration my use of dresses to blend in more with cisgender females as I go out and about.

- - - - - -

Now that Autumn is almost here, I have a busy few weeks ahead of me.  Soon, I'll be visiting Philadelphia with RQS, and we'll also be planning a few day trips in the Hudson Valley region.  We'll also be spending time at RQS's place.  This means that I'll be spending time in Mario mode again. 😔  At least, she'll be happy to see Mario after spending much of the Summer with Marian.

Given that I'm participating in a scientific study, I expect that I'll have to find time each day to play the games meant to help develop mental acuity.  This will present a minor logistical issue when I travel, as I'll have to bring a laptop computer with me instead of the Chromebook I am accustomed to using while traveling.  The only time I expect that I will have a problem allocating time to this project is when I go on my next cruise and do not have access to Wi-Fi for the week.

- - - - - -

The arrival of Autumn does provide me with some opportunities to get dressed up a little and take RQS to a few nice restaurants.  Hudson Valley Restaurant Week usually takes place in early November, and I'll be sure to wear some of my fancier dresses (and, maybe some sexy underwear) when we go out.  Hopefully, some of our favorite places will be on the list, as I'd like to get back to Crabtree's Kittle House, Hudson House Inn, and Xavier X2O's (among other places) again.

Hopefully, this Autumn season will bring a better change of seasons than we've had for the past few years.  When I was young, I loved the deep red leaves we used to see on the trees and ground.  Now, we don't see that many, as the Fall doesn't last as long as it once seemed to do.  Yet, I still keep my fingers crossed to once again see the beauty I once saw in my youth.

 

Trekking into NYC and taking care of paperwork

 

I had one thing that I had to take care of today, and I can blame part of my failure to do so on my brother. Yet, today's focus is not on a minor screw up, but on visiting the neighborhood in which I used to work.

- - - - - - 

The plan for today was to trek into NYC to get an official copy of both my birth certificate and that of my deceased father.  I'd have no problem getting my own birth certificate.  But to get my dad's birth certificate, I would need an official copy of my dad's death certificate - which my brother was supposed to mail to me, but didn't.

So, around 11 am, I drove to Croton-Harmon railroad station, stopping first at a local deli. Instead of taking 5 minutes to get my usual sausage and egg sandwich, it took 15.  So I arrived at the train station with barely enough time to make the 11:48 train.  And when I say barely, I mean just that.  I was in the elevator with 3 minutes to go, and had just purchased my train ticket as the train came into the station.  Luckily, I was able to make it down the stairs and onto the train without rushing, as I'd have to wait another 30+ minutes for the next train.

Arriving at Grand Central, I noticed hot hot and humid it felt.  (I was glad that I had chosen to travel as Mario, as wearing a wig would have been too much to deal with today.)  30 minutes later, I was downtown and in front of NYC's bureau of vital records.  (I wish I had kept in the habit of walking at least 2 miles each day, as my legs were bothering me for the first mile I walked.) After checking to make sure I was at the right building, I killed time at the Starbucks across the street.

Once inside, it was bureaucracy in action.  First, one takes a number.  Next, one enters ALL the information needed to purchase a vital record, in my case a birth certificate. And then, you wait for your number to be called and to pay for your service.  While entering my data, I was told that my dad's birth certificate had to be ordered by mail AND that I needed my dad's death certificate.  AARGH!  I could have stayed comfortable and done everything by mail had my brother sent me the death certificate as promised.

- - - - - -

Once done with the bureau of vital records, I walked over to where I used to work (a much longer walk than I remembered) to get lunch at the Halal cart I used to regularly patronize.  Although there were 2 carts there now, I picked one that best resembled what I remembered from 10 years ago and ordered my old everyday order - a chicken and lamb combo with lots of white sauce and a touch of hot sauce.  But I now had a problem. Where could I sit down and eat?  So I decided to walk a couple of blocks and find a place to sit.  The only place I found with open seats was inside a playground for dogs.  This was perfect, as I had free entertainment provided by the dogs and their owner while I enjoyed my meal.

Soon, I was on my way back home, and I was back in my car around 5 pm.  Once at home, I fell asleep for an hour or so and then was ready to take care of some chores before calling it a day.  At least, I likely won't need to trek into NYC again for paperwork purposes anytime soon.

Did I do Laundry? No! But I did go shopping.

 

There's an old saying that goes: "Only Mad Dogs and Englishmen go out in the midday sun."  Given how hot it was today, it made sense for me to stay inside for most of the day, only bothering to go outside to do some shopping at Walmart and to pick up some things at CVS.  

- - - - - -

Today's shopping list included a motley assortment of items:

• New Sneakers to replace ones that are wearing out
• Makeup, specifically Eyebrow Liner and Setting Powder
  
• Gift bag to hold a photo album that I'm giving to my neighbors for their wedding.
  (They don't expect anything from me, but they are a nice young couple who I like a lot.)

My first stop was at Walmart, so that I could buy the sneakers.  In theory, I could have bought everything here.  However, I was in a rush to get the sneakers, then go for some dinner before an 8 pm zoom meeting with my Texas friends. While at Walmart, I encountered my friendly transgender checkout clerk.  When she asked me why I wasn't on her line, I noted that I didn't want to cut in front of the person next on line.  Then that person let me in, so I could chat for a minute with my friend.

Soon afterwards, I was on my way to dinner, and then to CVS.  Did I pick up the gift bag while picking up makeup?  No.  That would have to wait until after the Zoom meeting.  So I opened the zoom meeting, and it didn't last as long as usual.  (RQS and I would chat about this later on.  But I won't go into details here.)  I still had to go back to CVS to pick up the gift bag, and I could have our nightly chat while I was driving.

I found the gift bag I wanted at CVS, and took a long drive around Northern Westchester while chatting with RQS.  Instead of taking the usual routes that I would drive, I made sure not to hit the usual cell phone dead spots - this had me doubling back along the route I drove to Tarrytown.  Once home, I finished up some paperwork I needed before going to NYC to request long form birth certificates for myself and my late father.  (Hopefully, I won't have any problems with this request, as I need to file both my father's and my birth certificates as part of the chain of ancestry I need to prove on some government paperwork I have to start filing soon. And then, I started to do the brain exercises required by the study I'm participating in.  Were they fun?  Yes, only because they are presented as a game.  However, this could get boring quickly.

- - - - - - 

So, am I a mad dog or an Englishman?  Probably not, as I avoided going outside in the worst of the heat.  But I did end up going outside after all....
 

Do I talk about the fMRI, or do I talk about the brain function test?

 

OK, I must start by informing my readers that both things had to do with the scientific study I am participating in.  Neither was much effort, but both took valuable time out of my life for which I will be compensated.

- - - - - -

My day started with getting dressed as Mario.  There was no way I was going to go to the fMRI place in Laurelton, Queens with more clothing than I needed to wear.  Shaving closer than usual (something I wish I didn't need to do for presenting as Marian), I proceeded to get ready to cross the East River and make it to the MRI center by 2:30 pm.  Although I was in the area around 2:00 pm, I killed time, so that I could arrive at 2:30 sharp.

I had to wait a few minutes and fill in some forms before being directed to the MRI area to strip and get ready for the procedure.  When I put my clothes in the locker, I found that the locker door was off one of its hinges, and that I couldn't fully secure my property.  This didn't worry me too much, as access to this area of the property was controlled - no one would be likely to sneak in and steal my property.  

But I digress....

At 3:00 pm, I was brought to the MRI machine, and my head was placed in a position where it couldn't move.  Then, the "fun" began.  I was given headphones to deaden the noise from outside, a mask was put over my head to lock it into place, and then I was slid into the machine.  A cacophony of noise assaulted my ears even with the headset on, and then I developed an itch I couldn't scratch for 15 minutes.  

When the 15 minutes and noise ended, I slid out of the device and proceeded to get dressed to return home.  (I'm not going to like my next visit here at the end of the study.)  Traffic flowed, but slowed down a little the closer I got to rush hour.  Before I got home, I stopped in Pleasantville to get some lobster from the lobster truck, then continued home for the evening.

- - - - - -

The next thing on my docket was the webinar/base line assessment which gave the researchers an idea of what my performance levels were when the study started.  So, at 8:00 pm, I logged onto the webinar and spent the next hour filling in several questionnaires and playing "games" to determine my level of performance on each of several sets of tasks for their baseline.  (I'd love to know what each of these tasks were supposed to test.)  I'd describe each of these "games" as a version of the games "Simon" and "Bop It".  They started out easy, but got more challenging as short term memory and spatial recognition were exercised in these tasks.

I was off line by 9:00 pm, and am now awaiting further instructions.  Soon, the "fun" will begin.

 

 

PS: It took me about 30 minutes to get the studs back in my earlobes.  Overnight, one hole may have closed, and I may have forced it open without pain.  But the stud will need to stay in place for another couple of months....

Where does a non-op trans person go to the loo?

 

Although this may be a short post, it poses a dilemma that can cause us problems if in the wrong place at the wrong time - Where can a non-op trans person go to the loo while traveling across the United States?

When I first started going out as Marian, I worried what people would think when I went to the women's room to relieve myself. In New York, I didn't feel that I had to worry much - even though I may not have looked as much as a woman than a man in a dress.  But I had serious concerns.  Over time, both my feminine presentation skills and my confidence in going out as Marian developed quite a bit.  Most of the time now, I think people see me as an oversized woman instead of a fat man in a dress.

I've traveled as Marian, having taken cruises to New England/Eastern Canada ports, to Eastern Caribbean ports (only getting off at St. Martin and St. Thomas), to ports along the California coast, and to Hawaii. In addition, I've traveled to Washington, DC and Chicago, Il as Marian.  But I know that I have to be careful where I travel, given laws that affect transgender people.  For example, GOP states have enacted laws that limit where transgender people can relieve themselves.  I was surprised to find that Texas (with its laws that prohibit gender changes on legal documents) hasn't yet (as far as this map shows) been enacted a bathroom bill.  (Maybe I can find a way to visit my friends in Texas after all....)

Soon, RQS and I may schedule a last minute cruise to New England/Eastern Canada on the same ship that will take us to Bermuda.  This will only happen if a co-op meeting has to be postponed.  I'm hoping that we can take this cruise, as it will be nice to cruise again as Marian. 

 

PS: I can say that I committed a criminal act in one of the states I've visited by going to the loo.  It's nice to be a criminal!

The end of a weekend came with an oil change and tire rotation

 

Yesterday, RQS and I sat around the house relaxing until a little before dusk.  At that time, we went out so that she could practice her photography skills.  But this is not the focus of today's post.

- - - - - -

Today was the first day that I had to wear male clothes in a while.  In fact, I can't remember the last time I had to present myself as Mario.  And it felt strange to get dressed in trousers and a shirt, instead of a casual dress with a sweater nearby to keep me comfortable.  Yet, I'll be doing so for the better part of the work week, as I've scheduled 3 days worth of appearances for Mario:

• Monday: Get 6,000 mile car service (oil change and tire rotation)|
• Tuesday: Get fMRI for scientific study I'm participating in.
• Thursday: In-person appointment at NYC's Department of Vital Records or Department of Health  to get birth certificates  (for myself and my dad, each with an apostille for international use)

Although I might want to visit NYC's offices as Marian, it might be easier for me to present myself as being consistent with my legal identification.  Even if I were to dress as Marian on Wednesday, I will still a bit strange if I were to have dinner with RQS on Thursday as Mario.  

- - - - - -

Last night, I transferred my money and my ID into my male wallet in preparation to use it today.  When RQS and I got dressed to leave the house, I almost forgot it on my desk - I've gotten so used to going out as Marian with my handbag, that thinking about putting my wallet in my trousers wasn't an automatic part of getting dressed for me.

After dropping RQS off at the station, I relaxed for a little while before taking my car to the dealership for its 6,000 mile service.  Although I got there a little early, it took longer than expected before I got my car back.  And since I was in the area, I decided to stop at BJ's for a little (and I mean little) retail therapy.  By the time I left, I had tonight's dinner and some chicken pot pies I could eat over the next 2 weeks.

Tomorrow, I'll be driving to Queens to take care of the fMRI.  Sadly, I'll have to take the studs out of my earlobes for this scan, and I know I'll have a hard time putting them back in again.
 

Oysters with RQS

 

While at dinner in NYC, RQS and I discussed dinner plans for the weekend.  I suggested picking up Lobster at Shoprite, while RQS was thinking of Oysters at Whole Foods.  Guess what we chose - Oysters on Friday night and Lobsters on Saturday.  Yum!  (Just don't tell my doctor about this.)  Seafood would be the theme for the weekend, and all I might want to do was find some clam chowder or lobster bisque to make things perfect.

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I didn't get a good night's sleep before, and I woke up early on Friday morning having forgotten about our dinner choices for the weekend.  So, when RQS mentioned that she'd be coming up around 2:30 pm, I realized that I had to rush to get ready.  Like a typical woman, my dilemma was what to wear.  So I picked out a coral version of the navy blue dress I wore the night before and got ready to pick RQS up at the station.

Croton-Harmon station is undergoing major renovation.  The town is installing solar panels over the entire parking lot (at least, over the areas not prone to flooding) as a way of generating new revenue for the town.  This has caused major sections of the parking lot to be taken off line while the solar panels are installed above the parking areas.  (It'll be nice for many to be able to park in areas protected from inclement weather.  Sadly, this only helps those with preferred parking space permits.)  This week, construction took out the parking area that the local taxis normally use and this created a mess around the area where passengers usually depart the station and get to their rides home.  The taxi stands have been relocated to the far end of the station, people have to walk further to reach parked cars, and the pick-up area is much more congested than normal.  This made it hard for RQS to find me, so I had to call her to tell her where to find me.

Once in the car, we ended up going to Whole Foods for oysters.  Arriving at 3:00 (or so), the first thing we did was to order 3 dozen oysters and have them shucked for us.  30 minutes later, we were feasting on our trays in the store.  It's nice to be able to get oysters at $1 each on Fridays, as something expensive becomes an affordable treat.  Both of us found that 18 oysters each was a perfect midday meal to start a summer's weekend.

After finishing our meal, it was time to go home and relax.  Although we went out later for a ride, the oysters were the high point of the day....

Another NYC Restaurant Week Dinner with RQS

RQS mentioned that a restaurant in the Flatiron district had extended its restaurant week offerings, so that they end on the last day of the month.  Although this place (Sagaponack) had a $1/Oyster special for happy hour on Fridays, I suggested that we take advantage of the $45/pp Prix Fixe restaurant week offering on a Thursday.  This would be the second week in a row that I'd take the train into NYC to have a nice dinner.  But this week, I didn't feel bloated after dinner.

The restaurant week menu at Sagaponack isn't much different than its usual menu.  However, with Gambas de Ajillo (Shrimp cooled in a garlic and pimento sauce), Wagyu beef burgers and Peekytoe Crab Rolls on the menu, we just had to try the place out.  Although most of the diners simply dropped in for a table, we had made reservations for 7:30 pm.  Upon entering the place, RQS noticed that there were almost no males in the place.  (This would not be the case for long.)  And we were shown our way to the back to enjoy our meal.

Service was good, albeit a tad slow.  But we weren't rushed either.  Both of us ordered the shrimp for an appetizer, while RQS ordered the crab roll for a main course and I ordered the Burger.  If I say the shrimp were the best part of the meal, it's not because the other offerings weren't top notch.  It's because the shrimp had a wonderful flavor well above and beyond what we had a right to expect for an appetizer. Next came our main courses.  If I knew how good the crab roll would taste, I would have ordered that instead of the Wagyu beef burger.  Yet, the burger was cooked to perfection.  Dessert was either of two varieties of Panna Cotta.  It was a wonderful way to end a good meal.  We will certainly go to this place again.

RQS and I walked to Union Square holding hands all the way.  It's nice for two women to be able to openly show public signs of affection in NYC.  I don't think I'd ever want to leave the NYC region if I didn't have to - it's one of the rare places that allow people to be themselves if they don't harm others.  It's much better than any place below the Mason-Dixon line these days.

All too soon, I was on my way home.  It was nice to finally strip and get comfortable.

Politics: Another term for many flesh eating insects.

 

Huey P. Long - Former Governor of Louisiana.

Huey Long was a one of a kind politician.  He was a populist dictator in many ways, and someone who pissed off many of the wrong people.  Although he championed the cause of the poor white man and believed in checking the power of the former elite who once ran his state's government, he amassed unchecked power in his own right and could only be stopped by a bullet from an assassin's gun.

Why is this important?

Long's family continued to dominate his state's politics long after his death, and represents the danger of vesting too much power in one person and in one person's family. Today, we have a choice between "Honest Politicians" (def: One who when bought, stays bought) and others who will abuse power once they have it and destroy our political system for their own gain.

Given that I am a member of the LGBTIQ community, I am very concerned about what will happen if Trump gets elected.  How many people do you know that can go bankrupt several times and be considered a successful politician by his cult members?  How many of my readers know that he made $300,000 by endorsing an edition of the bible - a book that he never has read and never will read.  Every decision he makes is short term in nature, and is done to refresh his bank account or to indulge his desire for absolute power.  His alliance with hard line Christian Fundamentalists puts my life at risk, as I don't want to go back to living life as in the gender which I was assigned at birth.  Although I could go stealth, I don't trust that my privacy will be respected in any regime where he is the leader - I would not be safe if our community is hunted down as Jews were in Nazi Germany.

Sadly, many of the "Never Trump" Republicans have sold their souls to keep being elected and having their hands greased by people wanting favors.  They fear Trump's cult.  Even though many hate him, they are afraid of being voted out of power.  So, they mouth support for this evil man and make him stronger.  These people have as much use to me as a lone star tick, as I don't like what wither species can do to me.

Luckily, we have a good chance of keeping our former president far from the White House, now that Kamala Harris is the Democratic Presidential nominee.  The Democratic party is far from perfect - it wants to protect illegal aliens already in this country instead of shipping them back to their homelands. Yet, it does want to make sure that all asylum seekers get their day in court without having to wait for years due to an underfunded court system - a more humane way of dealing with part of the problem. We have a choice between humanity and inhumanity.  I'm choosing to err on the side of humanity.  How about you?

The older I get, the more I know when to get worried or not.

 

There is one big advantage to being young: The invincibility that one often feels propels us to take chances in life that older and wiser people might not take.  For example, when young, we often choose our mates on superficial characteristics.  For example: Is s/he good looking?  This question may have evolved as a way to determine the health characteristics of a person during the age that they are most fertile.  It also can reflect how high a status level a mate might have (especially in males), as both attractiveness and height can reflect both physical health and social position. 

But what questions should we ask as we get older?  What advantages do we have because we have successfully made it to old age?  This is where I feel that I have gotten better as I've gotten older.  Yes, my body is slowly breaking down as a normal part of aging.  But the memories and skills I've developed over those years have given me the insights to ask better questions when choosing a mate.

Lately, I've been thinking about how many big mistakes I've made in my life.  Some of these mistakes occurred because I didn't have enough knowledge to make wise decisions.  Others were made because I didn't have the skills to implement those wise decisions.  When I was young, I had low expectations - if the woman I dated accepted me and we didn't kill each other, then she was acceptable.  Can I say that I'd have married my late wife had I known what would happen in the future?  Maybe not.  But would she have chosen me had she known what would occur in our marriage?  Again, maybe not.  I could say similar things about other women I've dated.  But with RQS, both of us knew what we were getting early on in our relationship, and we have similar values with complimentary communication styles.  This makes having a healthy relationship possible, and we have yet to shout "Tastes Great!" or "Less Filling!" at each other..

Many men look for "a nurse and a purse" when they look for a woman in their senior years.  Women also look for the same, with emphasis on the purse due to inequality of wealth between the genders.  Neither of us wanted that.  We simply wanted companionship, with a little romance on the side.  RQS knew I was transgender from our second date, and I knew about her issues the day I met her.  We feel good when we're together, and I'm glad that she brings up issues for me to handle before they have the chance to fester and cause us problems.

I'm hoping that we'll be able to take advantage of the benefits of being old before the drawbacks cripple us and make it impossible for us to enjoy the rest of our lives.  After my mom died, my dad became less active over the years, and eventually not able to live on his own.  Neither RQS nor I want to have old age take away our abilities to live life without being in a care home.  The care home may be in our futures.  But until then, we will try to live as best we can.  (Albeit with me in dresses most of the time.)

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But what do I worry about?

Lately, I find myself worrying about the possibility that the United States will become a fundamentalist "Christian" autocracy led by a bombastic narcissistic grifter.  It's bad enough that this person is a cult leader.  Unfortunately, we have seen the mess he made of this country in his 4 years in power.  Now, he has had 4 years to learn how to cement his control over the country, I'm afraid of what he will do to anyone who is not a white, straight, christian, cisgender male.  As it stands GOP loyalists have turned the clock back to 1973.  I'm afraid that it will turn the clock back to 1925.  

If we examine the events that occurred to end the "Roaring Twenties", American society changed from being an optimistic, outward looking people to a pessimistic, inward looking people within a few years.  What will happen if the GOP gets full control of the country again?  Will they screw things up as they did in the 1920's?  Will America become more like Nazi Germany than the USA under the New Deal?  Who knows?  But this is what I worry about at night....

 

I did virtually nothing, save walk 3/4 mile.

 

Buying 3 exercise dresses has motivated me to go outside and walk.  Yes, I wonder if people see this T-Gal as just a fat woman trying to stay mobile, or whether they see this T-Gal as a man in a dress.  Given that I'm comfortable going outside as a woman in outfits like the photo above, I do so - and no one seems to be batting an eyelash.

I've found that in order for my face to look more feminine, prop glasses (no corrective lenses) are a must.  If I didn't wear them, people would focus on the parts of my face where I don't want any focus.  (Could facial feminization surgery be in my future?  Only RQS will be able to answer that in a few years.)

Over time, I'd like to find an inexpensive yoga studio near me where I could go as Marian and no one batting an eyelash.  I've come close, but finding a studio has not been at the top of my priority list.  Yet, my goal is to get back to a size 20-22 within a couple of years.  To do that, it'll take diet, exercise and maybe a few shots of a GLP-1 agonist.

Today, I decided to take a walk at George's Island Park.  I've yet to find the official hiking paths there, but I have found a few vantage points from which one can enjoy views of the Hudson River.  It was a little cool for me to be wearing just this exercise dress.  Next time, if it is as cool as it was today, I will bring a jacket I bought from the active wear section of Lane Bryant.

After I left the park, I had a nice conversation with TCL.  And then I called my brother.  I needed to find out the exact spelling of the name my dad used on his passport, so that I can request a copy of his birth certificate.  New York City has to do a manual search on birth certificates which have not yet been digitized, as they are in the middle of indexing the entire physical database of vital records and the year of my dad's birth has not been indexed yet.  

Tomorrow, it will be dinner with a new meetup group.  Wish me luck!

Bye Bye to RQS and Hello to "Tall Vicki". (A short post.)

 

This past weekend RQS came up to Croton, and we had a relaxed time together.  But like all good things, the weekend had to end, and RQS had to return home.  As much as I am always a little sad when she leaves, it also is the opening for me to have some "Me Time" which I can use to recharge my emotional batteries and be ready for us getting together later in the week.

Around 3:00 pm, I drove to Croton-Harmon and kissed RQS goodbye for a few days.  Hopefully, she got home before the rain started.  This gave me some time to take care of some things, such as filling up the gas tank in my car and mending an article of clothing.  I figured that I could kill a couple of hours before getting dressed again and going out to have dinner with Vicki #1.

The skies opened up around 5:00 pm, with loud thunder passing through the area.  As soon as it came, it was gone. And I proceeded to the Sushi joint in town to meet Vicki. Vicki suggested a change of pace in our meal, where both of us would share a house special seafood soup for 2, a noodle dish with shrimp, and a mild maki roll.  I'd order the first 2 dishes, but go with a simpler roll with more flavor the next time we eat there. It was a short dinner.  And all too soon, we went home.  

It wasn't much of a day, but a relaxing one.